


Room for Two Hearts (Sequel to A Room in the Attic)

by Cleverboots (Amberlovesocean)



Series: Room [2]
Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-14
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-04 10:11:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 80,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4133637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amberlovesocean/pseuds/Cleverboots
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Kurt's daring rescue from the attic room by Kurt and Puck in 'A Room in the Attic', Blaine becomes part of the Hummel household. His brother, Cooper, moves back to Ohio to be closer to him, but he brings a secret with him that shakes the very foundations of everything Blaine has believed in his whole life. Kurt is there to hold him together as his world spins into chaos in a way Blaine had never imagined. </p><p>This is the sequel to A Room in the Attic and takes place just as the other story ends, which is a year after the rescue when Kurt and Blaine first meet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Secret

 

“ _You okay, babe?” Kurt asked, pulling Blaine onto the bed to cuddle with him._

 

“ _Yeah, why?” Blaine asked._

 

“ _Because I know you, and I think the trial was hard on you,” Kurt said, kissing him on the neck where he knew Blaine would get shivers. Kurt was right and got a little thrill that he could do that._

 

“ _It was, but now that it's over, I'll be better every day. Thanks to you and everyone. Sophia is so good to me – and all our friends, Kurt. I have never felt so blessed.”_

 

“ _Me, too,” Kurt said. “Now, let's get some serious make-out time before either your brother or my dad comes down and tells us to keep the door open, okay? ”_

 

_Blaine didn't answer, he just kissed Kurt, and pulled him under the covers to wrap himself around this boy he loved with all his heart....._

 

 

Thanksgiving at the Hummel house had been wonderful. And the cuddling and kissing afterwards had been even more wonderful but both Blaine and Kurt were tired and they soon fell asleep, tangled together as always. 

 

Around midnight, Blaine was shifting back and forth in his sleep. This woke Kurt up, long experience telling him that Blaine was having the beginnings of a nightmare. Sometimes he could gently stroke Blaine's side, caress his back or neck and Blaine would fall back into a deeper sleep, night terror averted. Kurt shook himself awake to try and do something to help. He placed his hands on Blaine's sides, running his palms down over the ribs that still stuck out a bit in spite of a year's worth of good eating. Blaine hummed in response, the ghost of a smile on his lips as he reached his arms out to hold Kurt closer. Maybe this would be enough tonight. Kurt fervently hoped so, he was tired. 

 

Just as Kurt was drifting off to dreamland once again, Blaine sat straight up, screaming. 

 

“Blaine, it's okay, I'm here, honey. I'm here. I'm holding you, you're not alone,” Kurt whispered in his ear, trying to calm him down. Blaine blinked his eyes, turning his face to Kurt. Kurt snapped on the bedside lamp. “I'm here....” he said, kissing Blaine's cheek and rubbing his back.

 

“Oh, I...I was in the room again. I'm sorry, Kurt...” Blaine said, regret filling his eyes. 

 

“It's okay. Do you want me to get you some warm milk?” Kurt asked, dreading the answer. It was cold, especially in the basement where their room was, and he didn't want to go upstairs. But he would if necessary, of course.

 

“No, thanks, Kurt. I'm going to get a drink of water from the bathroom sink.” Blaine slipped out of bed and into the bathroom. He came back with two glasses of water and handed one to Kurt. They both drank and Blaine got back into bed, pulling Kurt under the covers with him.

 

Kurt slid his arms around Blaine, spooning him close to his chest, dropping a kiss on the back of his neck where Blaine smelled like vanilla cookies and spring rain and sleep. Blaine relaxed immediately and fell back to sleep. Kurt waited. Sometimes Blaine would just have nightmare after nightmare and it was easier to stay awake than it was to fall back asleep only to be awoken by his boyfriend's screams in a few minutes. 

 

It wasn't like Kurt resented the nightmares and the disruption of his sleep, but well, he did. It had been over a year since he and Puck had spirited the boy from the attic room where he'd been imprisoned for three long years by his own parents – for the 'crime' of being gay. Kurt shuddered at the thought. He had been imprisoned for only a week in that same room when Blaine's parents wanted to get revenge on their son, and after just a week Kurt thought his mind was gone. The pain of being alone was so bad, the frustration and anger that consumed him were hard to even think about today. He could not even imagine what it must have been like to be there for so long, and know each day it was your own parents that did it to you. No wonder Blaine was still so broken. So, guilt was another part of what Kurt felt – guilt that he resented Blaine for having nightmares, something he had no control over. Kurt sighed. 

 

 

When Blaine's parents' trial was over, they went to prison. And Kurt knew they deserved it. But Blaine had somehow gotten it into his mind that it was his fault. That had led to may heated arguments, Kurt insisting they only got what they deserved – Blaine saying if he hadn't failed them it might have been different. Finally, Burt had come to the rescue. He forbid the boys to talk about it at all. Blaine was seeing a psychologist and he could take it to her, Kurt could do the same with his counselor. But they may not continue to argue. It took a while, but both boys finally agreed and that had been the end of the fighting, but Kurt could see the guilt eating away at Blaine. Thinking about how Blaine's life had been stolen from him made tears come to his eyes. He wanted Blaine to be whole again, he wished he had known Blaine before the imprisonment – but most of all he wanted Blaine to heal.

 

 

“Kurt?” Blaine was waking up again.

 

“Yes, honey, I'm here,” Kurt said, holding the boy closer. Blaine turned over to face Kurt. The light beside the bed was still on and Kurt looked into Blaine's eyes, liquid with tears waiting to come tumbling down. He leaned forward to kiss Kurt, letting a small whine escape as his emotions crested in the storm that was his brain tonight. 

 

“Let's plan something,” Blaine asked.

 

“Plan? Plan what?” Kurt asked. He wondered just how awake Blaine really was.

 

“I want to go do something tomorrow. I know the weather is cold, but maybe we can go for a walk in the woods or something. I want to get away from Lima, I want to go to Paris or something.”

 

“You want to go to Paris? Tomorrow? We only have a week's vacation, I don't think we can get our passports in time, honey,” Kurt tried to play along, just in case Blaine was serious.

 

“Where do you want to go? I have that money I've been saving, we might use a little to do something fun, although I know most of it is for college.”

 

“What about New York? You know how much I've always wanted to go there,” Kurt said.

 

“Oh, and we can see my brother!” Blaine crowed.

 

“Ah, Blaine, your brother is upstairs, asleep in the guest room. We can see him in the morning,” Kurt deadpanned.

 

“Yeah, but we could go with him back to New York and stay with him for a week or two. He knows all the best places to go in New York, all the restaurants, the theaters. I want to go!” Blaine enthused.

 

“Okay, okay, just hush. People are sleeping. That does sound like a lot of fun, Blaine. We can talk to my folks and Coop in the morning. Now, maybe we should get back to sleep?” Kurt was beginning to whine a bit.

 

“Goodnight, Kurt,” Blaine said, snuggling in to Kurt's body, kissing his neck and having no intention of falling asleep when Kurt was so warm and smelled so good....”

 

 

* * *

 

Cooper entered the Ohio State Prison and went through the protocol to see his father. He walked into the room, sat in the chair in front of the thick window and lifted the headset so he could speak.

 

“Hello, Cooper.”

 

“Father.”

 

“Thank you for coming. I get lonely in here,” Mr Anderson said.

 

“Like Blaine did for three years?” Cooper snapped, unable to stop himself.

 

“Yes. I regret that, Cooper. How is he?”

 

“Better since he's with Kurt. I moved my practice to Columbus, but I still have business in New York, and living with the Hummels is providing him with stability. He's getting counseling,” Cooper said.

 

“Still? Cooper, it's been over a year. Why does he still need counseling?” Mr Anderson asked.

 

“He just does. Being locked up fucking unhinged him. Why did you do it? I want a real answer, Father. Was it really just because you're a homophobe? Because I don't remember you being like that when I was a kid,” Cooper said, searching his father's face for answers.

 

“No, Cooper. It was the pressure. We had to keep your secret for so many years, then Sasha had phoned us when Joshua - Blaine, I forget you call him Blaine - turned twelve. She threatened to spill the whole story if we didn't let her see him. So your mother told her he was in Switzerland. When we saw her hanging around, we got worried and then Joshua - -ah, Blaine, told us he was gay – it was just the last straw for your mother. 

 

“But why? You should never have forced me to make a decision at such a young age, Father. I wasn't blameless, but I was a child myself," Cooper said, playing with his keys and avoiding looking at his father.  


 

“You're not going to tell him the truth, are you?” Mr Anderson asked, looking worried. “My life is over. I know I made bad decisions from the time you were just twelve, and it never got better. I'm at peace being in here. I deserve it, Cooper, and all I can do is ask your forgiveness. But you need to know, I'll take your secret to my grave if need be. He'll never hear that truth from my lips. Is that why you came?”

 

“Yes. Thank you, Father. Blaine has been through enough in his short life, maybe we can wipe the slate clean. Oh, and I wanted to thank you for signing the papers. The house and all the property and accounts have been changed to split between Blaine and myself. I know we can't sell the house – and, frankly I don't want to, it's been in the family for over two hundred years, but you know that neither Blaine or I can live there. Too many bad memories. I'll have to ask him what he wants to do with it.” Cooper got a far-away look in his eye. He shook his head and his gaze went back to his father, sitting slumped on the metal chair. He didn't look like the strong, handsome man that Cooper remembered. He'd shrunk with age and he looked pitiful, but Cooper would never stop thinking of his father and the way he was when Coop was twelve.  


 

“Was it Mother that decided to tell me Blaine had died in Switzerland? You know, never mind. I know it was,” Cooper sighed.

 

“Okay, son. I know you'll do the right thing. And I'm proud of you and what you've done with your life. I know so much of this is my fault, Cooper, and I'm sorry it all turned out so badly. Maybe you and Blaine can begin to heal and then have a better life than you got with me and your mother. You're my only son, Cooper, and the only one I ever wanted. But it's time for you to go. Good bye.”

 

Cooper touched the glass with his hand, pressing it against the cold surface until his father did the same thing, then he got up and left. He had no desire to visit his mother. He had known since he was a small child that his mother was in charge, that his father did whatever she told him. He knew his father was just as guilty in what they had done to Blaine, but he also knew it was his mother's idea and she was the one that made it happen. It was all her idea -from the first lie when he was twelve to the last one when they took Kurt Hummel hostage. No, he would never go see her.

 

 

* * *

 

** Hummel house, the day after Thanksgiving: **

 

 

“Boys! Breakfast!” Carole called down the stairs. Blaine woke up, stretching and called back that they were awake and would be there directly. He turned to Kurt and shook his shoulder.

 

“What?” Kurt asked, coming awake abruptly and sitting up. He was so tired, last night being the worst for Blaine's nightmares he'd had in quite a while. He blinked and rubbed at his eyes, then tumbled out of bed to go into the bathroom. 

 

Blaine had been up earlier and took a shower, so he just got dressed and headed upstairs to talk to Cooper. The idea of going to New York with Coop and Kurt sounded better with every passing hour.

 

“Coop!” Blaine said, walking up behind his big brother and throwing his arms around him. Cooper grinned, so happy to have Blaine near him. Even after a year, he still felt elated whenever he was near Blaine.

 

“Hey, Squirt, how are you doing?” he asked, having heard the screams coming from the basement last night. He knew they were Blaine, but he also knew that Kurt was the one he wanted when he needed comfort. A frown crossed Cooper's face at this thought, but he was powerless to change it. He was glad that at least Blaine had someone that cared enough to help him through these awful spells, and he should be thankful, but he still wanted Blaine to need him. He sighed.

 

“I'm fine, Coop,” Blaine said. He didn't like to talk about his nightmares.

 

Blaine sat down and reached for the plate of bacon when Kurt arrived at the table, sliding silently into his seat and smiling at his dad. 

 

“We wanted to talk to all of you, actually,” Blaine started. Kurt looked up for a moment, then nodded his head when he remembered the conversation from last night.

 

The other people at the table looked at Blaine. Carole had just sat down to spoon eggs onto her plate, Finn was not really paying attention as he shoveled hash browns into his mouth, Burt sat with just a cup of coffee, having gotten his breakfast at sunrise as usual.

 

“Kurt and I were thinking it might be fun to go to New York,” Blaine said. “Cooper, we thought we might stay at your apartment with you? Kurt has never been to New York and I haven't since I was a little kid, so with Burt and Carole's permission, we'd like to propose a trip for after Christmas?”

 

Carole and Burt looked at each other. “Well, I don't see any problems with it, as long as Cooper can take the time off to chaperone?” Burt said, looking at Cooper.

 

Cooper had a huge smile on his face. “I'd love that, Squirt! How about we plan to leave the day after Christmas and come home January second?”

 

Blaine grinned. “Perfect. We can watch the ball drop in Times Square!” He looked over to catch Kurt's eye and saw a beautiful smile on his face, his hand groping for Blaine's under the table and his foot hooking Blaine's ankle. The only one with a brighter smile was Cooper.

 

 

* * *

 

“Now, you two be sure and do what Cooper tells you, he's lived there and it isn't like Lima,” Burt said, probably for the tenth time. All three of the boys nodded their heads. They were early arriving at the airport, but with the heavy holiday traffic, it was a good idea. The crowds weren't as bad as they had anticipated, but of course they still had JFK to get through.

 

The flight was quiet, Kurt in the window seat, Cooper on the aisle and Blaine between the two. He was not doing too well being in such a crowded plane, in such a small space and he was practically in Cooper's lap, holding on to Kurt's hand for dear life. He had taken the tranquilizer prescribed by his doctor, but even though he was very sleepy, he was having to do mental exercises not to start screaming. Cooper slid his arms around Blaine a little tighter and Kurt was whispering encouraging things to him. They had both experienced Blaine's PTSD spells and Blaine was determined that they would not stop him from living a normal life, so his boyfriend and brother did everything they could to support him.

 

Cooper finally turned him around to lie on Kurt's shoulder while Kurt stroked his temple and kissed his cheek trying to keep him quiet. 

 

Cooper started to sing very softly, so only Blaine and Kurt could really hear it.

 

“ _Hush, little baby, don't say a word...”_

 

Kurt gave him a quizzical look and Blaine told him it was a song from his childhood that Cooper would sing to him when he was home from boarding school. Blaine finally relaxed and fell asleep, but neither Cooper or Kurt stopped holding and caring for Blaine. They knew he could wake up at any moment and be afraid again.

 

The flight finally landed and the three embarked to find a taxi. Gathering suitcases and carry-ons, they left the airport and drove into the snow-filled New York night, Blaine and Kurt curled together in the back seat of the taxi. It pulled up in front of an apartment building and Cooper got out with his keys ready. The doorman met them and helped bring in the luggage, Blaine and Kurt looking around the apartment with smiles. Cooper opened the blinds so they could see the Manhattan skyline before taking his suitcases into the guest room.

 

“I'm going to take the twin bed in the guest room and leave you guys my king-size bed,” Cooper said, picking up Kurt's suitcase to tote into that room. Blaine followed with his.

 

“Oh, we didn't mean to put you out of your room!” Kurt said, meaning it.

 

“Don't worry, I'm fine there,” Cooper said, “The bed is soft and the view is great. I want you two to be comfortable, and this is my Christmas present to you – so, enjoy it!”

 

Blaine ran forward to hug his big brother. 

 

They had settled everything in and came back to the living room to look at the city, the brothers smiling at the sparkles in Kurt's eyes as he gazed at the cars and people rushing everywhere in spite of the fact that it was past midnight.

 

“Are you guys hungry?” Cooper asked and got grins and smiles in reply. “Okay, we're going to one of my favorite bistro's that just happens to be not only a short walk from my front door, but also open until three.”

 

They all bundled up in their warmest coats to brave the New York winter and walked the few blocks to the bistro. The waiter greeted Cooper by name and brought them to a small table near a window so they could watch the snow fall. The owner came to the table with a bottle of wine and greeted Cooper.  
“Mr Anderson! We've missed you. I'm happy to see you back here and brought you a bottle of your favorite wine as a Christmas present,” he smiled.

 

“Oh, Tony!” Coop enthused. “You know you could never keep me from coming back here, it's my home away from home. I would like to introduce you to my own family. Tony, this is my brother, Blaine, and his friend, Kurt. They are visiting me from Ohio for the holidays.”

 

“So nice to meet Cooper's family, I am honored,” Tony said, shaking hands with both boys and giving Cooper a sort of hug.

 

“So nice to meet you, too, Tony,” Blaine said.

 

“This is a lovely restaurant, and it is so nice to know Cooper has such a good friend. Thank you for the wine,” Kurt said, taking Tony's hand to shake.

 

“Good, I'm happy to see you again, Mr Anderson, and to meet your family. I hope to see you again soon,” Tony ended, turning to leave. 

 

“Thank you again, Tony. I'll be here for a week, then back to Ohio. But I'm maintaining the apartment here, so you'll see me again. Tell Maria I send my love,” Cooper said with a pat to Tony's back.

 

He opened the wine and filled the three glasses.

 

“A toast to us, and to a wonderful new year on the horizon. I know the coming year will be better than this one.” Cooper smiled at Blaine and Kurt who touched glasses and each had a sip.

 

“Oh, that's delicious!” Kurt said, looking at Cooper.

 

“It's my favorite,” he started to say when the waitress came over.

 

They ordered their food, Cooper suggesting his favorite items and the boys took his suggestions. Blaine ordered a Monte Cristo and Kurt the Seafood Risotto. Cooper ordered his usual: the Red Wine Braised Short Ribs with mashed celery roots. The next hour was spent drinking the wine and consuming all the food, sharing bites and laughing and talking into the night. Completely filled and feeling great, they walked back to the apartment.

 

“I love New York already,” Blaine said, hugging his brother.

 

“Thank you so much, Cooper,” Kurt added, “I had a great time tonight.”


	2. The Truth

Cooper took his leave and went to the guest bedroom at the west end of the apartment. Blaine and Kurt turned the other way and made their way to Coop's room at the east end.

 

“That was wonderful, wasn't it?” Blaine asked as he slipped his clothes off to get ready for bed. Kurt came close and kissed his neck, putting his arms around Blaine from behind.

 

“This is pretty wonderful, too,” he smiled, continuing to kiss across Blaine's shoulder. Blaine turned in his arms and started unbuttoning Kurt's shirt. Kurt unbuckled his belt and began to take off his slacks. When both boys were rid of their clothes, they slid under the covers and cuddled together, kissing and petting as they relaxed.

 

“What do you want to see in New York while we're here?” Blaine asked.

 

“The Fashion District, Broadway, Central Park. I guess all the touristy places. It's only a week, so we can hit the highlights. We can always come back for more later,” Kurt shared.

 

“I don't know what Cooper has planned, he didn't tell me, but I know he sleeps in late, so we could stay up and talk for a while if you want.”

 

“Talk?” Kurt asked, eyebrow raised in question.

 

“Okay, maybe we could find something else, quieter, to do?” Blaine grinned. He leaned over and turned off the bedside light.

 

No sooner than the light was off then he was on top of Kurt, holding his wrists above his head and positioning himself between Kurt's legs. Kurt whined in surprise but caught up quickly, leaning up to place his lips against Blaine's and moving in a sensuous slide, finally tasting Blaine's lower lip by sucking it into his mouth for a second before pushing his tongue into Blaine's mouth. Blaine responded by moving over Kurt's body, slowly sliding back and forth until he felt the response he was waiting for, then moaning softly in Kurt's ear.

 

“Ah...oh...Kurt, you are just so sexy. Your skin is so soft against mine, it's like silk.”

 

Blaine backed up a little, reaching over the edge of the bed to find something he had left just under the bed in a box. He moved a bit until he found it.

 

“Kurt, do you trust me?” Blaine asked and Kurt nodded. Blaine produced a mask and asked Kurt to put it on. It covered his eyes completely.

 

“You can't see anything, right?” Blaine asked and Kurt nodded, a bit apprehensive but willing to go along. Blaine didn't say anything more, just hit the button on his iPod to start some soft music. He pulled the covers back to expose Kurt's naked body and stopped for a moment to admire it. Kurt was so beautiful, his skin pale with rosy highlights. He had a taut muscled abdomen and well-balanced proportions with long, long legs. His thighs were rounded but not fat, just enough to define their shape, like a marble statue. Blaine leaned over to get another item out of the box.

 

Blaine took the piece of burlap and drew it across Kurt's chest, the rough fabric scratching gently against the delicate skin creating friction. Blaine didn't put any pressure on the fabric, just moved it back and forth, up Kurt's legs and around the tops of his thighs, up over his belly.

 

Next, Blaine brought a soft, warm rabbit skin out of the box and draped it over Kurt's shoulder, bringing it down over his body in the same places he had moved the burlap but Kurt responded differently to this, almost curling himself up to get more pressure to the touch and Blaine had to put a restraining hand on his shoulder to remind him to lie still. Kurt's skin was covered in goose flesh and he was breathing very fast in anticipation of the next texture to touch his body.

 

“Last one, baby,” Blaine cooed. He pulled a silk scarf through his hands and let it float over Kurt's chest, causing a quiver over his skin.

 

Gathering the soft fabric in his hand, Blaine let it fall across Kurt's chest once again, but moved it so it slithered over the bicep on Kurt's right arm. Kurt let out a sigh, tensing to feel where the fabric would touch him next. Blaine didn't let it lose connection with his skin, but moved it across Kurt's chest and down the other arm, then back to his chest. He bunched it up again to just let it dangle over his belly and pool onto his groin. Kurt groaned a little, almost a sigh as the soft fabric slipped over his hot skin. It was just a tease, not enough to create any friction at all, just a petal-soft touch that made him want more, so much more. He whined out his need, reaching for Blaine. But Blaine was quick and jumped back in time and Kurt grabbed air. He grunted in frustration.

 

“Lie back, Kurt, I'll take care of you,” Blaine whispered as Kurt laid down on the towel he had placed in the bed earlier. He took the silk scarf and wrapped it around his hand and stroked Kurt's thighs very lightly, just skimming over his skin slowly. He did that until Kurt was relaxed, sighing when the touch felt better in some places. He got harder as the slow anticipation of things to come took over his imagination. Blaine moved the edges of the silk over the taut muscles, humming with desire as Kurt began to get restless again, trying to anticipate where Blaine was going with the fabric and trying to get it back to where it felt best.

 

Eventually, Blaine couldn't wait any longer and wrapped the scarf around his boyfriend's erection and began to stroke Kurt's skin. Blaine let Kurt pull him closer, their skin touching in many places, closer still until Blaine was on top of Kurt, removing the mask as he kissed his face, his lips, as he rubbed his hands over all the places he was teasing with the silk. They were rubbing together, Blaine undid the scarf and reached down to hold their cocks together, wrapping the soft silk around them and stroking - groaning as the friction began to gather in his belly in a heated ball. He looked into Kurt's eyes and saw the dark pupils of desire. That look was doing more to Blaine than any of the touching or stroking and he looked deeply back into the blue gray eyes, feeling his heart beat faster. He couldn't blink, staring into those eyes and the ball of lava in his belly spread through his lower body and he let out a gasp as his orgasm hit him. He struggled to keep his eyes open to see Kurt as he reached his peak as Blaine's jerking cock provided the catalyst.

 

They fell back, gasping for oxygen as the after tremors shook their bodies. They automatically grasped each other in their arms, touching cheeks together and murmuring their love in quiet words. They lay together for a long time, finally gathering the soiled towel off the sheets and making the bed so they could go to sleep. “I hope that wasn't one of my silk scarves, Blaine...” Kurt said with a giggle in his voice.

 

“No, it was just a piece of silk I bought at the fabric store,” Blaine assured him, mumbling something about not being fool enough to take his life in his hands like that...

 

“You went to a fabric store without me?” Kurt said in mock-shock, earning a grin and a laugh from Blaine.

 

Kurt lay down on Blaine's shoulder, cuddling close and kissing him goodnight. “I love you.”

 

Blaine whispered back, “I love you, too.”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

The next day, Cooper did indeed have plans for them.

 

“I hate to break you two apart, but I think it might be a fun thing today,” Cooper started, earning a sad look from both boys. “Now, now, hear me out. I have a friend that works at Parson's School of Design. She has offered to take Kurt with her today to visit the campus and have a little tour if he would like?”

 

Kurt sat with an open mouth, trying to breathe again. “Oh, my stars, Cooper. Really? Oh...wow. Blaine, do you know who went to Parson's? Marc Jacobs, Donna Karan, Jennifer Cho, Anna Sui, Amy Astli, Jason Wu, Jenna Lyons, Alexander Wang! I could list a hundred more...oh, Cooper! Yes, yes, yes, I'd love to go! Oh, you don't mind, do you Blaine? I'll stay here if you want, of course...” Kurt's eyes were huge and he was flushed with the thrill of going to the Mecca of the New York fashion world, but he wouldn't go unless it was okay with Blaine.

 

“Of course you should go, Kurt. Are you kidding? When do we have to be ready, Coop?' Blaine asked, excited only because of Kurt's ecstatic reaction.

 

“You have about an hour before we have to leave, so go pick out your best outfit, okay?” Cooper said, happy that Kurt was so thrilled. He had called in a favor from a client to get this for Kurt, but he was glad to do it. Julie was a nice girl and she definitely owed Cooper a favor from when he took her case in a legal matter a year ago.

 

Kurt raced for the bedroom, pulling Blaine along to help him pick out what to wear.

 

Cooper wanted to be alone with Blaine for a while. He was happy that Blaine had a stable place to live and he knew the Hummel family loved him, but he was also sad he couldn't have Blaine to himself. He needed to tell him some things and didn't want Kurt there when he did. Maybe he could work up enough courage over lunch. Cooper sighed. He had planned never to tell Blaine the truth, but Sasha had tried to contact him again and he knew that he would rather tell him from his own lips than let Blaine know from Sasha.

 

 

 

“Okay, the cab is waiting outside, Kurt. We will go with you to Parson's and I'll introduce you to Julie. Then Blainers and I will go over to Gramercy Park for a while and maybe eat somewhere in Greenwich, then meet you back in front of Parson's at five. Sound good?”

 

“Sounds wonderful. And thank you so much, Cooper. You are a scholar and a gentleman,” Kurt said, bouncing on his toes in anticipation.

 

“You are more than welcome, Kurt,” Cooper said, smiling, as they left the apartment to get into the cab.

 

 

 

After dropping Kurt off at Parson's, Cooper took Blaine to a place in Greenwich Village for lunch, then they walked to the park, settling down on a comfortable bench in a quiet corner of the park.

 

“It's good to be alone with you, Cooper,” Blaine started. “I remember so many times when I was little that you were there with me. I remember you singing me to sleep, teaching me to ride a bike, reading books to me. I used to cry when you had to go back to school, Cooper. I missed you so much. You have no idea how I love it that I get to see you all the time now.”

 

“I love it, too, Squirt,” Cooper smiled, hugging Blaine closer to him. “But I have something serious to discuss with you. This isn't going to be easy, but it is important. We can talk about it here, or we can go back to my apartment.”

 

“What do you mean? How serious?” Blaine asked, looking upset. “Are you leaving again?”

 

“No, Blaine. I'm never leaving you again. I promise,” Cooper said, looking into Blaine's eyes.

 

“I'm scared, Cooper. Just tell me.” Cooper could see Blaine was bracing himself for bad news. Well, he wasn't sure if this was bad news or not, but it was one hell of a shock. He hoped he was strong enough to get Blaine through it.

 

“Let me tell you a story. You know how Mother and Dad always called you 'Joshua'?”

 

“That's my first name, why wouldn't they? Why do you always call me by my middle name?” Blaine asked.

 

Cooper tried to hold back his tears. “Because that's the name I gave you.”

 

* * *

 

**_Seventeen years ago, the Anderson Mansion:_ **

 

 

 

“ _You're WHAT?”_

 

_Mrs Anderson sat in the living room of the mansion, arms crossed and toe tapping in irritation. Cooper was in a straight-backed chair beside the sofa, blushing and trying to pretend he wasn't there. His father was sitting on the sofa next to the babysitter, Sasha. Cooper kept looking at Sasha. She was seventeen and had long golden-red hair, so thick Cooper had loved to run his fingers through it, even before..._

 

“ _I'm pregnant.”_

 

“ _Okay, so you're pregnant. You can still babysit for Cooper until your time, can't you? I don't see the problem. Why tell us?” Mrs Anderson said._

 

“ _Because it's Cooper's.”_

 

_Mrs Anderson sat very still, looking daggers at the young woman she had trusted to babysit her only son. If she was shocked by the girl's words, she didn't show it. The ice cold face didn't show any emotion. Mr Anderson did register shock as his gaze went to his son, and Cooper dropped his head down, wondering why the floor didn't open and swallow him._

 

“ _Cooper is twelve years old. How could it be Cooper's?” her eyes squinted down to slits and her arms tightened. Sasha was almost shaking with nerves, but held her ground._

 

_Cooper just sat there, wondering if it were true. It could be. He and Sasha had been doing things...she had asked him to do things and he found after the first few minutes of terror that he enjoyed them. So they had done more and more, having the whole boring summer virtually alone in the huge mansion. They crept up to the room in the attic and laid on the old mattress up there, naked while he discovered her beautiful body and all the things he could do with it._

 

_Now, sitting there with his parents and Sasha so scared and defiant, he was finding out how he was going to pay for his summer of sin. He'd known he was wrong to do those things with Sasha, knew she was leading him down the wrong path -but he gladly followed, and now...._

 

_He wondered why she hadn't told him. Why he had to find out with his parents sitting there in judgment of him._

 

_There had been an agreement made that night. He was not allowed to speak, his parents made the deal with Sasha. They would go to Florida on vacation next April, taking Sasha with them. She was graduating early from high school, and they would tell her parents that she was going as a governess to Cooper and would be traveling with the family. She would have the baby in Florida at their summer house, then when she had recovered her health, would return to Ohio to attend college, paid for by the Anderson's. She would not go to the police since she could be charged with statutory rape if she didn't agree to Mrs Anderson's terms._

 

_And that's what happened. Cooper was sent to stay with an aunt that spring and when his parents came home, they had Joshua Blaine in a blanket and he became Cooper's 'brother'._

 

_Cooper spent every moment he could sneaking into Blaine's room. If Blaine was awake, he would lift him out of the crib and kiss his tiny fuzzy head. Sometimes he would whisper that he was really his daddy and he loved him. But his mother was not happy when Coop spent time with Blaine and so Cooper had to do it when his mother was gone. He never had a babysitter again, just the houseman that would be there doing his other chores, but by then Cooper was thirteen and didn't really need it._

 

_In the end, he was sent to boarding school and was able to visit Blaine in the summers and during school holidays. It was never exactly right, but Cooper became accustomed to just having Blaine whenever he could and making the most of each time. But when he was back at the boarding school, Cooper would lie in bed and cry when he missed Blaine. And he cried a lot._

 

 

 

Blaine just sat there, looking at Cooper.

 

“Why, Cooper? Why are you telling me now?” Blaine asked. He had so many questions he didn't know where to start.

 

“Because Sasha was trying to contact Mother and Dad. I was afraid she might tell you. I haven't seen her since I was twelve, but Dad told me she had contacted them and was trying to blackmail them, that's why they made up the story about you being killed in Switzerland. To throw her off the trail. Mother thought it would explain it all away – and that's when they told me you had died.”

Cooper tried not to break down, but he could not stop the tears. He wanted to be strong for Blaine. He hadn't been able to be a real father to Blaine in his life, but now maybe he could shield him from anything worse. Unfortunately, it seemed that he was the worst thing that could happen to Blaine was Cooper himself.

 

“Ah...I don't know what to say. I love you, Cooper. Oh...should I even call you that?” Blaine said in confusion.

 

“Yes, Blaine. I haven't been allowed to be a father to you the way I should have, so...no, just call me Cooper. And Blaine...no matter what happened, no matter how Mother tried to keep us apart, I loved you _**every single day.**_ And I still do.” The words had hardly left Cooper's mouth when his arms were suddenly filled with his brother. Blaine had thrown himself at Cooper, his arms around his shoulders, his cheek pressed tight against Cooper's own, Blaine's tears mixing with his as he told Cooper he loved him.

 

“Cooper, this won't change anything between us, will it?” Blaine asked, a little pale at the revelation.

 

“No, Blaine. It won't.”

 

“Cooper? I want my real birth certificate. The one with you as my father. Can we do that?” Blaine asked, so many things running around in his head.

 

“I don't know, we can look into it, if you want,” Coop said, his mind going in a million places at once.

 

“You're a hot shot lawyer, I know you can make it happen,” Blaine said, still in a daze. Mostly he was relieved that his supposed parents were not really his parents. Coop smiled at his son. Wow, that was so much to wrap his head around, that Blaine now knew Cooper was really his father.

 

“I...well, I guess we better get back to Parson's. I don't know how we want to deal with this information yet, it is so new for you. We can keep it to ourselves - which I recommend for now until you've had a chance to absorb it fully. Okay, Blaine?”

 

“Is that why you sent Kurt to Parson's for the day?” Blaine asked, now sounding a little upset.

 

“Yes. I thought it was only fair to tell you in private so you could think about it and get used to it.”

 

“I can't keep a secret from Kurt, Cooper. I tell him everything, do you seriously think I can keep it from him?” Blaine was looking a little defiant.

 

“Oh, Blaine...no, you can tell him. I honestly just wanted to tell you alone, but then you can tell Kurt. I'm okay with that. Don't think otherwise, I think Kurt is the best thing that ever happened to you. Surely you know that?” Cooper said, looking worried.

 

“Yeah, I know. Besides you.” Blaine smiled, taking Cooper's hand and squeezing.

 

“Let's get out of this weather, I'm starting to get chilled,” Coop said, getting up and following Blaine to the street to hail a cab.

 

 

 

* * *

 

Kurt was still bouncing as he saw the cab with Blaine and Cooper pull up to the curb to pick him up. He was grinning like the Cheshire Cat with excitement until he got in the cab, feeling the tension as soon as he settled himself beside Blaine.

 

“Is everything okay?” he asked, noting Blaine's hand holding Cooper's tightly.

 

“Yes. We had a talk about something serious today, but everything is fine. We'll tell you when we get back to the apartment, Kurt. Tell us what you saw today at Parson's!” Blaine smiled at his boyfriend. Kurt felt apprehensive, but told them all the things he had seen and thanked Cooper again for the wonderful day.

 

 

 

Back at the apartment, Cooper ordered Thai food and they all sat in the living room. Blaine was on the sofa between Kurt and Cooper as they pretended to watch a movie. He was leaning on Kurt with Kurt's arms wrapped around his waist, but holding Cooper's hand like his life depended upon it. The tension in the air was so thick it was almost visible when Cooper let go of Blaine and made an excuse to go to the kitchen to get them all something to drink.

 

“Blaine, can you come help me,” Cooper asked and Blaine followed him into the room. “I think you might feel better if you tell Kurt yourself. I am going to go take a walk. Your food should be here in a few minutes and I'll be back in a few hours.”

 

“No, Cooper, its cold outside! This is December in New York,” Blaine said, clearly concerned.

 

“No worries, Squirt. I'm just going to Tony's around the corner. I'm fine. I'll call before I come back to be sure everything is okay with you two.”

 

“All right, Coop. I feel bad shoving you out of your own apartment, though,” Blaine looked at his father with his hazel green eyes wide, and leaned in to have Cooper hold him for a moment before he left. “I love you, Coop.”

 

“I love you, too.”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Blaine walked Cooper to the door just as the delivery kid showed up with the food. He came back with the Thai food and set it out on the coffee table before sitting down close to Kurt.

 

Kurt knew something big had happened during the day and he was afraid it had something to do with Blaine's parents, though he knew they were in prison. But Blaine had that look he had seen so often of complete bewilderment in the face of adversity.

 

He didn't want to pry if it was something personal, though, so he just held out his arms and Blaine came and sat in his lap, cuddling close for comfort. Kurt rubbed his back, kissing his temple and running his fingers through the silky black curls he loved.

 

“Do you want to talk?” Kurt asked.

 

“No, but I think I'll have to,” Blaine said, looking away and moving so he was sitting beside Kurt, but touching all along their sides. “You are just not going to believe this.” Blaine shook his head.

 

“You don't have to tell me, Blaine. I'm guessing that my day at Parson's was so Cooper could talk to you about this today?” Blaine nodded. “Then it must be something important, and I am fine if you don't feel up to telling me. Okay?”

 

“I know,” Blaine said, trying to figure out how he was going to tell Kurt the whole story. “Just let me tell you the whole thing. First, the man I've thought was my father my whole life isn't. And the woman I have always known as my mother..isn't.”

 

Kurt started to open his mouth, but Blaine put up a hand to stop him.

 

“My mother is a woman named Sasha. She was Cooper's babysitter when he was twelve. I haven't ever met her, but my supposed parents paid her off so they could have me. They got scared when she came back to see me and that's when they made up the story that I had died in a skiing accident in Switzerland. I have seen my birth certificate and it looked legitimate, but now that is in question.”

 

“So, was it that they couldn't have more children? Is that why they took you?” Kurt asked.

 

“No. They told everyone I was their son to cover up a scandal.”

 

“Oh, my stars....did your dad get her pregnant? Oh...no, you said he wasn't your father. Blaine, do you know who your father is?”

 

Tears filled Blaine's eyes. “Yes. It's Cooper.”

 

Kurt sat with his mouth open in shock. But he recovered quickly when he saw Blaine breaking down. He pulled Blaine close to him, wrapping his arms around his sobbing boyfriend. Was there no end to the trauma in this boy's life?

 

“Oh, Blaine, are you okay? I don't know what to do to help you, baby, I don't. All I can do is tell you that I love you no matter what and that if need to talk about this, I will be here to listen. Oh, my stars, Blaine,” Kurt blurted, holding Blaine so close his arms were shaking with the effort. Blaine began to sob harder but let Kurt know he would tell him when he was able.

 

 

 

“Cooper was...twelve? Oh...Blaine, how hard it must have been for him,” Kurt said, not that he expected an answer, but the shock was still new and Kurt was thinking aloud.

 

They just sat for a while, there was really nothing either of them could say. They served up the food, eating in silence when Blaine's phone rang. He answered and spoke for a short moment and then got up to open the door. Cooper came back in, and Kurt was there – holding out his arms and hugging Cooper. The three sat down, not knowing what to say for a while, but it wasn't too uncomfortable. Cooper finally went into the kitchen and brought back a bottle of wine and they shared it as they sat and talked through into the wee hours of the morning.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to remind you, gentle reader, that this is AU. Alternative Universe. I do not condone having sex with children, even if said child is willing and the partner is also a child. In this case, the victim does not see himself as a victim and the event was 17 years in the past. That does not make it okay, but it's what happens in this fictional story. Emphasis on the FICTIONAL. Okay?


	3. On the Town

The morning dawned with snow flying from the skies, and the view of Manhattan looked like a snow globe. Blaine woke up feeling a lot better than he ever thought he would after the revelations and wine from the day before. Kurt was still curled in sleep, his arms splayed across the bed in pure abandoned bliss, a smile on his lips. Blaine smiled and extricated himself from the tangle of legs and padded down the hall to the kitchen, pulling on a robe as he went.

 

They had only been asleep for a few hours, but Blaine was used to getting up at dawn, and it was a hard habit to break. The three years he had spent locked in the attic room had been cold in the winter. There were two thin blankets and the old mattress, which didn't help when the wind was blowing into the room through the broken window. So he had gotten in the habit of getting up with the dawn to try to get a little bit of warmth from the sun.

 

Then, when he went to live with the Hummels, Burt was always up at an early hour. Burt had really intimidated Blaine from the first day he met him. It probably wasn't intentional, but it had terrified Blaine until one day he came upstairs and was brave enough to ask Burt how to make coffee and he had been making Burt's coffee ever since.

Blaine had cherished those moments spent with just Burt – to have an adult speak to him as if he mattered, as if his choices in life were good, and the unspoken acceptance of his sexual orientation – that meant almost everything to Blaine. He had fantasized sometimes about what it would be like if Burt were actually his father.

 

Blaine closed his eyes. He had something new to think about now. He had a real father, and it wasn't the horrible man who locked him up for three years and told all his friends he was dead. It was someone he had known his whole life, the person he loved without reservation from the time he was a baby. It was Cooper.

 

When the coffee was ready, he poured himself a cup and sat down at the table. He really should eat something, but he didn't want to cook right now. He would just sit in this warm kitchen and look out at the new fallen snow blanketing Manhattan. He closed his eyes again for a moment, thinking back on the Christmas mornings he remembered. They all featured Cooper at the center of each memory. Coop would help him open his gifts, help him put together models of ships and airplanes, stack blocks for Blaine to knock over, and play board games with him. He could recall running through the snow in the big yard, having snowball fights and building forts; and in the summer, they would walk over to the river and float paper boats downstream. And all the time, Blaine was beginning to recall, Cooper would watch him. He thought it was just a big brother thing, but now he realized it was Cooper watching the son that was stolen from him.And Blaine's heart broke a little for him.

 

Blaine remembered that when Cooper would have to pack his luggage to go back to boarding school, there would be a terrible sadness in him. Blaine felt it and it made him so sad, he would hold on to Cooper with all his might, just to have his “parents” tear him away, threatening him if he continued to cry. It got so that Cooper would pack in secret and just be gone on those mornings, too distraught to deal with Blaine clinging to him as he left and later that day, Blaine would find something that Cooper had left him – a little car or toy boat, later a twenty dollar bill or a new CD or movie. And Blaine would make Cooper a card and draw flowers on it, or a dog and tell Cooper he loved him and he missed him and he would slip it under the clothes in his suitcase so he'd find it at school and remember Blaine was waiting at home for him.

 

Cooper walked down the hall to the kitchen, the smell of coffee wafting in the air. He turned the corner to see Blaine at the little kitchen table, his face in his arms, crying.

 

“Oh, Blaine....what's wrong?' Cooper asked, sitting down and wrapping his arms around his son.

 

“I was just remembering my childhood, about all the things we did together, how you took care of me, and how lost I was when you had to leave.”

 

“I'll never leave you again, Blaine. Never. I may not have had a choice when I was twelve, but I do now and I'll never leave you.” Cooper hugged Blaine to him, kissing him on the temple and rubbing his back. “I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but they didn't give me a choice. They threatened to take you away forever if I ever told a soul, and I believed them. I couldn't risk losing you, Blaine. I just couldn't.”

 

“I know. I'm not angry with you, I'm angry at what they did. I was angry about being locked up, but this...this is even worse. Oh, Cooper, how do we get over this? I don't know how to deal with this. But I do know one thing. If I had been given my choice of anyone in the world to be my dad, it would always have been you,” Blaine put his head down on Cooper's shoulder.

 

“I'm so glad, Blainers, I'm so glad.”

 

 

 

They sat still for a long time, sipping cups of coffee and remembering little things about their childhood until they realized it was afternoon and Kurt was padding down the hall to the smell of coffee.

 

“Oh, coffee!” Kurt smiled, still very tired from the night before.

 

“Ah....actually, this is the last of it,” Blaine said, tipping his cup toward Kurt to show him it only had a sip or two left in it.

 

“Oh.” Kurt looked dejected.

 

“Let's get dressed and go to lunch and get some coffee there, okay? Cooper suggested. The boys grinned and scattered to get dressed. Coop smiled and walked down the hall to get himself ready.

 

 

 

They walked through the new snow to the bistro around the corner, eating a hearty lunch and then walked further down the street to the park. There had been a few kids playing in the snow, but only around the edges of the park. Cooper and the boys trudged through to the center of the park, stopping from time to time to scoop up a glove full of snow to make into a ball and throw at one of the others.

 

“Let's make snow angels!” Blaine called and immediately fell backwards in the snow to make his. Cooper and Kurt laughed, but neither one wanted to get that cold and finally helped Blaine up off the ground, Kurt brushing the snow off of his backside.

 

“Just on the other side of the park is a little neighborhood group of shops, let's go window shopping,” Coop suggested and they all walked that way, Kurt and Blaine holding hands. They strolled around, looking at all the antiques and handmade things in the shops, buying a few things and then strolling back to Cooper's apartment when they got tired.

 

“Let's just take a nap, last night was pretty intense, for all of us I think, and then tonight we can go out on the town. Okay?” Cooper asked and the boys agreed.

 

 

 

“How are you holding up?” Kurt asked Blaine as they sat in the bedroom, leaning against the headboard.

 

“It still hasn't really hit me. I mean, I know that Cooper is telling me the truth, he wouldn't - couldn't - lie about such a thing. But to find out that the man I thought of as my brother all my life is actually my father. It's just too weird. Oh, my god...how did he ever live with that? I thought I was the one that my parents...well, I guess they're my grandparents...tortured. But to do that to Cooper, to let him see his son and never be able to acknowledge him, then send him away to boarding school. I just cannot wrap my mind around it,” Blaine said.

 

Kurt just had no idea what to say, so he held Blaine closer and kissed his temple, trying to give him some comfort. They finally just laid down to take a nap, Kurt pulling Blaine close to his chest and wrapping his arms around his boyfriend.

 

 

 

“Where are we going?” Kurt asked, wanting to know how to dress for the evening.

 

“I want it to be a surprise, but dress like you are going to walk the runway – semi-formal, okay?” Cooper said.

 

Kurt and Blaine went to their room to look through their wardrobes. They had packed for just such a contingency and it only took an hour for them to decide on what to wear and then they took another hour to get ready. Cooper knew the two and was perfectly aware of how long it took, so he had given them plenty of time. They emerged looking gorgeous. While Cooper wore a simple Armani suit, black with a powder blue silk shirt and a dark navy tie, Italian leather shoes and a dark gray overcoat. Kurt was wearing a dark charcoal suit made of some shiny fabric, probably a silk blend, with a dove gray shirt, brocade waistcoat in blues and purples, and a mauve bow tie. Blaine was wearing a dark blue cashmere suit, cream coloured shirt with a velvet vest to match the suit and a gray tie. They all smiled at each other as Cooper took out his top hat that matched his suit and asked if he should wear it, but Blaine was laughing so hard, he felt self-conscious and made out like it had been a joke. He didn't want to embarrass his son.

 

They went down to hail a cab only to find that Cooper had hired a limo for the evening. They were all tucked inside, Cooper opening a bottle of champagne to celebrate their New York trip and sat back to enjoy the views of Manhattan as they drove. The limo stopped in front of the Brooks Atkinson Theater and they all got out, the boys' eyes wide as they saw what was playing on the marquee.

 

“Oh, I read this book! I can hardly wait to see the play!” Blaine gasped, looking at the sign that proclaimed they were going to see “Peter and the Starcatchers”.

 

“Thank you, Cooper. This is just a dream come true. New York. Broadway. Wow...” Kurt enthused as he stepped away from the curb.

 

They made their way into the theater and found their seats, sitting mesmerized through the whole show, speaking only at intermission. After the theater, Cooper took them to a nightclub where they had a late supper and then joined some friends of Coop's on the dance floor. Blaine danced with several girls and boys, as did Kurt, until they finally caught up with one another for a song they both loved. The band was playing Halestorm's “Here's To Us” and Kurt sang it with Blaine as they held each other tightly and moved across the dance floor.

 

Kurt whispered something in Blaine's ear and the next thing was Kurt doing Patrick Swayze's part from Dirty Dancing as he did the bump and grind, holding Blaine tight in his hands, mimicking a sexual act that had the rest of the dancers clapping. He pulled Blaine very close and slid one foot forward so his leg was between Blaine's legs and he moved his hips, bucking forward and back while making moaning sounds into Blaine's ear. Blaine put his arms around Kurt's shoulders and kept up with his grinding motions as though they had practiced for months. When the song finally finished the pair were met with a round of loud applause and they went back to their table, sweating and trying to catch their breath. Cooper's eyes were just dancing and sparkling as he looked around at the adoration that was being heaped upon Blaine, and he was proud of him.

 

“I'll be back in just a minute,” Blaine excused himself, headed for the men's room as Cooper turned to speak to Kurt.

 

“He was magnificent, wasn't he? Oh, not to say you weren't, of course, Kurt, but I've never seen Blaine let go and have such a field day. Is he like this often, because I haven't seen it.” Cooper said.

 

“Not usually. I think the champaign helped a bit, loosen his inhibitions perhaps, but you're right, he doesn't normally allow himself to have so much fun. Do you think he's getting over the bad times?” Kurt asked, showing the deep concern in his blue eyes as he looked at Cooper.

 

“His therapist says he is making progress, but I really don't know what the hell that even means. He looked so happy tonight, but I am seriously worried about the news I told him, I hope it doesn't make him worse. But, I had to tell him, there was too much risk that Sasha might find him and I cannot imagine how he would feel if she had been the one to break the news to him,” Cooper put his hands over his eyes for a moment, trying to maintain control.

 

Kurt put his hand on Cooper's shoulder. “You have done the best you could do. Blaine understands what a position your parents put you in when you were just a kid yourself. That had to be the hardest thing to deal with I could ever imagine, Cooper. Let's just hope that with all the truth out on the table now, Blaine will have a better life,” Kurt comforted.

 

“Speaking of Blaine, where is he? He's been gone a while...” Cooper got up to go find his brother just as they heard a scream from the back of the nightclub. They both recognized it as Blaine and lost no time running for the noise.

 

“Blaine, what's wrong? Cooper shouted, bursting into the men's room to find a muscle bound man with long dreds on the floor, bleeding from his nose and curled up in a ball on the dirty tile floor of the men's room. Blaine was across the room, under the sink in the farthest corner his hands covering his face and his pants around his knees. A large man in a cowboy hat was trying to get the man with the dreds to get up but having no luck until another large man came to help. They got him to his feet before Cooper shouted again to ask what had happened.

 

“Someone came out to the bar and said there was something going on in here, that a young man was being assaulted, so we came in. He,” the large man pointed at Blaine, “had kicked this man and landed a pretty sweet right cross. I think he broke his nose and maybe his cheekbone. You know that kid?”

 

“Yes,” Kurt said, “He's my boyfriend,” before Cooper could get a word in.

 

“Get him out of here before any more trouble starts. If he's underage it won't go well for any of us. He's okay, I think. We got here before anything really bad happened. Just go.”

 

Cooper didn't stop to question, he and Kurt grabbed Blaine by his arms and scooted him out from under the sink, got his clothes back to decency, and walked him out the back door. Coop used his cell phone and they walked a half block and there was their limo waiting.

 

Kurt got in first, then Blaine and Cooper – who leaned forward and asked the driver to take them back to his apartment.

 

“Blaine?” Kurt asked, cupping his boyfriend's cheek and letting him squeeze into his lap, shaking. “Tell us what happened.”

 

Blaine's arms shot around Kurt as he tried to speak, but it just wouldn't come out. He shook his head.

 

“Did you get hurt, Blaine? Did that guy hurt you?” Cooper asked gently.

 

Blaine looked over at Cooper and shook his head 'no'. Blaine's wide eyes locked with Cooper's and he began to get a little calmer. He took a deep breath and held out his hand to Cooper who took it.

 

“He followed me in to the stall and asked me to drop my pants. I said no. He was a little drunk and tried to kiss me, but I wouldn't let him, so he got mad. I already had my belt unbuckled, so he tried to pull my pants off and I...I punched him. I felt his cheek bone crack,” Blaine shivered at this and put his head down, then shook it off and raised his head. “It was the boxing, Coop. It was as if I didn't even think about what I was going to do before I'd already hit him. Like a reflex. He was still determined to get my pants off, and he was really strong. I sort of panicked and kicked him. In the balls. He dropped like a stone and the other guy went running out for help, then you showed up. I'm fine, just scared and a little freaked out.”

 

“Did it feel like the time at McKinley when they slushied you and locked you in the bathroom?” Kurt asked.

 

“It did at first, but this time I felt like I could fight back and I didn't blank out. It was different,” Blaine said, and indeed he was much calmer than he had been on the occasions when he had a PTSD spell.

 

“I'm glad it wasn't worse than it was, Blaine, and I'm really glad you got those boxing lessons,” Cooper grinned, a little more proud of his son.

 

 

 

* * *

 

Back at the apartment, everyone got ready for lounging around and they put in a movie, Cooper and Kurt sitting on opposite sides of the sofa with Blaine between them, leaning on Cooper's chest with his feet in Kurt's lap. Kurt was massaging his feet, rubbing up his ankles and calves. Kurt giggled because when he squeezed a certain place on Blaine's calf, his toes spread out.

 

“Hey, quit laughing at me!” Blaine complained, which of course made Kurt do it all the more, Cooper joining in until Blaine grabbed a pillow and started hitting Cooper and it turned into a full-out combat and ended with all of them in a pile on the floor, giggling so hard not one of them could speak.

 

Catching their collective breath, they sat up and just looked at each other, still stifling a few giggles.

 

“Okay, I think it's time for bed. It's almost two in the morning, guys and a little birdie tells me tomorrow is someone's birthday,” Cooper said, grinning at Kurt.

 

 

“So, what are we doing when we get up?” Blaine asked.

 

“Just a sight-seeing trip of sorts. I thought we might just drive around and see some of the best stuff – the Statue of Liberty, Museum of Modern Art, and the Public Library?”

 

“Oh, that sounds great!” Kurt said, really happy. He was already so glad with the things he had already seen – the fashion district, Parson's, Broadway; this would be the icing on the cake.

 

“And for your birthday itself, Cooper and I are taking you to Times Square to see the ball drop at midnight. New Year's Eve is the very best day to be born, I think. The whole world is partying!” Blaine said, kissing Kurt on the cheek.

 

“I haven't always thought so. It was just after Christmas, so nobody had money budgeted for presents, everyone already has a party to go to, all your friends are drunk. I really didn't appreciate it as a kid at all. But to see Times Square? Well, that is just a dream come true,” Kurt smiled.

 

 

 

Cooper went to his room and they could hear him snoring in just a short time. But the two boys lay in bed, not being able to fall asleep. Blaine was still upset with himself for getting in such a mess at the nightclub. If he had just asked Cooper or Kurt to go with him, he knew they would have. He still had no idea what gave that man the idea he would be cooperative in giving him sex – no words were exchanged, no looks or anything. The guy was just drunk and apparently thought Blaine was free for the taking.

 

It was still hard to function sometimes. Being locked up in the attic room for the first three years of puberty, Blaine had missed out on learning how to deal with his emotions and blooming hormones. He had come a long way in the year he had been living with Kurt, party due to his therapist. Sophia had found someone that specialized in cases like his, mostly through her connections with the people she knew from her years as a therapist herself.

 

Sophia had been a prisoner in a Nazi Death Camp during WW II, and as a survivor she had come to America determined to help her fellow survivors. She had gone to school and gotten her PhD in psychology and spent many years helping other survivors, then helping returning soldiers from Korea, Viet Nam, and more. She felt she was too close to Blaine to take him on as a patient – she was retired after all, she was in her nineties, but had found a wonderful woman that was helping Blaine. He was very thankful, but he sometimes felt he wasn't getting any better.

 

The other part of his recovery was the Hummel family. Once they learned his history, they had each in their own way bonded with him. He was most afraid of Burt. Loving Kurt as much as he did, he knew Burt would be the biggest obstacle. Burt was fiercely protective of Kurt and Blaine had no wish to confront him on that score. It wasn't until he had discovered that since he always got up at the crack of dawn and Burt did, too, that they had something in common, and they built on that.

 

Burt was often gone to Washington with his duties as a senator, and Carole went with him frequently. This left the three boys at home with only each other for company. They had eventually gotten a schedule down and Blaine was comfortable there, whether it was with Finn, or Carole and Burt, or Kurt. Well, he was always comfortable with Kurt.

 

The one that he was still on shaky ground with was Carole. The therapist got him to realize it wasn't Carole at all, but the memory of his negative relationship with his mother......oh. No, she was actually his grandmother. Wow, he'd have to get used to that. Anyway, that was coloring any relationship with Carole. He had screwed up all of his courage and asked her to sit down with him one day when they were in the house alone and told her what was going on in his head. She was quiet the whole time, just listening and finally telling him she understood and she had come to love him like another son. They had gotten on a lot better after that.

 

Blaine was happy at school. Once they got Kurt back out of the attic room, it had all been in the papers and he had no more reason to pretend he was Santana's cousin. The other students at McKinley treated him differently for a while, some asking him to tell them what had happened, but he was reluctant to say. He didn't like people he hardly knew asking him personal questions or backing him into a corner. Those days had been hell for a while and he contemplated just getting a tutor and not going to school, or maybe returning to Dalton. But somehow his friends: Santana, Puck, Rachel, Finn, Lauren, and Kurt had all let the word out to leave Blaine alone. And for the most part it worked, people got less curious after a while and he was able to fade more into the background.

 

Blaine was doing well in school, and he was able to avoid the jocks and their slushie-throwing bullying most of the time. There were some incidents and Blaine had ended up curled into Kurt's arms, trembling and crying several times. But a lot of the students had become very protective of Blaine and these attacks didn't happen often.

 

Probably the worst time Blaine had gone through had to do with Kurt, and it brought their relationship to the brink of collapse.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

“ _Blaine, you know you said you love me?” Kurt asked one night as they were cuddled together in Kurt's bed._

 

“ _Yes, Kurt. I said it because it's true. I do love you, why?” Blaine answered._

 

“ _I was thinking. You were isolated for three years, and I was the first person you saw when you were finally free. I was the one that sort of saved you. Well, me and Puck.”_

 

“ _Yeah. Your point?” Blaine was beginning to think this wasn't going well._

 

“ _What if you aren't really in love with me? What if it's just that I was the one that happened to be there, that I was the limit of your choices? I mean, would we have fallen in love if we met in the halls of Dalton Academy?” Kurt wondered, backing up a bit to look at Blaine's face, his own a portrait of worry and self-doubt._

 

“ _Puck was there, I didn't fall in love with him. Santana was there, I didn't fall in love with her. Kurt, I fell in love with you because you are the single most wonderful person I have ever met in my entire life. Now, quit with this ridiculous crap and just wallow in my deep pool of mushy love. Okay?” Blaine said, smiling at Kurt's expression because he hated mush. Or at least he claimed to, but Blaine had his doubts about that. Like when he brought Kurt a dozen red roses on Valentine's day. He saw the tears in Kurt's eyes and the trembling lip as he read the card with a sappy love poem Blaine had written just for him._

 

“ _What if you only think you love me? What if one day you wake up and realize that it was all just that you were grateful or something and you don't really love me? Will you pack your bags and disappear in the night like you did that one night when you snuck back to your house to get your harmonica? What will I do if you're just gone one day?” Kurt was close to tears._

 

“ _Oh, Kurt. What brought all of this up? Surely you know I love you by now? Has something happened to make you think this is all going away?” Blaine asked._

 

“ _I just had a dream last night. That you left, and I was all alone, and I started to think that there is no reason for you to love me – nobody else ever has. It doesn't make sense that a gorgeous, talented, sweet guy like you would love me,” Kurt said, his eyes sad._

 

“ _Oh, Kurt...please believe me, I love you. I love everything about you, from your voice like an angel to your beautiful chestnut hair to your azure blue eyes that make me think of the sea, from your long gorgeous legs that wrap around me to your warm arms that hold me, to your kind soul. Don't doubt me, Kurt. I do love you, with all my heart, and I always will.”_

 

 

 

* * *

 

Blaine lay in the bed looking out at the moonlight shining down on the New York skyline. He was one lucky bastard, and he hoped he would always appreciate it. He was faced with a whole new thing to think about now. If his weird childhood wasn't enough, Cooper's revelation was still raw in his soul. How could he not know, just by instinct, that Cooper was his real father? Cooper was the one he went to when he was in trouble, when he was lost or sad. It would tear his heart out when Coop was forced to go back to boarding school. He must have always known. He remembered the days he spent with Cooper, walking in the woods, just talking. He missed him so much when he was gone. He was so happy when he learned to read because then he could write letters to Cooper and get them in return. Plus, Cooper sent him things. One day he came home from school to find a box on his bed that had come in the mail. Inside was a funny looking object – kind of the shape of a light bulb with a flat bottom. Inside were little black and white diamonds on thin wires that spun in the sunshine. It was called a 'radiometer' and Blaine could sit in the window seat in his room and watch it for hours. It turned as long as there was sun shining on it. He thought at the time it was the perfect metaphor for his life in which his heart only beat when Cooper was there to make it do so. Maybe he should tell Cooper that tomorrow.

 

 

 

“Hey, Blaine, penny for your thoughts?” Kurt nudged his shoulder. They were sitting in bed, propped up on pillows against the headboard.

 

Blaine smiled at Kurt a little shyly. “Sorry, I guess I was lost in thought. Did you want to talk or something?”

 

“Not if you were thinking of something, I didn't mean to interrupt. Your face would change from deep concern to happiness and back. I was getting a little worried you might be having a spell,” Kurt told him, taking his hand and squeezing to offer comfort.

 

“I was actually doing quite a bit of thinking. About all that's happened in the past year, about my childhood. About you.”

 

“Are you worried about us, Blaine? I thought we were fine. Is something bothering you?” Kurt asked, tightening his grip on Blaine's hand.

 

“Oh, no, Kurt. Everything between us is fine. I was thinking about how much I love you. I do, you know. It isn't just words, Kurt, it's …..I don't know how to describe it. It's like breathing. I don't consciously think about it all the time, but when it does cross my mind, I realize it's something I do every minute of my life, whether it's when I'm awake and aware or when I'm asleep. It's a function of my body, Kurt. Always with me,” Blaine tried to explain, but he felt he fell far short of describing the actual feeling. Maybe it was something that would always defy description.

 

Kurt looked into Blaine's eyes, those beautiful, soulful hazel brown eyes with their little green sparkles, and felt a shiver go down his back. He always felt like that when he looked deep in Blaine's eyes. Kurt knew they didn't need words when it got like this, they knew there was a connection that defied explanation. Most times they reveled in it. Some times they were in awe of it.

 

“Blaine, is there something going on in your head? I mean, we both know how much we love each other, but you seem to have something going on tonight. Is it something I can help you with?” Kurt asked in a soft voice, stroking his hand up Blaine's arm and cupping his jaw to look back into his eyes.

 

Blaine leaned closer to Kurt, breathing in the scent of his boyfriend, and closed his eyes. “I don't know, Kurt. I think I'm better, I keep believing I'm cured from all the bad things in my life. I don't have the fear spells I used to, I can separate myself from the fear when scary things happen, I can function. But just when I think the worst has been dished out to me – the imprisonment, the betrayal, the abuse of my parents, all the things I've overcome, just when I think it's over – it isn't.

 

“This thing about Cooper and all the lies I've been told all my life...I'm at a loss as to how to deal with it. I can't blame Cooper, but I also can't pretend I'm not angry. How could they do this to me?” Blaine sat very still, wanting an answer he was afraid he'd never find.

 

“C'mere, baby,” Kurt coaxed, holding out his arms to Blaine – who came into them with a sigh and let his head fall down on Kurt's shoulder. “It'll be okay, Blaine. It's just new and you'll get used to it. We can take it one day at a time, like we have done since our first day together. Trust in us, Blaine. We will get through this together, I promise.”

 

 

 

And they cuddled close together, whispering sweet comfort into each others' ears and kissed and fell asleep all tangled together, once more holding the rest of the world at bay.

 

* * *

 

 


	4. Patience and Fortitude

Kurt woke to find the Anderson brothers sitting on the bed in front of him, Cooper with a cup of fragrant coffee and Blaine with a cupcake, complete with pink icing and a lit candle.

“Happy, happy birthday, baby...” they sang in preference to the traditional one.

 

Kurt laughed, “You know, until I was ten years old, I thought “Auld Lang Syne” was Scotttish for “Happy Birthday!” My mother always sang that to me.”

 

Blaine giggled. “I thought she was Irish? You sing Toora Loora Loora to me when I'm feeling sad.”

 

“Yes, she was Irish, but who doesn't sing Auld Lang Syne on New Year's Eve?” he asked, cocking his head to the side in question, and Blaine took in a breath, Kurt was so cute when he did that.

 

“Blow out the candle so you can make a wish!” Cooper encouraged. He didn't want sad memories to mar this day, he wanted his son and Kurt to have the best day ever in the best city ever.

 

“Okay...” Kurt closed his eyes and then opened them, blowing out the candle quickly. He turned to Blaine, who followed that with a small kiss to Kurt's lips, making him smile. “Wow, I didn't expect my wish to be fulfilled so quickly!” and Blaine and Cooper giggled.

 

“It's almost nine, you two get ready and we can be out of here in an hour to catch a bus to the Museum, okay?”

 

“Ah, Cooper?”

 

“Yeah, Kurt?”

 

“I was wondering, if, instead of going to the Art Museum, we might go to a different one?”

 

“Of course, it's your birthday...where do you want to go?”

 

“It's near Battery Park, the Museum of Jewish Heritage. They have a permanent display dedicated to the Holocaust. After meeting Sophia, I kind of want to see for myself a bit of what she went through. Is that okay with you guys?” Kurt asked, a little sheepishly, looking at Blaine.

 

“I'd like that, too,” Blaine said, looking imploringly at his brother...no, his father. Oh, would he ever get used to this?

 

“Okay, no problem. I'll call and get the information, you two get ready for breakfast. We can stop somewhere on the way.”

 

 

 

* * *

 

Kurt entered the museum, hand held tightly in Blaine's own. They knew it would not be a pleasant experience, but they both felt they had to do this, to honor Sophia, to understand just that little bit more of how she lived. Cooper was right beside Blaine and walking through the displays he leaned on Cooper from time to time, a sigh the only thing he could give, words just weren't enough.

 

Tears were in evidence when all three of them as they thought about the life of their friend, little Sophia, who endured this hell, who lost everyone -including her beloved brother, Hans, who got up every day with fight in her blood, with strength in herself and lived in defiance of the Nazi regime and lived to help other survivors – for her they wept and felt unending pride.

 

They left the museum feeling so many things, but most of all, they wanted to see Sophia as soon as they got back to Lima, to gather her in their arms and tell her how much she meant to them.

 

 

 

After that, they saw the Statue of Liberty, and on to the Public Library - where Cooper took a picture of Kurt sitting on Patience, on the downtown side, then Kurt took a picture of the Andersons, cuddled together on Fortitude, on the uptown side. There were more pictures: Blaine and Kurt hugging Fortitude, Cooper with his hand apparently in Patience's mouth (hard to do since both marble lions had closed mouths), and they even got a bystander to get one of all three of them sitting on one of the lions.

 

They went inside where Kurt just stood with his mouth open, gazing at all the stacks of books, his heart beating fast and awe stopping him from moving. He had seen pictures of the library, but this was so different. In the way that you cannot appreciate the grandeur of the Grand Canyon or the Pacific Ocean unless you've seen it yourself, he could not have imagined the grandeur of this building, of this space. He turned and leaped into Cooper's arms, startling the poor man, but Cooper took it all in stride as he hugged Kurt back and patted him, saying, “You're welcome, you're welcome. Happy Birthday,” until Kurt calmed down.

 

“Oh, Blaine, have you ever seen anything so spectacular? Broadway, The Fashion District, the Statue, the Library....this is like no other place on earth.” His eyes were shining and his happiness spread to everyone around him. Even strangers walking by stopped for a moment, many of them thinking of the first time they had entered the building past the grave and majestic lions, to see all the books. Someone snapped a picture and waved Cooper over for a little chat while Blaine and Kurt moved around the stacks to look at the books and breathe in the unique smell that was only possible in a library.

 

Cooper came back with a little grin on his face, but the boys were too engrossed to catch it.

 

 

 

* * *

 

They went back to the apartment for a short time to regroup and rest before going to a restaurant for a wonderful dinner. Kurt was a big fan of the cooking shows on television and he was a huge fan of a certain snarky chef that traveled the world. But this chef had started his career at a restaurant in New York, and Cooper took the boys to La Halle for steak. They had the best time, eating the best food ever and drinking wine, just enough to get happy, and had a great conversation about their futures, planning where they wanted to go to college, what they wanted to do, how they would spend their time together. They left well after dark, taking a cab to Times Square and mingling with the huge crowd there.

 

There were lights everywhere, people to watch, music to hear and it was all just overwhelming. At the end of the evening, the ball dropped, counting the minutes to the end of Kurt's birthday, to the end of another year, and Blaine took Kurt's face in his hands and kissed him with everything he had in him, Kurt doing the same until they had to break apart before they exploded.

 

“Happy Birthday, Kurt. I love you,” Blaine whispered in Kurt's ear.

 

“I love you, too, baby,” Kurt whispered back and they held each other until Cooper came and put his arms around both of them, just smiling at their overjoyed faces.

 

“I'm going to put you two in a cab to go back to the apartment, then I'm going over to my friend, Mike's place for tonight, Okay?” he asked.

 

“You don't have to do that...” Kurt started to say before Cooper interrupted.

 

“I haven't seen these guys in months and I miss them. I will be back sometime tomorrow afternoon, and here's a little something for you to celebrate with,” Cooper smiled, handing Blaine a bottle. Then he turned and whistled and a cab came close, he pushed the boys into the cab and tapped the roof for it to pull away from the curb. He waved at them as they disappeared into the New York traffic.

 

 

 

Back at the apartment, both Blaine and Kurt were walking on air. They had done more, seen more, experienced more -both good and bad, than they had ever done in so short a space of time. They put on music and danced in the living room in their stocking feet, then jumped in the shower and let all the dirt and dust from the streets run off their bodies, dressing in silk pajamas to sit for a while, drinking the champagne that Cooper had given them. They didn't drink it all, neither one wanting to get too tipsy, and ended up in the big bed, arms around each other.

 

“Blaine, I know we love each other, and we've been together for more than a year. How do you feel about me?” Kurt asked shyly.

 

“What do you mean? I love you. Unconditionally. What else is there to say?” Blaine asked, a little uneasy. Was Kurt having doubts?

 

“I know that, and I feel the same, but all my friends have had their 'first time'. And, well, we've never even talked about it.” his eyes begged Blaine to listen to him, to hear him.

 

“Are you unhappy with the way our relationship is going?” Blaine asked, his eyebrow raising.

 

“Oh, it's nothing like that. I'm very happy. But I was just thinking about, well, you know...”

 

“Oh. I think about that, too,” Blaine blushed.

 

“It's not like we're never intimate with each other, but that would just be, well, the one way I can think of to get closer to you, Blaine. But we don't have to do it, I'm fine with what we have now,” Kurt said, smiling at Blaine; and Blaine thought he really did mean it. But how did he feel? It was true he did think about it a lot of the time, maybe too much. He'd woken himself up too often, thinking about how it would feel, how it would bring them closer together. He sighed and nuzzled his nose into Kurt's neck so he could think a little more before he said anything.

 

As it turned out, he didn't have to say anything. Kurt understood and just stroked his back, rubbing those small circles into the skin the way he loved so much. He slid down under the covers so they were laying together and Blaine shifted so he was partially on top of Kurt, and kissed his temple, down to his jaw and across his neck, humming in a contented way as though he was ready to do this all night. He unbuttoned Kurt's pajama shirt as he went, kissing and touching and following the paths of muscle as they curved down Kurt's chest. He stopped for a time to lick at Kurt's nipple, so pink and raised to attention and Blaine loved it when that happened. He licked all around it before using his teeth to gently rub it, eliciting those wonderful sounds from Kurt's throat that made his skin break out in goose flesh.

 

Blaine moved down under the covers, pulling Kurt's pajamas off all together as he kissed his way over Kurt's sensitive belly. He moved to Kurt's thigh and kissed up the inner part where the skin was thin and soft, like rose petals. He rested his cheek on that thigh, closing his eyes to think if he was really ready for more than they had already done, ready to do the final act. Kurt had been patient, had never pushed him to do anything he wasn't ready for. He had patiently explained how things worked, had given him his pamphlets his father had given him. They had made discoveries together. If the pamphlets were a brief, only-physical outline of how parts fit together, their days of exploring were things he had never on earth felt he would experience. But for this, he was scared. Really, truly scared. He did not do well with pain, and he was afraid he would scream or have a spell because he would feel pressured - no matter how gently Kurt did it. But, he had always known he would do it one day and he knew no other way to prepare himself for it.

 

Kurt pulled him back up, worried because he knew Blaine was hesitating at a point he was usually unstoppable. Something was wrong.

 

“Tell me, baby, tell me what's wrong. We don't have to do this, you know,” Kurt whispered.

 

“I was just thinking...I'm sorry, Kurt . It isn't that I don't want you, it isn't that I don't want to do it, I'm just plain scared.”

 

“It's okay, We can stop, or we can just do a little then stop. Anytime you want, it's in your control. Okay?” Kurt asked, wanting it so bad, but afraid to push Blaine.

 

“Take off my pajamas, okay?” he asked, turning off the bedside lamp. Kurt took off Blaine's pajamas as requested, then just lay close to him, their skin touching from lips to toes, just touching, nothing else.

 

Their emotions were too close to the surface, it was too much to lie still, so they began to stroke and rub, kiss and lick, paying attention to every bit of skin, learning each other all over again. They whispered softly to each other, comforting things, loving things, until their hearts were singing and they couldn't get close enough – tugging to be in the same space at the same time. Blaine finally could not contain that longing anymore, and he took the little bottle of lubrication, buttering his fingers and stroking Kurt until he was gasping for breath, urging Blaine to give him more and Blaine slipped a finger in where he had never dared venture before.

The moan and sigh that Kurt gave him back shook him to the core, never dreaming such a thing could be so sensual. His hand trembled and Kurt stroked his arm, calming him as he asked for more. Two fingers and Kurt was almost screaming his name, the fire in his belly burning so hot he had to find a way to either make it hotter or put it out.

 

Kurt was hardly able to articulate anything but moaning, but he was able to tell Blaine not to stop, and Blaine didn't. He kept the steady rhythm, his breath hitching as he thought about what he was going to do next, what he had to hurry and do before he lost his nerve...he had added a third finger, Kurt backing up to get more and Blaine slowing down so he didn't hurt the boy he loved. Kurt gently pulled his hand back, turning in his arms to struggle to find the little bottle, and took some into his own hand, stroking it onto Blaine thickly as he pumped his hand up and down, so that Blaine had to stop him or he wouldn't be able to control himself.

 

He stilled Kurt's hands and placed him on his knees and hands, kneeling behind him and leaning over Kurt's back, kissing him on his neck and gasping in surprise as Kurt bumped back into him, eager for the next thing to begin. He was trembling and Blaine was a little afraid, but he took himself in his hand and found the right position and pushed gently, The noise that tore out of Kurt's throat really scared him until he realized it was a lustful sound, a longing for Blaine to be inside of him, not a scared or pain filled cry. He pressed more, trying to be gentle in an activity that was not gentle, could never be accomplished in a gentle or soft manner. It required a certain roughness, a firm and strong action to get it done – and all the softness, the gentle and endearing parts had no place in this. So he gathered his courage, hearing Kurt's moans and begging for him to be inside him right now...and he shoved with all his might. Kurt screamed. Blaine froze. But after a tense moment, Kurt was panting, pushing back and wanting him to move. Blaine was out of the frozen fear and could only feel the velvet soft tightness, the warmth sinking into his body as the good feeling he had never imagined began to permeate his skin, his muscles, his brain. Oh, this was good, it was more than Blaine had ever dreamed and Kurt's calling him, begging for more...he knew it would only last a few moments, but he would remember it the rest of his life.

 

Blaine reached over Kurt's back, one arm holding his belly and the other stroking him, _stroking him_ , _**stroking him**_...to the rhythm their bodied synchronized and Blaine participated without conscious thought because his mind was fully occupied with thrusting and listening to Kurt as he fell apart. 'Oh, Blaine...oh...there, _there_ , _**there**_...oh..” nonsense things that came out of his mouth without permission, without thought until he stiffened, and Blaine could feel it in the way Kurt's belly was taut with strained muscles and then the breath he let go in ecstasy and Kurt came over and over, overwhelming Blaine whose body followed his love into that climax and they came down, Blaine finally falling on Kurt's back, resting for a while before he could pull back and then lie beside him, watching as Kurt's breathing returned to normal.

 

There were no words to say, nothing to do that could end this, so they just lay in the bed together, arms comforting, breathing the only sound. Kisses when their breath was easy again. Closed eyes. They stayed together like that for over an hour before getting up to take a shower and putting clean sheets on the bed. They fell asleep, tangled together as always, and didn't wake up until Cooper knocked on their door the next afternoon.


	5. The Birthday Party

 

Once again, Blaine was wedged in between Kurt and Cooper in an airplane, on his way home to Lima. He was a different person coming home than he had been going to New York, as though the city itself had waved it's magic wand and changed him. He had reached a new level of loving his angel, Kurt, whom he adored more each day. Blaine knew how lucky he was to have him and he had vowed as his new year's resolution to make Kurt more aware of it. Well, not to the point of annoyance, but a little thing here and there to let him know he was appreciated.

 

The other thing was that he was no longer the son of those monsters that had imprisoned him. No. He was Cooper Anderson's son, Cooper Anderson the New York attorney that had tried cases all over New York, but had taken a leave of absence from his firm to work in Ohio for the next year so he could be with Blaine until he graduated and went to college in New York. 

 

But with that little in his paradigm, as happy as it made him, came with it's own little bit of a problem. If Cooper was his father, who was his mother? All he knew was that she had been just a little older than his dad, seventeen Cooper thought, and let a twelve year old child impregnate her. Wow. 

Blaine could not wrap his mind around that one. Was it deliberate? And if so, why had she given him to his grandparents...in exchange for money? Cooper hadn't been very clear about the details of that, but Blaine thought it was because he just didn't know. As soon as Sasha told the Andersons, she had been whisked away and separated from Coop. Blaine didn't know if Coop had ever even seen her again.

 

He must have liked her, though. Blaine could see when he had asked about her, the look in Cooper's eyes as though he still thought about her all these years later. Blaine didn't know if he wanted to meet her. He would have liked to think she loved him enough to keep him, but who knows what really happened? Would it hurt Cooper if Blaine went to meet her? He didn't know. There was just too much in question now, and he had no idea how to deal with all of it.

 

He knew that both Cooper and Kurt were aware he was awake, though he hadn't opened his eyes since they sat down and put on the seatbelts. So, he opened his eyes to find Kurt staring at him, looking worried. He smiled at Kurt, snuggled into his side a bit closer, then smiled over at Cooper, too. He hated the small, confined space of the airplane, and knew Coop had upgraded their tickets so there would be more room, but it was still hard. Blaine had taken the anti-anxiety medication his doctor prescribed for the flight, and it made him sleepy, but he still felt the hot pressure of confinement, the fear building, and he hoped Cooper might sing to him again like he had on the way there. He tried to keep the trembling from his hands, but Cooper finally took them, looking at Kurt for permission and pulled Blaine closer to his own chest. He put the blanket provided by the airlines around Blaine and leaned close to sing “Hush, Little Baby” in his ear. Blaine closed his eyes once again and fell asleep, snuggled on Cooper's chest.

 

 

Puck and Finn were waiting at the airport to take them home, plenty of hugging and high fives as they walked to the parking lot, everyone chatting at once. Kurt enthused about all the things he had seen and Blaine just sat back and watched this boy he loved because watching Kurt when he was this happy was just about his favorite thing.

 

 

Driving up to the house, Kurt noticed there were quite a few cars parked in the neighborhood, and a lot of them looked familiar. He had a sneaking suspicion that they had a surprise for him inside, and he wasn't disappointed because he opened the door to find all of his friends shouting “Happy Birthday!” as he walked in. Tears gathered in his eyes, but they were tears of happiness as one after another of the people came to hug him and pull him in to the family room amongst joyous laughter and shouting.

 

Brittany came and threw her arms around Kurt, kissing him on the cheek and telling him she had toasted him at the New Year's party. Her congratulatory hugs were followed by a rib-cracking hug from Santana, who stuck her tongue in his ear just to hear him squeal, her deep throaty laugh at his discomfort making him love her all the more, despite his outward disapproval. 

Mercedes cornered him next, grinning as she practically picked him up off his feet in her exuberant hug, kissing his cheek several times. Sam, Mike, Tina, even Rachel were there to welcome him home. He chanced to look over at Blaine for a moment between hugs and saw that his boyfriend was ducking his head in the shy way he had when there were a lot of people, but he had a smile on his face that reached his eyes and Kurt smiled back at him. He suspected Blaine had known about this party well ahead of time.

 

Carole had made a cake and Kurt blew out the seventeen candles, thinking of a wish he wanted fulfilled. It was a wish that had been in his thoughts for a long time, and his cheeks reddened as the blush bloomed across his face, making Blaine blush as well. Someone else saw the wish in Kurt's eyes and how Blaine had reacted to it, and so Santana grabbed Blaine's hand in understanding. She slipped an arm around his shoulders as she felt him tremble a little. Puck saw and shifted quietly closer and placed an arm around Blaine's waist to pull him a little closer and give him a quick whisper in his ear. 

 

Cooper was watching this exchange and felt two things – each diametrically opposed to the other: first was a pain in his heart as he realized Blaine had a support system of caring friends that were looking out for him, even during something as joyous as a party. He was jealous, and guilty with that jealousy because he knew he had not been there for his son when he needed him. The other was an amazing elation of spirit, knowing these people loved Blaine and would look out for him, would be there to protect him when he needed them, and Cooper was grateful in his heart for them. He sighed, sitting on the outskirts of this group of friends, wishing he had had friends like this when he was low in spirit and missing Blaine when he was at boarding school.

 

Cooper was beginning to feel overwhelmed, so with a last glance to be sure his son was okay, he wandered into the kitchen to get away from the crowd for a breath of air. He sat on a stool at the counter and was surprised to feel an arm suddenly around his waist, hugging him. He turned to see the bright brown eyes of Puck's grandmother, Sophia, looking in to his eyes. 

 

“You are worried about your brother?” she said, actually more a statement than a question. 

 

“Yes, ma'am, nothing gets past you, does it?” he said, feeling a bit less alone with her arm around him. “But there's something I need to tell you, maybe later,” he mentioned.

 

“We can go now, out on the covered porch, while everyone is busy in here, if you wish,” she said, understanding that he was quite upset. She liked Cooper a lot since getting to know him after Blaine's rescue last year. He was a kind and generous person and obviously loved his little brother.

 

“I don't want to take you away from the party,” he smiled at her.

 

“Nonsense, Cooper. I've seen enough birthday parties in my day, let's go out there, I have just poured us cups of hot chocolate and we can enjoy them in peace,” she told him, reaching for the cups on the counter. Cooper followed her, holding the door and settling down in a chair as Sophia sat across from him. They put their cups on the table and Cooper got up to get her shawl. He had seen it on a chair in the kitchen, and he brought it back to wrap around her shoulders before sitting down again.

 

“Tell me what's put such a sad face on you today, Cooper. Did everything go as planned in New York? I know the boys were thrilled to go,” she asked, smiling at Cooper. He brushed his hair out of his eyes. It was curly, though not as curly as Blaine's, and he had eyes just as intense as Blaine's, but a royal blue in color. The two looked a lot alike, but there were subtle differences. While Blaine had the capacity to show pure, innocent joy at times, Cooper's demeanor was always clouded with that touch of melancholy that never left him, even in his sleep. Sophia had known such people, mostly ones who were so damaged as children that the pain never left them, even years after it had stopped. It had made her wonder – if the Andersons were capable of imprisoning Blaine, what might they have done to Cooper?

 

Cooper just sat for a few minutes, gathering his thoughts. How was he to tell people the truth now? How would it affect Blaine? He was reluctant to tell anyone before talking to Blaine and finding out how he wanted to tell their story. But this was Sophia, and he knew she wouldn't tell anyone if he asked that of her. And it would be good to get her views on how to deal with the situation as a whole. 

 

“Ah, I need this to be confidential,” he said. Sophia nodded and moved to sit next to him, taking his hand in hers. Cooper's hands were large with blunt tips and manicured nails, tanned from being in the sun, even in December. Sophia's were very tiny, almost lost in Cooper's, and had the paper thin skin of someone of her advanced age. There were many scars and she wore several rings with diamonds or sapphires in them, making her hands look even tinier. In spite of the appearance of frailty, Sophia's hands were sturdy: a lifetime of kneading bread and milking cows, holding babies and digging gardens had made them strong in spite of the arthritis that twisted them into painful shapes these days.

 

“Blaine isn't my brother,” he said, looking at the old woman, worried she wouldn't believe him.

 

“Okay,” she patted his hand, but didn't inquire more, she knew he would tell her when he was ready.

 

“He's my son,” Cooper said next. If Sophia was shocked, she didn't show it. She smiled at Cooper, as if this was wonderful news. He was surprised at her reaction, expecting her to be incredulous. But, then, Sophia was over 90 and had probably heard just about everything in her lifetime. He was encouraged to continue and found himself telling her the whole story, from the first days of falling in love with Sasha to the trip home from New York. He confessed how scared he was to find how he and Blaine would continue in their lives with this information. 

She had held his hand, murmured encouragement and sorrow during his story, even giving him a kiss on the cheek as he told her his heartbreak of having to leave Blaine behind when he went to boarding school. Tears rolled down her old cheeks when he told her how his parents had told him Blaine died in a skiing accident in Switzerland when he was in law school in their attempt to hide what had really happened to Blaine.

 

“Oh, Cooper, my dear, dear boy. How you have suffered. But you know, you and Blaine are still young, you have long lives ahead of you. You cannot erase what has transpired in your past, but you can make your future a better place. Now that you know the truth, and have shared it with Blaine, you can grow together. You don't have to do everything at once, you can take baby steps. I think this will be good for both of you now, to have time to heal in a place where you are both surrounded by people that love you. 

"The Hummels are a family to you and Blaine, and I think you'll find that they will be the strongest support system you can imagine. And you know I will always be there for you,” Sophia told him, and Cooper broke down and cried into her shoulder. 

 

“Thank you, Miss Sophia, thank you,” he sniffed.

 

Sophia took Cooper by the chin and lifted his head. She took the end of her shawl and dried his eyes. “Let's not have any more tears today, okay? You are with your son now, and for that you should be happy, right?”

 

“Yes, and I am so grateful after all we've been through. Thank you,” he smiled back at her, offering her his arm to take so they could rejoin the party.

 

 

Back inside, music was playing and all of them were singing and dancing in the family room and the kitchen, talking and smiling and everyone was so glad to be there having such a great time. Britt was dancing with Santana, Lauren with Puck, Mike and Tina, Finn and Rachel, Artie and Sugar, even Carole and Burt were doing a few hesitant steps, laughing together as they watched Kurt and Blaine slow dance to a fast song as though they had a whole different song playing in their heads just for themselves. Kurt saw Sophia standing with Cooper and went to give her a hug. 

 

“Dance with me, Gramma Sofie?” he asked.

 

“I can't dance that way, Kurt, I'm too old. I only know how to dance the old dances from my childhood,” she said.

 

Blaine smiled. “I can play the music for them!” and he went to the piano and began to play a Polish folk tune he had memorized to please Sophia last year. She loved the attention and was soon showing all the teenagers how to do the chodzony, a slower dance she learned as a child. When she got tired, she asked Santana to show them a Mexican dance which everyone was shocked to find out she knew. This was followed by many others, Mike helping with all of them as he was so well versed in any kind of dance. Burt was even called upon to show them a simple Irish jig he had learned from Kurt's mother's aunt. By the time the party was over, everyone was laughing and smiling and tired from the dancing. They all thanked the Hummel family for all their hospitality and Kurt hugged everyone goodbye.

 

Soon it was just Puck, Santana, Lauren, Kurt, and Blaine all sitting in the family room as they had done in the first days of Blaine's freedom. Brittany was there, too, but she was sound asleep on the sofa, a blanket lovingly tucked around her by Santana. 

 

“And here we are again, the partners in crime so to speak. We've come a long way since that day, haven't we?” Kurt smiled at each of his friends as they smiled back.

 

“Tell us about the trip to New York!” 

 

 

"We will, so many things happened, but I think it's a tale for another night,” Kurt told them. 

 

“There is another story to tell you about my life, but honestly, I'm too tired to do it now. Maybe we can get together sometime in the next week and I can tell you then?” Blaine asked, dark circles under his eyes letting them know how tired he really was.

 

“We need to be on our way, it is late. Santana, I think if Puck can carry Brittany out to my car we will give you two a ride home, okay?” Lauren said, her arms around Puck. 

 

“Thank you,” Santana said, and Kurt looked over at her, not used to hearing such nice things come out of her mouth. He smiled, which embarrassed her.

 

“Happy Birthday, Pretty Pony, I'm glad you're back,” she said, “And you, too, Hobbit.” Blaine and Kurt both grinned at her, glad to hear she was back to her own snarky self.

 

There were good nights and welcome backs all around as the boys walked their guests to the cars.

 

 

“We are sure blessed with good friends,” Blaine observed and they went down the stairs to their bed. In the past year, they had stopped trying to fool anyone and just slept in the same bed. Burt had not been happy about it, but the third week of being woken up with Blaine screaming in fright during a nightmare until Kurt was able to wake up enough to get a light on and walk over to the other bed and comfort Blaine, he decided to just let Kurt sleep in the same bed. He asked the boys to respect his wishes concerning their intimacy, and he left it at that. What he didn't know wouldn't hurt him. He had given both boys 'the talk', separately to keep the embarrassment at a minimum, but that didn't happen – they were all terribly embarrassed with it all. He did it, though and felt better for having done so.

 

 

Kurt walked into his room, sitting on the bed for a moment to gather himself.

 

“I'll get out our pajamas,” Blaine offered, “then we could take a shower together if you want?”

 

“I'm pretty tired, that sounds good. I changed the linen before we left, so it's clean and we can just jump in bed after,” Kurt smiled.

 

Blaine got out two sets of pajamas. He had liked Kurt's silk ones so much, Kurt had gotten him several pairs for Christmas, so there were Kurt's blue ones and Blaine's purple ones. He took off his clothes, covered from the dust of the airport and the long taxi ride this morning, and put them into the hamper with Kurt's. They would have to do laundry tomorrow. He padded into the bathroom, suddenly so tired he could hardly keep his eyes open.

 

Kurt had the shower on already and Blaine stepped in, holding on to Kurt's hand as he tried to keep his balance. Kurt brought him in close, so they could share the spray of water and get wet all over. 

 

“You look so tired, baby, let me wash your hair, okay?” Kurt asked, and Blaine closed his eyes as Kurt's fingers massaged the shampoo into his scalp, rubbing away all the gel and dust from the streets of New York. He rinsed Blaine's hair under the spray and washed it again, carding his fingers through the soft, silky curls and Blaine sighed in contentment. He loved it when Kurt washed his hair. Kurt pulled him closer, so his back was touching Kurt's chest and then brought his hands around to wash Blaine's chest. Kurt used Dove soap, the pink kind that he said reminded him of his mother. He rubbed it on a washcloth and then gently washed Blaine's chest and arms, turning him to wash his back and backside, down his legs. Covered in slick soap, Kurt put his arms around Blaine and moved their bodies together, just to feel each other and Blaine giggled at the ticklish feeling it caused. 

 

Blaine reached up to wash Kurt's hair, but he took Blaine's hands in his own, “It's okay, I washed it before you got in. This is about you right now, baby. You are so tired, let's rinse off and get into bed,” Kurt told his boyfriend, kissing him on the neck as he put his arms back around him.

 

Kurt got out first, helping Blaine out and wrapping him in a fluffy white towel and patting him dry before doing the same for himself. They dressed in the silk pajamas and got into bed, turning off the bedside lamp before cuddling under the blankets, warm in their nest. 

 

“Big or little?” Kurt asked.

 

“Can I be the little spoon tonight?” Blaine whispered. He liked being the big spoon most nights, being more comfortable when he felt in control, but tonight he just wanted to feel safe in Kurt's arms. Too many things had happened in the past week and he was feeling very vulnerable and Kurt was the one person he always felt safe with.

 

“Of course, baby. C'mere,” Kurt cooed, holding out his arms as Blaine turned over to place his back against Kurt's chest, then lay back to feel Kurt card his fingers through Blaine's curls once again. It was calming and felt so good, he sighed and closed his eyes. Kurt's hand came around his waist, settling so it cupped his belly and rubbed gently as Kurt hummed Toora Loora Loora and Blaine fell asleep, knowing he was loved.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Several hours later, closer to dawn, Kurt was sleeping lightly when he heard Blaine's breath catch, then a quiet sobbing sound started and Blaine was trembling. 

“Hey, honey, it's okay. I'm here,” Kurt rubbed Blaine's back, his arms and the back of his neck. Blaine caught his breath loudly and snuffled, quieting as he fell back asleep, nightmare averted. Kurt fell back asleep, he was so used to this he had hardly even woken up this time. But a while later it was back, a snuffling that worked its way into crying and verged on screaming before Kurt turned Blaine in his arms and tried to calm him. 

 

“Wake up, Blaine. It's okay, baby, it's okay. I have you. I have you....” he whispered into Blaine's ear, kissing his cheek, his jaw, stroking his arms. But Blaine continued to fuss, now throwing his arms a little in an attempt to get away from his dream demons. He was strong and when he had this kind of night terror, he had been known to strike out. A few times Kurt had ended up with bruises when he had failed to wake Blaine up enough for him to know where he was. This was working into one of those nights and Kurt thought about calling Cooper or Finn to help. He didn't like to call his dad, both because of his dad's health and because Blaine was sometimes still afraid of him and that made things worse. 

 

“Blaine, honey, it's me, it's Kurt. Wake up, you're okay,” he soothed, but Blaine was full out crying now. Kurt tried one more time to pull Blaine close and comfort him or wake him up, but to no avail. He grabbed his cell from beside the bed and dialed Coop's number.

 

“It's okay, Kurt” he heard Cooper's voice. He could tell Cooper wasn't asleep, which probably meant Blaine had woken him up, too. “I'm on my way.”

 

Kurt held on to Blaine, just waiting for Cooper to get there, and he was in just a few moments.

 

“Bee, it's okay, I'm here. Settle down, you're safe. Kurt and I are here with you,” Cooper said in a calm voice, taking Blaine's body from Kurt and holding him in his lap with his strong arms. Kurt went into the bathroom and returned with a warm washcloth, which he folded and placed on Blaine's forehead. That would sometimes wake him up a little faster, and it seemed to help tonight. 

 

“Kuuuurt? Coooooper?” Blaine whined, blinking his eyes. He looked puzzled. 

 

“It's okay, Squirt, we're here,” Cooper said, stroking down from his temple to his cheek in gentle rhythm. Blaine shook his head a little, looking up with sad eyes when he realized he had probably woken them up with another nightmare. 

 

“Oh, Cooper, I'm so sorry. I guess I woke you up. Where's Kurt?” he looked around, spotting Kurt on the far side of the bed, looking anxious. He hated it when Kurt looked like that, mainly because he knew it was his fault. He brushed a tear from his eye.

 

“Don't cry, baby, we're here for you. It's okay,” Kurt soothed. He moved closer to Cooper, his hand on Coop's shoulder to steady him as he got closer to Blaine. 

 

“I must have been having a nightmare,” Blaine said.

 

“Yeah, but we're here. Can I get you something to drink?” Kurt asked.

 

“Some warm milk? If it's no trouble,” Blaine said, his eyes blinking shut again. Cooper let him lie down on the bed again and got up, holding his hand to stop Kurt.

 

“I'll go get it. Do you want anything?” Cooper asked.

 

“Just some of the same, thank you,” he said, grasping Cooper's hand and squeezing it for a moment. He smiled up at Cooper and Coop was warmed by that, glad he was able to do something for Kurt because he felt he owed him more than he could ever repay. 

 


	6. Walk Through the Past

 

Bright and early the next morning, Blaine and Kurt were on the phone to their friends to ask if they wanted to come and look at the mansion. Everyone agreed. Kurt and Blaine had gotten home from New York on Thursday, the first of January, and had Kurt's party. Today was Friday, and they had the whole weekend before they had to be back at school on Monday morning. Plenty of time to search through the mansion and decide what they wanted to do with it.

 

Puck had gone to pick up Santana, Lauren met them in her car, and Kurt had also asked Brittany to come along. Cooper was coming, but both Burt and Carole declined. They had a football game to watch later and didn't want to interfere. Strangely enough, Finn didn't seem interested in the game, but hung around Kurt and Blaine, asking about the house. 

 

“Do you want to come with us, Finn?” Cooper asked, not wanting the boy to feel left out. Finn's eyes lit up. He had, of course, heard the story of how Blaine had been imprisoned in the attic room and how Kurt, Puck, and Santana had rescued him. But he had always felt a little left out of it all. 

 

When everyone was there, they piled in two cars and left. Driving to the mansion took a while, and Blaine felt funny, a bit more apprehensive as the miles swept by. Kurt saw it in his face and sought out his hand, which he held resting on the console. Santana saw it, too, and leaned forward in her seat, putting an arm around Blaine's chest, He looked back at her and smiled. It was always a wonder to him that the girl was so free with him, so willing to offer him comfort, especially after he came to know her at McKinley where she was haughty and snippy with everyone – her sarcasm only second to Kurt's own in the hallways of the bully-infested school. 

 

Cooper stopped at the gates of his old home, a catch in his breath as he got out to unlock the gate. They had chained the gate shut last summer when he had come to clean out the kitchen and such, ready for it to be vacant until the trial of his parents was over. It was all over now, Mr and Mrs Anderson were in prison, probably for the rest of their lives. Now Cooper and Blaine owned the mansion and all the grounds, and they needed to decide what to do with it. He got back in his car and drove to the front door.

 

Santana, Brittany, Blaine, and Kurt got out of the Navigator and walked over to meet Cooper, Puck, and Lauren. Cooper produced the key and they all went in the front door of the mansion. 

 

“We can start at the top of the house and work our way down?” Kurt asked.

 

They trooped up, coming first to the library. 

 

“Can I see the passage?” Finn asked and Blaine nodded, showing him how to work the sconce to open the secret panel. Santana took Britt by the hand and they walked with Finn, Puck, and Lauren down the stairs, flashlight in hand, to see the passage.

 

Cooper, Kurt, and Blaine walked down the hallway to the room where Blaine was imprisoned. He opened the door, no longer locked, and walked in, Kurt holding him tight when he started to shake.

 

“Do you want to leave?” Cooper asked, seeing his son in such distress. 

 

“No. I want to see it. I think it won't be so scary if I see it again,” Blaine said.

 

They walked in, Cooper's hand on Blaine's back and Kurt holding Blaine's hand. Blaine looked at the walls, the days he had marked – over 1500 marks – showing how long he had been there. He looked at the old velvet chair, and the ancient mattress where he had slept, summer hot and winter cold. It all seemed almost like it had happened to someone else, like it had been a movie he had watched. 

Cooper was looking, too, but his memories were very different. He spent many summer days in this room, running his fingers through Sasha's long red hair. He'd kissed her for the first time, sitting and looking through that very window, sitting in the blue velvet chair as they dressed up in costumes they found in the trunk.

 

Cooper was lost in his thoughts: that mattress. It was there that Blaine had been conceived. He hadn't even really understood what could happen in any real way. He was only twelve that summer and was so curious, and so in love with Sasha and her long red hair. He sighed, which made Blaine look at him, suddenly realizing that this must be where he met with Sasha. This must be the place he was conceived. 

Wow. He didn't even know how to think about that. He turned, suddenly overwhelmed with that information, and buried his face in Kurt's neck. Kurt's arms automatically went around him, holding him with so much strength that Blaine was comforted, realizing Kurt would always be there for him.

 

Feeling a little better, Blaine smiled at Kurt and moved towards Cooper, Kurt nodding at him in encouragement. He then nodded towards the door, indication that he was going to leave Blaine alone with Cooper. Blaine smiled in thanks, knowing without being told that Kurt would be just down the hall, providing them with privacy, but a shout away if Blaine needed to call to him.

 

“It's hard, isn't it, Coop?” Blaine said, moving next to his young father. 

 

“It's not something I've allowed myself to remember for a long time, Blaine. It was a whole summer, just her and I. My parents were never home, they just left me with a seventeen year old girl and a pocketful of money. What did they think would happen? We had to stay here, there was nowhere to go, nothing to do. We spent a lot of time in this room, Blaine,” Cooper said in a dream-like voice. 

 

“Did you love her, Cooper? Did you love my mother?” Blaine didn't want to ask, but he had to know. 

 

Cooper didn't even hesitate. “Yes, I did. I loved her with all my heart, Bee.” Coop didn't even notice the tears running down his face. Blaine's arms went around his father's neck, bringing him closer to whisper in his ear, “I love you, Cooper. I'm so glad you're my father.” Cooper hugged him back, basking in the love that poured out of his son, the love that had always been there even as a baby. Blaine's eyes had always sought out Cooper's eyes, making Coop feel that even though he couldn't say it to him, Blaine knew somewhere inside that Cooper was really his father.

 

 

They left the attic room, not sure what they would do with this room, but were unwilling to change it right now. They closed the door, determined to put it behind them for now. Their friends were waiting at the head of the stairs as they went to the second floor below them. Most of the rooms here were guest rooms and the boys' bedrooms. Blaine walked into his room, still holding Kurt's hand. They looked around, Kurt imagining what it was like for Blaine as a twelve year old child to be here. He had some music posters on his walls, a bright bedspread and matching curtains and rug. There was a desk on the wall that was covered with bookcases and several instrument cases on shelves. While it was quite outdated, Kurt could imagine how much of the room reflected Blaine's personality. He held his hand and squeezed a little tighter as he walked over to the far wall, looking at the photographs pinned to a cork board.

 

“Oh, most of those are my friends at Dalton...Wes, David, Nick, Jeff, Trent, and Sebastian. That was a party we had at the pool for my birthday that year. Then, this is my third birthday -and there I am, sitting on Cooper's lap while he helped me open my presents. The housekeeper took that picture.” Blaine had that far-away look in his eyes, remembering better days. He showed Kurt all the pictures, naming friends and some of the staff, even a picture of a parrot. “That old bird was over 60 years old, he belonged to my grandfather. He bit everyone, but he never once bit me. I kind of miss the grumpy old thing,” Blaine said.

 

“Well, you have Chloe!” Kurt reminded him. 

 

“Hey, maybe that's why I thought to make Chloe into a pet,” Blaine said, remembering how he wanted to tame the pigeon because he had read The Swiss Family Robinson and wanted to send a message for help.

 

Santana and Brittany walked into the bedroom, first looking at Blaine for permission. He swept his hand in a welcoming gesture and they came over, looking at the photos.

 

“Aww..Cooper was so cute!” Brittany cooed, pointing a the picture of Coop on his hands and knees, tiny Blaine sitting on his back, wearing a small cowboy hat and smiling. Kurt smiled, too. 

 

“Let's catch up with Cooper...” Blaine said, pulling Kurt along by the hand as he was suddenly too overcome with memories to be in this room another minute. 

They walked happy to the next room, very similar to Blaine's but even more out of date, Cooper evident in the books and pictures on the walls. It was mostly photographs of Blaine as a baby, as a toddler, as a child. Cooper was sitting on his bed, having taken a drawer out of the dresser and turned it upside down to get a large envelope taped to the underside. It was open on the bed and Cooper had a photograph in his hands, holding it to his heart, tears slipping down his cheeks unchecked. 

 

Blaine went over to his father, taking the photo out of his hands and looking at it. There was a beautiful girl in the photo, long red hair in waves curling down her back and over her shoulders. She had dark emerald green eyes, with just a touch of reddish brown flecks in them, like sun dapples on forest moss. They were shaped exactly like Blaine's. Her plump pink lips, pursed as she tried to suppress a smile or a laugh, looked like Blaine's, too. Kurt's heart pounded as he recognized these features and if he had any doubt that Mrs Anderson was not Blaine's mother, this photograph dispelled it. Her cheeks were rosy with a summer tan, and she held her fingers up as if offering the tiny flowers she held to the camera. They were tiny violets, which were also strung through her hair. Around her neck was a gold chain with a heart-shaped locket nestled low on her chest, just above her breasts. She may or may not have been wearing a blouse, the picture showed no fabric but her hair was so thick and flowing it might be covering up any vestige of clothing. It was hard to determine a background, it was out of the camera's focus, but was probably the river, trees vaguely showing behind her.

 

“That's my mother, isn't it?” Blaine asked, but he already knew the answer. Cooper nodded, gathering Blaine close to him and touching his forehead to Blane's shoulder to hide his emotions. 

 

“Yes, Blaine. That's Sasha,” Cooper said.

 

“She's beautiful,” Blaine whispered, afraid to say it aloud. 

 

“Yes, Bee, she was that.”

 

The rest of the friends had caught up by now and everyone looked at the picture of the girl with red-gold hair, seeing the resemblance between her and Blaine. 

 

Brittany looked at the picture and whispered to Santana, so loud the whole room heard her: “That's Blaine's mom, right?” Santana nodded. “Is she dead? Is that why nobody is saying anything?”

 

“No, Britt,” Cooper answered before Santana could reply, “She's still alive. She tried to contact my parents a few years ago, that was the catalyst for them locking Blaine up.” 

 

Everyone looked at Blaine, Kurt squeezing his hand.

 

“Did you see her, Cooper?” Blaine asked.

 

“No. I haven't seen or heard from her since I was twelve and she went with my parents to have Blaine. I hardly spoke to her after I learned she was pregnant, only to tell her I loved her and I'd take care of the baby the best I could. And we decided to name him 'Blaine'. My parents named him 'Joshua', but for some reason my father listened to me and gave him Blaine as a middle name.”

 

“Where is she now?” Lauren asked.

 

“I don't know,” Cooper said. 

 

 

Downstairs in the office, Cooper and Blaine sat looking through the desk. Cooper had already taken most of the paperwork to his office months ago, but the rest of the things not related to the house and the trial. Most of this would wait for another day, but they scanned through files. In a file marked 'Sasha', they found the letter. Cooper's mother told him that Sasha was trying to blackmail her, but Cooper found no evidence of that. The letter was just a plead to see Blaine. Just once, even if it was from a distance. Or even just a word of how Blaine was doing. Cooper passed the letter over to Blaine and watched him read it. He saw the raw emotion break Blaine's face, a sadness overcoming his son as he read the plea. 

 

“Cooper, I don't want to say the wrong thing here. What are you thinking?” Blaine asked his father. 

 

“I don't know. It's been a long time, maybe it's too late.”

 

“Was it too late for me to learn the truth about you? I don't think so,” Blaine told him, still a little worried. He wouldn't hurt Cooper for anything, but he just realized he wanted to meet his mother.

 

“Well, Blaine, I don't think it is. I'll call this number and see what I can find out,” Cooper agreed. He wanted to see Sasha by himself first, just to tell her the story before she met Blaine. The whole thing wasn't a story anyone would even believe maybe, so he wanted to tell her gently before she saw Blaine. He sighed and put the file in his case to take home. They went back to the chore of going through the files for a while longer before leaving it and going to find the rest of the group.

 

They found them in the music room. Blaine smiled when he walked in, this was always his favorite room in the house. His baby grand piano was there, dusty but not badly out of tune. He sat down and did a few scales, then started playing some songs they all knew. Finn started singing along with the next song “We Are Young”, which was close to everyone's heart. Finn put his arms around Santana, who was holding Britt. Kurt was holding Britt's hand and Puck was standing behind them, his arms around Lauren. Cooper walked in, a little in awe of how Blaine could bring a room full of people together like this. Kurt looked over and saw Cooper, so he let go of Britt and went over to put his arms around Cooper's shoulders, bringing him into the room and making him a part of the group. They were swaying into each other, smiling because they knew that no matter what happened to them in the future, they had all of these people that loved them. 

 

 

Everyone had a great time looking through the old house, Blaine explaining about how his ancestors had lived there, how things had changed over the years. He shared the story of his three times great grandfather, Nathaniel Anderson, and how he had helped in the Underground Railroad. It was getting on towards evening and they all decided to go to a restaurant for dinner, locking up the house and going to a Chinese restaurant in Westerville. It was late when they got home and they all decided to go to bed.

 

 

An hour after Kurt and Blaine were in bed, they were still awake. 

 

“What's wrong, Blaine?” Kurt asked, feeling his boyfriend was preoccupied the whole evening.

 

“Nothing. Everything. I don't know,” Blaine tried to say, but he was so confused about his feelings at that moment, he didn't even know how to answer.

 

Kurt pulled him close and put his arms around him, kissing his cheek.

 

“I understand, baby, I do. All of this is just so overwhelming, and you have had so many things thrown at you this week. Anyone would be confused. Can you say what the most confusing thing is? Or what has you so worried? You know I'm here for you and I can listen if that would help. But, if you feel you can't cope with saying it all aloud right now, I'm here just to hold you and kiss you,” Kurt told him, stroking Blaine's face, trailing his hand down Blaine's arm and then leaning in to give him a soft kiss on his lips. Blaine smiled back at Kurt, thankful that they were comfortable with just being quiet. He was trying to think of how to even name the confusion, much less organize it into a way he could talk about it. 

 

“It's just...seeing the mansion today was hard. Seeing the room. I wanted to burn down the whole house. But, telling all of our friends about Nathaniel and all the good he did in the house, how can I burn it? It's so full of history, it would be wrong to destroy that part of it.”

 

“I'll be right back, okay, baby?” Kurt asked, getting up to find his robe and throwing it on over his silk pajamas. Blaine nodded and Kurt left the room.

 

In a few minutes he was back, Cooper behind him, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he sat down on the bed next to Blaine. He didn't say anything, just held out his arms for Blaine, who leaned into Cooper and dissolved in tears. Kurt quietly started to walk out, but Blaine saw him and called him back.

 

“Don't go, Kurt. Please, I need you, too.” So Kurt sat down on the other side of Blaine.

 

“I know you're having issues about the mansion, aren't you, Bee?” Cooper asked. “I am, too.”

 

“I wanted to burn it, get rid of all the memories, but I know that wouldn't erase what happened there. And so much good happened there, too. What do you want to do with it?” Blaine asked.

 

“I don't think I want to live there right now. It's out of the way and as soon as you graduate, I'm moving back to New York. I have my law practice and I need to pay attention to that. Aren't both you and Kurt applying to colleges in New York?” Coop said.

 

“Yes, NYU, Tisch, Julliard, NYADA, Manhattan School of Music. It's everything we both want,” Blaine told his father. 

 

Well, then we agree it would not be in our best interest to move to the old place. As long as Burt is okay with you staying here until you graduate, I think it's the best thing, don't you?” Coop asked.

 

“Yes,” Kurt and Blaine said together.

 

“Then we have some options with the mansion. I don't want to sell it, do you?” Coop asked Blaine.

 

“No.”

 

“Then how about a charity? It has a lot of ground and it's big enough for offices or something if we can find the right one. Or we could make it into a museum? Like the one we visited in New York dedicated to the Holocaust?”

 

“I like that idea, but I don't think it would work. This is just too small of a community to support that kind of thing. The charity is better. Let's look into that, okay?” Blaine was actually looking excited – which was a good thing after the melancholy of the week. 

 

“Agreed. So, what else is bothering you?” Cooper wanted to know.

 

“I'm just trying to get used to you being my father. It was a shock, and I never told you this, but when I was little, I used to pretend you were my father.” Blaine sighed out, then laid his head on Cooper's chest. Cooper wiped a tear from his eye and hugged the son that had been stolen from him. 

 

“I'm glad, Bee. I loved you so much. I wish I'd have been able to tell you sooner. Now, let's get some sleep, we have a big day ahead of us, researching charities.” They all hugged and agreed to meet up in the morning to discuss which charities they wanted to investigate. 

 

“Good night, Kurt. Thanks for coming to get me,” Cooper whispered in Kurt's ear as he gave him one more hug before going back upstairs to his bed in the guest room. 

 

 

“Feel any better?” Kurt asked, Blaine nodded. 

 

“I want to meet with my mother,” Blaine said to Kurt, then looked away, overcome with emotion.

 

“Oh, baby, I don't think that's a good idea. She is in prison where she belongs and it was so hard on you at her trial. I will support you if you want to go, but I really advise you no to,” Kurt said in a very worried voice.

 

“No, not her. I want to meet my real mother, I want to meet Sasha. I don't want to stir up old feelings for Cooper, but I do want to meet her, even if it's only once,” Blaine said, nuzzling into Kurt's neck for comfort. Kurt was more than willing to provide any comfort Blane needed and began to stroke his back, rubbing little circles as he thought about this new problem. Would it be good for Blaine or cause more heartache?

 

“Kurt, if you could see your mom one more time, just for a day, wouldn't you move heaven and earth to do so?” Blaine asked, trying to keep the desperation from his voice but failing. 

 

Kurt thought about it, and yes, he would. It might be painful, for Blaine and Cooper both, but Kurt believed Blaine had the right to meet her.

 

“Okay. I can ask Lauren to find her for you. Is that what you want?” Kurt asked.

 

“Yeah. If I can do it without telling Cooper the first time I meet her, that would be better. I don't want to hurt him,” Blaine confessed. 

 

“Okay, we'll call her in the morning. Now, let's get some sleep.”

 

 

Of course they didn't go right to sleep. Comforting strokes on Blaine's back became strokes in other places, the boys kissing and touching as they lay down together under the covers, warm in their blanket nest as they explored and moaned their pleasure into the night.

 


	7. Meeting Sasha

Carole sat in the quiet house, a cup of hot coffee in her hand. It was cool in the house, so she wore a sweater over her silk blouse and jeans, thick socks and leather loafers on her feet. There was a time she would have been wearing one of Finn's old T-shirts with a band name printed on the front. There would be sweat pants and sneakers, too, but her step son, Kurt, had been a big influence in her life after she married Burt. He gently coaxed her to buy better clothes and dress like a lady – which left her feeling better about herself. He had made suggestions like instead of her hair just pulled into a ponytail like an overage teen, that she get it cut in a shorter style that complimented her facial structure, bringing out her cheek bones and bright eyes. She might have been reluctant at first, but she found Kurt's suggestions made her feel better about herself.

Of course, it wasn't just her outside appearance that had changed since she married Burt. It seemed like everything about her had changed. She was more open to new thoughts, perhaps more tolerant? She had thought of herself as tolerant before, but now with all the issues and problems she had come face to face with, she felt she was different inside. First, there was learning about Kurt, how he'd been bullied, how a boy that seemed to be so cold had a heart of gold that he hid from the world. And there was her own son, Finn. He was always kind of a goofy kid, always happy and never seeing the bad in people. She had been shocked to learn that he had once been one of Kurt's tormentors. Finn couldn't deny his heart, and he had tried to help the underdog, even when he was in the midst of the bullies dumping kids like Kurt into dumpsters – Kurt told her that Finn had made the others hold his books and let him take off his designer jacket before dumping him.

That didn't excuse his behavior, but he learned from it. He was just a misunderstood kid that needed to lean some hard lessons and Carole thought he had learned them well. She was proud of who Finn was becoming.

 

Then there was Blaine, who the Hummels had welcomed with open arms. He had been through something that would break most adults, and he came through with his heart intact in spite of all the abuse and neglect. But it was not without scars and it was not without help. Actually, it was Blaine and his situation that had made Carole go back to school. She was a registered nurse, but she wanted more, she wanted to help troubled kids. Some had very obvious hurts, like Blaine and his PTSD. Some of these beautiful kids had trouble that wasn't seen on the surface, and so many needed a guiding hand. Puck, Brittany, Santana...... they all had baggage that kids didn't seem to have when she was that age. She wanted to be that guiding hand.

 

Carole was going to be late to work if she didn't get going...the kids weren't going to school today, it was Sunday, but she had to be at the hospital to start her shift in half an hour. Just as she was putting on her coat, Burt walked down the stairs, ready for breakfast after his shower. He had to be at the garage in an hour. They kissed at the door as Carole was getting ready to leave, Burt pulling her close to kiss her soft lips and tell her that he loved her and he'd catch up with her at lunch time, they could get a bite to eat in the hospital cafeteria. It was less than two minutes they spent together, but it was these little things that made Carole love Burt. She knew that she was lucky to have Burt in her life, and she walked to her car to scrape the windows with a spring in her step.

 

* * *

 

Sophia was tired. Well, she was tired every day, but more so today than most. Kurt had come to visit with her for a little while yesterday, bringing her scones he had made himself and they sat and drank tea together. She loved this boy, Kurt, who always knew more than he was telling. He had an ice-cold demeanor when he wanted to, but she could see straight through that to his heart.

She thought about what Kurt had done for Blaine, that poor boy with the wild curly hair and golden hazel eyes. The one that looked so much like her brother, Hans, gone these past 70 years. Blaine had the lighthearted laugh that was so like her brother's, but Blaine was broken in a way Hans never was, and Sophia was not optimistic about his chances for recovery at first. Then she met Kurt.

 

Kurt was an enigma. A puzzle. She had rarely met anyone so determined, and at such a young age. He was devoted to Blaine in a way Sophia could only marvel at. She had seen Blaine in the throes of one of his spells, when he was rolled up in a ball screaming away the demons and nobody could reach him. Then Kurt would arrive, and the room would get quiet, Blaine would be listening instead of raving. A soft touch, a tender kiss, and Blaine would be in Kurt's arms, letting him take the demons away. She wished she had been blessed with just such an angel when she was young and afraid.

 

Kurt had told her yesterday about the museum of the Holocaust he had visited in New York. Sophia didn't mention it to him, but she had been to that place years ago, and she was glad he had gone. It was important for young people to know the mistakes of the past so they wouldn't repeat them. Of course, Kurt had known about the death camps before. The first day she met him, he had seen her tattoo, the one she got in Auschwitz, and she knew by the look in his eyes that he knew what it meant. But, bless his soul, he hadn't said anything to her or the other young people gathered at her table, he had just given her a heartwarming smile. He was a special young man, and no wonder: he was Burt Hummel's boy.

 

She remembered when Burt was a boy himself. She had been recently widowed and was having a hard time. Burt had shown up one morning and mowed her lawn, no questions asked, no money exchanged hands. She had offered what little she could afford, but he wouldn't take it. After that, she would make him gingerbread or oatmeal cookies. Some days she would open her door to get her newspaper and find a box of groceries on her porch. Her walks would be cleared in the winter. She loved the shy boy that Burt was, and she loved the man he became: to come out of the tragedy of his wife's sudden death and still be a father to Kurt, to raise such a loving and caring boy in spite of all the world threw at them, Burt was one in a million. It made Sophia optimistic that things would be okay with people like that left in this world.

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

Cooper was sitting at the desk in his office in Columbus. He hadn't needed to come to work today, it was Sunday, but he craved the solitude the empty office would give him. He had struggled with this question for so long, he didn't even know how long it had been. He hadn't seen Sasha since he was twelve, on that fateful day she told his parents she was pregnant and it was Cooper's child.

He remembered the thrill that had come first, the absolute joy. It didn't last long as the fear crept into him, seeing the faces of his parents close to him, seeing the disappointment in their demeanor. He had been afraid to look at Sasha in that moment, and he'd regretted that ever since. Was she happy? Just afraid? Did she want to give up his baby? There were just too many questions to answer and he had given up long ago wishing for those answers.

 

Now he was faced with a new problem. Well, it wasn't new, but the solutions open to him were different. Before, he had never found a way to contact her, though he had tried when he was younger. Her parents had moved, no forwarding address. He'd googled them and her, but to no avail. Now he had the letter she had sent to his parents, asking to see Blaine. All he had to do was call.

 

He had taken enough time to go over this again and again in his brain. He was done with hesitating. He picked up the phone and, looking a the paper in front of him, dialed.

 

“Hello?” a voice said. He had been worried that she would have moved on, not have the same number, any number of things...but it was her voice. The voice he had dreamed about for so many years.

 

“Sasha?” Cooper said, his voice shaking.

 

“Yes, this is Sasha...who is calling?” she asked, her voice still as sweet as honey from a jar. Cooper closed his eyes. It was exactly as he had remembered it. Oh, how could he do this?

 

“Ah, just an old friend. I wanted to...” and he couldn't get another word out. He was scared. He was a 29 year old corporate lawyer, Harvard graduate, but he had been reduced to a scared twelve year old child by a few words over a telephone. He coughed.

 

“Who is this? Why are you calling again?” she asked, then she stopped. With a small catch in her voice, she asked, “Is this Cooper?”

 

“Yes,” it was all he could get out.

 

“Oh, my living god...it can't be. Cooper? Where are you? Can I see you? Please, please, let me come see you," she begged, her voice filled with sadness.

 

“Where are you, Sasha?” he managed to ask.

 

“I'm at my grandparents' home in Columbus. Grandma passed away a few months ago, and she left me the house. Cooper, why did you call me?” she asked, a softness in her voice he thought he would never hear again.

 

“Give me the address. I'm here in Columbus now. Can I come see you?” he asked, ignoring her last question; it was too hard to tell her over the phone.

 

“Please. Now would be good, if that's okay?” and she gave him the address.

 

 

 

Cooper sat at his desk a few more minutes. He had to see her, but he was now full of anxiety: was she married? Was she angry about all that his parents had put her through? Why did she so desperately want to see him? He got up, brushed himself off and went to his car, typing her address in the GPS and driving to her house. He felt like he was in a trance.

 

Cooper parked on the street and looked at the house. He actually remembered it. Sasha must have taken him here one day when she was babysitting him. He sat in the car for a while, trying to gather enough courage to go up to the door. He looked at the house again, and saw her through the window. He could only see her a little, no details, just a shadow pacing back and forth in the room, wringing her hands. Well, he couldn't sit here all day. He got out of the car and shut the door, seeing her jump inside the house and walk towards the door. He hurried up the path, the bouquet of flowers in his hand.

 

Sasha opened the door. Cooper stood there, looking at her. She looked back at him and they were at a loss for words. She finally took a step back, opening the screen door and inviting him in. He handed her the roses, his hands trembling.

 

“Oh, Cooper, they're lovely,” she said, then turned her gaze back to his face. He had changed in seventeen years. When adults don't see each other for a number of years, they change, but it is rarely so much that their friends cannot see past the few pounds or gray hair to see the person they used to be. But when a child of twelve is now twenty-nine, the changes are more drastic. Cooper still had the silky, slightly curly black hair and clear blue eyes she remembered. His mouth was still generous and looked better smiling because it reached his whole face, and he _was_ smiling at her. She let out a sigh of relief, her first fear now gone. He didn't appear angry.

 

Cooper took her in, the bright emerald eyes and long lashes, the pink cheeks with a smattering of freckles since she'd been in the sun, and that long red-gold hair. It was still her best feature and his fingers itched to run through it as he had done so many times in those days long gone. Sasha set the roses down on a table and very tentatively put out her arms for a hug, as old friends will do. Cooper's heart raced, eager to hold his Sasha in his arms again before he remembered that she was not his, and probably hadn't been even in those hot summer days they spent together. He would have to tread carefully now.

 

He gave her a gentle, chaste hug, barely touching her. But she pulled him close, as close as she could get to him and buried her face in his shoulder. She wasn't about to let go after all this time, she had dreamed of Cooper and missed him and tried to get him out of her head for far too long. He gave up being the strong one and held her just as fiercely, the two of them letting eighteen years of hurt and longing run down their faces in tears. They stood, so close together, neither one wanting to be the one to let go first, until it was ridiculous.

 

Sasha let go first, but held on to Cooper's hand and brought him to the sofa to sit while she went to the kitchen and brought back two glasses of lemonade and some cookies. She sat beside him, and their hands gravitated towards each other until they were laced together once again.

 

“Where do we start?” Cooper asked.

 

“Why did you call me? How did you find me? I've been living in England for the past four years. I only came back to Columbus for my grandmother's funeral,” she said.

 

“I found your number on the letter you wrote to my parents a few years ago. I just dialed it on the off chance you might have the same number,” Cooper told her.

 

Sasha looked sad. She brought her emerald eyes to look at Cooper, “Oh. I am so sorry about Blaine. I called your mother to see where he was buried, but she wouldn't take my call. Oh, Cooper, it must have been devastating. I'm sorry...”

 

“Sasha, I just don't know how to tell you this, but at least it's good news. Blaine is alive. They lied to you. He didn't die in a skiing accident in Switzerland. He's in Lima.”

 

The shock on her face was like getting a punch in the gut, Cooper felt it and pulled away for an instant to gather his breath back. “He...they...oh, Sasha. I don't know how to tell you.”

 

“Just start from the beginning, Cooper. Tell me everything,” she begged.

 

“My parents brought Blaine home from Florida and told everyone it was their son. I had no say in it at all. They shipped me off to boarding school as soon as they could and I only got to see him on school holidays. Then when I was getting my law degree, they told me he had died in that accident. He wasn't even in Switzerland. He was locked in their attic. Oh, my god, Sasha...they locked him in a small room for three fucking years," Cooper told her. Sasha just sat with her eyes wide and her mouth open. Tears formed in her eyes, but she wiped them away, waiting for Cooper to tell her more.

 

“I had no way of knowing what conniving people they were, I never questioned them, just blindly believed what they told me," Coop continued.

 

“Then one day I got a call from a girl in Lima. She told me Blaine was hiding in a house with her friend and he needed me. Of course I didn't believe her, but she said some things only Blaine would know, and I came back from New York. It was him, he had been rescued and was living in this boy's home. His name is Kurt. But my parents had kidnapped Kurt and Blaine wasn't doing well, he was ready for a mental hospital by then, but we found Kurt and now he lives there with Kurt's parents.

 

“My parents are in prison for kidnapping and child abuse and neglect, so I have custody of Blaine. Just over Christmas I finally told him the truth - he thought I was his brother all these years. Sasha, he's broken, he's damaged from all that he's been through. But he's getting better. He's happy about me being his father. And he wants to meet you. I gave him a picture of you, Sasha, and he wants to meet you,” Cooper finished, the rush of words finally coming to a halt. Cooper took a deep breath, undone with emotion now.

 

“Oh, my god, Cooper. If I had known. But even from the first, I never stood a chance against your parents. They told me if I didn't give up the baby to them, they would have me arrested for rape, and I know they would have done it. Over the first few years, I tried to come close enough to see him, you know. The nanny would walk him in the garden in his buggy, but I could hardly see him from such a distance. Then I looked for you, I wanted to tell you I never wanted to give up our baby, but they forced me. If they had told the police, I'd have gone to prison and had to give him up anyway, so what could I do? I avoided the scandal and lost my baby – but I knew he would be with you, his father, and you would keep him safe, and one day you would tell him about us,” Sasha sobbed the last bit into Cooper's shoulder, his arms tight around her.

 

“Are you married?” he asked.

 

“No. I never met anyone I loved as much as I loved you, Cooper. I could never bring myself to do it, to forget you. What about you?”

 

“No, I never married. I was sent away to boarding school, then to college and law school. I went right into my corporate law practice from there and never got around to finding the right girl. I have a house in New York and now I have the mansion along with Blaine, but he wants to do something charitable with it, so it's vacant for now. And Sasha, I never married because I could never find a girl as sweet as you are,” Coop finished, his eyes never leaving Sasha's eyes. “I do have something to show you, if you'll excuse me for a minute,” Cooper said, getting up and going out to his car, bringing in a large book.

 

“Oh, is this Blaine?” she asked, turning the pages of the scrap book. Looking at the ones of Blaine especially, as he grew. Here was her son, his mop of curly black hair falling in his face, his golden hazel eyes looking out of his cheerful face, smiling a the camera. There were pictures of him with Cooper, floating paper boats in the river, riding a polo pony at one of his boarding schools, opening Christmas gifts. At the end of the book was a photograph of Blaine, his beautiful eyes shining as he smiled at another boy, this one a little taller, with chestnut hair and blue-gray eyes and just one look at them gazing into each other's faces said they were in love. Sasha gasped, looking at Cooper.

 

Cooper thought he should have told Sasha their son was gay before he showed her the picture, but he wanted to see her first reaction, and now that he did, he didn't know what to do, how to deal with it. At least he saved Blaine the pain of seeing the rejection when she found out, maybe he wouldn't tell Blaine he'd found her just yet...

 

“Oh, Cooper. He's all grown up. Look at him, I missed his whole childhood and now he's in love and I never got to be the one he brought his love home to. Oh, I missed everything, Cooper. Were you there, did you get to meet this boyfriend before and watch them fall in love?” she said with tears renewed in her eyes.

 

Cooper blinked. It wasn't at all what he had thought. She was only sad she missed this part of Blaine's life.

 

“That's Kurt. He's the one that found Blaine in the attic and saved him. Kurt and a few other friends hid Blaine and took care of him for months before they found me. That is who he lives with now, Kurt and his family. Blaine needs to have someone around him and I'm alone, so Blaine would be alone while I'm at work. We all decided he was better for him to stay with Kurt, I hope you understand. Nobody can calm him down when he has a bad spell like Kurt, he doesn't trust anyone else in the same way. Not even me.”

 

“Kurt must be a special person. Do you think I can meet Blaine? Would he want to see me after all that has happened?” Sasha asked, afraid of what Cooper's answer might be, but she had to know.

 

“I'll go home and tell him I saw you. I'll ask if he wants to come and meet, but I can probably tell you now that he won't come without Kurt,” Coop told her.

 

“Of course he must bring Kurt. I want to meet the boy that is so special in my son's life. Oh, Cooper, that sounds so....I don't know, so right. I haven't dared to call Blaine my son out loud. Ever. I thought he was lost to me, Cooper, just as I thought you were lost to me. We can stay in touch, can't we? Please.” Sasha's face was a picture of hope.

 

“Of course, now I've found you once again, Sasha, I'm not letting you go. I may have been too young when we parted so long ago, then I couldn't help what happened. But I'm in control now and I'm not letting you go again,” Cooper said, wondering if she would make him leave if he told her how he still felt about her.

 

“Are you ready for my confession? Can I tell you the whole truth?” he asked, searching her eyes to see if she might feel a shred of what he was feeling.

 

“Of course, Cooper. You can say anything to me,” Sasha whispered, afraid to say it out loud.

 

“I never married because I was still in love with you. I still feel that way, but now I don't know if it's a childhood memory that I want to relive or if it's a real emotion that I'll have the rest of my life,” Coop admitted.

 

“Oh.....I've felt the same way. I hated the decision I was forced to make back then, and I've never stopped missing you. Can I see you again, Cooper, soon? And can you bring our son to see me?” Sasha asked.

 

“I'll have to talk to him, he needs to make up his own mind. But yes, I'll be there this evening and I'll talk to him. I do want to see you again. Can I take you to dinner tomorrow evening?” Coop asked. He knew he should put some space here, go home and think about everything and take it slower. But he didn't want to, damn it.

 

“Okay, I will wait for you to call and let me know where and when. Cooper, it was so brave of you to come here, to call me. And thank you, for telling me about Blaine. Just, thank you,” she said, walking him to the door and leaning closer to him as he embraced her, kissing her cheek before taking his leave. She turned her face up and smiled at him, and kissed his lips before closing the door.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Kurt woke up first and watched Blaine sleep, gently stroking his cheek to wake him up. They had been up late last night, knowing they could sleep as late as they wanted this morning. It had been a better night than most, Blaine only having one nightmare, so Kurt called it a very good night. Blaine twitched in his sleep, his hand moving across the bed to find something, his face with a worried frown on it, even in sleep. He reached and found Kurt's leg, tugging it to bring him closer. Blaine was an absolute cuddle whore, even in sleep, and Kurt laughed.

 

“Hey, Blaine, want to wake up and have something to eat? I'll cook!” Kurt offered.

 

“Okay,” a sleepy voice said, Blaine's beautiful eyes opened to the bright day. He smiled up at Kurt, making Kurt's heart tug a bit at the love he felt every time Blaine looked at him like that.

 

“Want to take a shower first?” Kurt coaxed and Blaine was up in record time. It wasn't every day that Kurt let him share his morning shower.

 

They stumbled into the bathroom, taking off their clothes and shivering a bit in the cool air before Kurt got the water the right temperature and they both got in. Despite the sleepiness that Blaine just couldn't shake this morning, they ended up giggling and tickling, covering each other with slick soap suds and sliding their bodies together until they weren't laughing any more. Kurt pulled Blaine into a kiss, heating up the encounter as Blaine moved his tongue down Kurt's neck, nibbling and kissing the whole way. But he didn't stop there, his slick hands stroking Kurt's back and down over his round ass, squeezing the muscles and humming in satisfaction when Kurt's cock brushed up against his leg. Blaine knelt down and took Kurt into his mouth, going so deep Kurt took in a startled breath and grabbed the mop of curly hair to steady himself. Blaine was taking no prisoners today, as he licked across the crown, paying particular attention to the ridge before a quick slide of his tongue over the slit and back down so Kurt's cock brushed the back of his throat. He swallowed to encourage his boyfriend to relax and enjoy himself and Kurt did just that, moaning as he let the curls of desire build up in his belly and swirl down his balls to climb up the shaft. He had reached a certain pitch in his moans that Blaine knew meant there wasn't much time left, so he took his wet fingers and brushed across Kurt's entrance, pink and waiting for him. This was the key to let Kurt come undone and he came deep in Blaine's throat, moaning and calling Blaine's name as Blaine swallowed and swallowed to clear his mouth.

 

Blaine stood up, still a bit shaky from being on his knees on the hard porcelain, but happy he was able to give Kurt some loving care for once. And to look at him, it was just what he needed. Kurt's face was no longer drawn and pale, it was rosy with exertion and the smile on his lips was so kissable, Blaine leaned over to do just that. Kurt reached for Blaine's body, wanting to give him some pleasure, but Blaine backed up a bit.

 

“No, it's not necessary, Kurt. I can wait for later. You must be hungry?” Blaine said.

 

“You're right, I am hungry. But not for food...” Kurt said, dropping to his knees and taking Blaine into his own mouth, licking all over Blaine's cock at a fast pace, then slowing down to savor the moments. He was careful and exact in where he licked, knowing all the places that sent Blaine over the edge of excitement and sensibility. He had Blaine growling and panting in a matter of a few strokes and built up the pressure with little kitten licks before going down almost to his belly, humming to create a vibration Kurt knew drove Blaine wild. It was only a few more minutes until Blaine was shouting his name, moaning out his joy at the thrilling sensation that took over his whole body. He came fast and hard, surprising Kurt who choked a tiny bit before gathering himself and helping his boyfriend through the climax and stood up to hold him tightly for a few minutes as they settled down afterwards.

 

After rinsing away any remaining evidence of their morning lovemaking, they got dressed and went up stairs to get some breakfast.

 

 

 

Finn was standing at the kitchen counter, just taking a crumb cake out of the oven.

 

“Hey, guys, who's ready to eat?” Finn asked. Smiling at the two brothers of his heart, if not his blood.

 

“Oh, that smells good. I'm starving!” Blaine said, getting plates and flatwear out to set the table.

 

“Where's the little elves that cooked that for you?” Kurt asked, pretending to search under the cupboards.

 

“Hey, that's not funny, Kurt. I baked this myself, Gramma Sophie taught me how. I was waiting for Puck to get home from a job yesterday and she was baking, so she showed me how to do it. It's nice to have someone believe in me besides my mom,” Finn complained, feeling a bit low because they always thought the least of him, if there was trouble anywhere, you could bet his name would be called. But in his heart, Finn had trouble believing in himself. He sighed and looked over at Blaine to see if the table was set. Blaine smiled back, nodding at Finn to show he believed in him.

 

They all sat down to eat, and Kurt was pleasantly surprised, the crumb cake was delicious. He patted Finn on the arm.

 

“It's delicious. I'll never doubt your culinary skills again. You can bake for me any time, Finn,” Kurt said sincerely.

 

“Sure, dude, I'll do it any time for you.” as he smiled, laughing at the joke.

 

 

 

After breakfast, the boys went into the family room to play some video games, then watch a movie. It was late afternoon when Cooper walked in, his eyes searching for Blaine as soon as he entered the room. Blaine got up and followed him like a little lamb to his shepherd, Kurt close behind.

 

“What's wrong, Cooper? You look like...well I don't know. But you look different,” Blaine said as they walked into the dining room and sat at the table.

 

“It's about Sasha. Your mother. I called her and she's living in Columbus,” Cooper said, “She asked me to meet with her, so I drove over to her house.” Coop was beginning to have some trouble speaking, he was so filled with emotion. Blaine moved closer and put his hand on his father's shoulder.

 

“Was it bad?” Blaine asked.

 

“No, no it wasn't. She was trying to see you when my parents told her the same thing they told me – that you had died in Switzerland. She cried when I told her you were still alive, and what had happened to you. I showed her pictures of you,” Coop told him. “I showed her the scrapbook I showed you last week.”

 

“There's a picture of me with Kurt in there. Did she see it?” Blaine asked, avoiding the real question he wanted to ask. Did she know he was gay? How did she react?

 

“Yes. She started to cry, Bee,” Coop said.

 

“Oh. Well, then I guess she won't want to meet me,” he said, all the excitement leaving his face. Kurt's arms went around Blaine's waist and he kissed his cheek.

 

“No, Blaine. You don't understand. She was crying because you looked so happy. She was so glad you had found Kurt and she wants you to come and see her -both of you. If you want to, of course. She doesn't want you to be uncomfortable. I can go with you if you want to.”

 

Blaine looked shocked and Kurt was beginning to worry a little about him.

 

“Are you okay, baby? I know it's a lot to take in, but I will be with you the whole time. You don't have to go if you don't want to, Bee. Just sit and take it all in for a while and make the decision later,” Kurt said, stroking his arm and placing kisses on his neck and jaw.

 

“He's right, Squirt. You take as long as you want to decide, okay?” Cooper told his son, leaning forward to place his hand on his cheek for a moment, looking into his eyes to gauge if everything was okay.

 

“No, I don't need to think about it. I want to see her. When can we go?” Blaine asked, thinking the sooner the better because he would have less time to build up the dread he was feeling.

 

“Okay, I can call her tonight,” Cooper offered.

 

“Coop, ah...Dad? Can I call her now? I just need to hear her voice,” Blaine said before he could back out.

 

Cooper looked at Blaine. It was the first time he had actually called him “Dad”. He took out his phone and handed it to Blaine.

 

Blaine looked through the contact list and pushed the button to call Sasha. It rang.

 

“Oh, Cooper? What did he say? Will he see me?” a breathy voice came over the line, so full of hope it made Blaine gasp.

 

“Ah..no, this isn't Cooper. Sasha? Mom? This is Blaine,” he managed to squeak out, searching for Cooper's hand to hold.

 

“Blaine? Oh, will you come to see me? Or I can come to you. I don't want to scare you, but I'd give anything to just see you...” Sasha said over the phone.

 

“I can come see you, when will it be good for you?” Blaine asked, hardly able to hold the phone he was shaking so badly. Kurt took the phone from him when he saw the tears start falling.

 

“Sasha? This is Blaine's boyfriend, Kurt. He is not really able to speak right now. Can I give him your message?”

 

“Oh, the boy in the photo. Is Blaine okay?” Sasha asked Kurt.

 

“Yes, he's just a bit emotional. He'll be okay. He wants to meet with you,” Kurt told her.

 

“Is tomorrow too soon? Oh, you must have school?” Sasha asked.

 

“We get out at 2:00. It's an hour to Columbus. Can we meet at 3:30?” Kurt asked, getting a nod from Cooper.

 

“Yes. Cooper knows how to get here. I'll be looking forward to it. Please come, too, Kurt. I want to meet the boy that put that smile on my son's face.”

 

“I will. Thank you.”

 

“Bye.”

 

“Bye for now.”


	8. Why Didn't You Want Me?

Classes at McKinley lasted forever, and by the time history was over, Blaine was a nervous mess. He didn't happen to have history with Kurt, so he sat close to Santana. She could see he was not doing well, and held his hand, cuddling him close to her side before the end of class. Normally this would not have been tolerated in a classroom, but all the teachers knew about Blaine and his PTSD, so it was overlooked by most of them. Most of the students had come to accept it, too, and nobody wanted to cross Santana Lopez on a bet.

After class, she walked with Blaine to Kurt's locker, not sure why he was so upset but not willing to leave him alone.

 

“I'm going to meet my mother today, Tana. I'm just a little nervous I guess,” he said in a soft voice. 

 

“Oh, Blaine! I am so happy for you. Please call me later and tell me about it, okay?” she said in her nicest voice, one she usually saved for Brittany.

 

Kurt walked up and Santana turned to him, her haughty face back in place. “Okay, Pretty Pony, take care of the Prince in the Tower for me. I'll catch up with you tomorrow.” And she leaned forward, kissing Blaine on the lips and turning on her heel, gone before Blaine or Kurt could get over their shock to speak. They just looked at each other, shrugging their shoulders. Kurt was the first to laugh, but Blaine joined in and they laughed for a while before Blaine's phone rang, it was Cooper calling to see what was taking them so long. 

 

 

The drive to Columbus was quiet, each of them filled with their own thoughts. Kurt sat in the back seat, Blaine's head cradled against his shoulder as close as they could be with seat belts on. His hand was tangled with Blaine's, too, and Kurt played with Blaine's fingers absently as he wondered if he should stay in the car while Blaine went in with Cooper to meet Sasha.

 

Cooper was busy watching the road, tired from too little sleep the past few days and all the stress on top of it. He wasn't too stressed about his law practice, that was going well, the other senior partners and the new junior partners were keeping things going even with Cooper's absence. He had asked one of them to find out the legalities of Blaine's birth certificate. He had never signed anything giving up his parental rights to his son, so it was quite likely that whatever his parents had done to get the certificate reissued in their names, it was not legal. That was just another question he'd have to ask Sasha. Blaine had actually been born in Florida, but his birth certificate said he was born in Ohio, so it was obviously a fake. 

 

Blaine was trying to concentrate on the songs coming out of his iPod. He had so many questions, so many hopes, he was so very, very confused. He didn't want to let the anxiety take over, He was afraid he might have a spell in front of Sasha, and she would see what a mess he was and not want to be near him ever again. This scenario had played over and over in his head all night and most of the day. 

His friends had helped, first Puck then Santana holding his hand during classes, both of them pulling Blaine into their sides to offer him comfort. Puck had excused them in the middle of science class to go to the bathroom in spite of all the looks they got, and once there he had just held Blaine close, cheek to cheek as Puck told him everything would be okay. He had offered to get Kurt for him, but Blaine was feeling better after the closeness and support, so he was able to go back to class and finish the hour before Santana picked him up to walk him to history. He was so blessed to have such good friends to take care of him.

 

He closed his eyes, but the awful feeling was getting worse. He'd taken an anti-anxiety pill before they started out, and that usually worked, but not this time and he began to tremble, knowing a spell was coming on, but in the confines of the car, he couldn't do anything about it. Kurt noticed and looked into his eyes, asking silently if he was okay, and Blaine shook his head, 'no'. 

 

“Cooper? Can you find a place to pull over?” Kurt asked.

 

Cooper glanced around and saw the panic in Blaine's eyes and took the next exit, parking on the shoulder of the road next to a pasture. There was nobody in sight, just some cows in the field and a grove of trees. Kurt got out right away, sprinting around to open the door and unbuckle Blaine, offering his hand to help him out.

 

Blaine got out on shaky legs, trying in vain not to cry as he looked around to see if anyone was watching him. By this time, Cooper had joined them and threw his arm around Blaine for support. They walked slowly down the road for a while, talking quietly to Blaine, trying to see what the exact problem was so they could address it in some way. But both Kurt and Cooper thought it was because he was going to meet his mother.

 

“Bee, you don't have to do it today. We can go back to Lima and you can go to bed. You might just need some sleep. We can do it another day, or I can ask her to come to Lima and meet you there?” Cooper suggested. He wanted to see Sasha again, but nothing was going to come before Blaine right now.

 

“No, I was just nervous and the car was too small all of a sudden. We're closer to Columbus than we are to Lima, aren't we?” Blaine asked.

 

“Yes. We're only about ten minutes from her house. But I don't mind going back if you don't feel up to this,” Cooper told his son. “It is all about how you feel, Bee. Tell me what you want to do.”

 

“I don't know. Kurt? What should I do?” Blaine asked.

 

“First, just clear your mind. Look at the cows...let's think up names for them like we used to, okay?” Kurt suggested. He had come up with this game a year ago when any drive in the car had made Blaine upset. Blaine closed his eyes for a minute, then opened them to look at the cows.

 

“Dolly, that's the fat one with the dragging udder,” he said, looking at Kurt.

 

“Okay, then the little one with a black patch over her eye? Angelina, after Miss Jolie when she played on 'Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow',' Kurt said, getting a smile out of Blaine. They looked at Cooper. “Your turn,” Kurt told him.

 

“The almost all white one: Pippi because she was long reddish stockings,” Cooper contributed.

 

They named all the cows in the field before Blaine stopped trembling, but he was feeling much better.

 

“You okay to go now?” Kurt asked.

 

“Yes, thank you. Let's be on our way,” Blaine agreed, hugging Cooper and planting a kiss on Kurt's cheek before walking back to the car. 

 

The rest of the ride was better, although his grip on Kurt's hand was tighter than it had been for a long time. They pulled into the drive of a white brick Arts-and-Crafts style house with a neat yard. It was January, so the snow covered everything, but Kurt could imagine the flowerbeds bright with colorful flowers come summer.

 

Kurt asked Blaine if he wanted him to wait in the car, if he wanted to meet his mother alone the first time, but the question wasn't even out of his mouth before Blaine had climbed into his lap, hugging tightly and burying his face in Kurt's neck. 

“Oh, Blaine, I'll be there with you. Don't be afraid, it will be fine. Cooper wouldn't have brought you here if something bad was going to happen,” Kurt whispered to his boyfriend. He was a little scared himself, that Blaine might not be strong enough to take this, but he had to trust Cooper on this one. He tilted Blaine's chin up and kissed him on his soft lips, deepening the kiss just a little to reassure Blaine he would be there. Blaine sighed and got out of the car, taking Cooper's hand as they walked up the path. Cooper had text ahead that they might be a little late, but didn't explain why. He wanted Sasha to meet Blaine before discussing much more about him.

 

 

Kurt smiled as he took the old fashioned knocker and tapped on the oak door. It was in the shape of a lion and was very obviously original to the house. Fashion might be Kurt's forte, but an appreciation of architecture wasn't far behind. He was standing in front, Cooper holding Blaine close beside him to give him comfort. 

 

A woman opened the door, looking up at Kurt with huge emerald green eyes and flowing golden-red hair in waves down her back. She looked a bit surprised as she surveyed Kurt from hair to boots, but the smile of recognition broke through and she said, “Kurt?” 

 

Kurt did a double take, wondering how she knew him, but remembered Cooper mentioning he had shown her a picture of him with Blaine. He put out his hand and shook hers. She had a firm grip and Kurt wondered if it was from holding back fear.

 

“Cooper?” she said as Kurt moved inside at her direction. She pulled him into a gentle hug and he went inside, leaving a trembling Blaine on the porch to see his mother for the first time. She looked at him with curiosity, seeing how much he looked like the picture she had seen yesterday and how much more he was in person. His hair was curly, black with a small amount of gel to tame the wildness down. His golden skin was blushed a rosy pink in..what? Embarrassment? Fear? She couldn't quite put her finger on it. Then she looked into his golden hazel eyes, big with emotion and accented with long, thick lashes that fanned across his cheeks when he closed his eyes. He kept his hands behind him, his head down and she noticed the neat button down shirt with a bowtie and cardigan sweater under the wool overcoat. 

 

“Oh....” was all she managed to say, quite overwhelmed at having her son standing before her. She forgot where she was, just standing there staring at him and making him more anxious than he already was. Cooper came to their rescue and took her arm, bringing her inside her house so Blaine could enter. They stood together in the foyer looking at each other until Kurt cleared his throat and asked Sasha if they could perhaps sit down? Sasha shook her head and remembered where she was.

 

“Please, come into the living room and have a seat. Can I get you anything to drink?” she asked. “I have iced tea, soda, lemonade?”

 

They all agreed on iced tea and Cooper offered to help her in the kitchen. Blaine and Kurt sat on the sofa, Blaine scooting over to Kurt and cuddling under his arm to get close. Kurt absentmindedly kissed his cheek and stroked his side.

 

“She's pretty, isn't she?” Blaine asked him.

 

“She is, baby. I can see her in you. Your eyes aren't the same color, but they have the same intensity,” Kurt said, cupping Blaine's cheek and kissing his lips softly. Blaine relaxed in Kurt's arms, letting out a sigh. “You'll be okay, sweetheart. I'll be here with you the whole time.”

 

“Thanks, Kurt. I'm …...I'm just a little scared. Don't leave me alone with her, okay?” Blaine asked.

 

“Never in life, Blaine. You know I'm always here for you.”

 

 

Cooper and Sasha came back in the room, sitting in the two chairs facing the sofa, handing the iced tea around. There was music playing in the background, but everyone was nervous and they just sat, no one saying much more than questions about the weather. Finally, Blaine blurted out, “Why didn't you want me?”

 

Shocked breaths were heard and he just sat, looking at Sasha for a moment, waiting for her to say something. She took a breath to speak and it came out as a squeak. She tried again, moving closer and taking Blaine's hand in hers. “Blaine, I never wanted to give you away. I was just seventeen and had no way to take care of you. I was going to try anyway, but Mrs Anderson told me if I didn't give you to her that they would call the police. You know Cooper was only twelve when you were born, only eleven when I got pregnant. They would have put me in juvenile detention and I would have lost you anyway. By giving you to them, I knew Cooper would be there. I thought having one parent was better than not having any.

 

“It's hard to believe, but I thought they would let me see you. That's what they told me. But when I tried to visit, they told me I had to leave, that they would give you up for adoption before they would let me see you. I couldn't take you away from Cooper, so I gave up. I finished college, went to graduate school, and started working. My folks never knew about you and when my father got a job offer in Australia, I went with them. I came home four years ago and asked to see you again. That's when Mrs Anderson told me you had died.

 

“Blaine, I died myself that day. I tried to tell myself it was meant to be, that it was just something that happened. But I blamed myself. I kept thinking that if I had kept you, you'd still be alive. I couldn't make myself go back to Australia, so I went to New York for a while. Then when my grandmother left me this house, I came here. But coming home wasn't a solution. Cooper called me, and he told me what happened to you. Oh, Blaine, I'm so sorry. This mess is all my fault -from the very beginning, it has all been my fault. I just want you to know one thing.” Sasha looked at Blaine, her heart breaking at the look on his face. “I always loved you, Blaine. I thought I did the best for you, giving you to your real father, giving you to Cooper. He was young, but I knew he would love you and protect you and the Andersons would be able to give you everything I couldn't. Do you understand? Do you hate me?” She said in a quiet voice, searching Blaine's golden hazel eyes for some bit of forgiveness.

 

Blaine just sat there, his hands in hers, wanting to cry and throw himself in her arms and tell her everything was okay, that he forgave her for seventeen years of neglect. But he couldn't do it. He couldn't forgive her for letting him go like he was a litter of unwanted kittens. He couldn't forgive her for taking advantage of an eleven year old child and saddling him with a baby that was then stolen from him. It was too much. He pulled back, turning into Kurt's shoulder and burying his face as he did when he was stressed, finding a little comfort in Kurt's immediate reaction as he held Blaine close, thumbing over his knuckles as he held Blaine's hand. He started to get worried as Blaine's breathing got ragged and fast. 

 

“Blaine, Blaine, baby, calm down. I'm here. Nobody can hurt you with me here. Look at me, Blaine. Here, look up here at me,” Kurt said, cupping his chin and moving his head up so he could see his eyes. “You're fine, baby, I'm going to stay with you, nobody can hurt you now. You're strong, Blaine,” he said, locking his eyes on Blaine's.

 

Blaine looked into the beautiful blue gray eyes of the boy he loved and felt better. He knew Kurt would always be there for him. “Kurt,” he said in a whisper in Kurt's ear, “I need to leave. Please take me home. Please, now. I have to go.” Blaine ended in a sob and Kurt stood up, pulling Blaine with him.

 

“I'm sorry, Sasha, but Blaine has to leave. Cooper?” Kurt raised his eyebrows at the man, expecting him to come along.

 

“Go ahead, Kurt, take Bee to the car, I'll be right there,” Cooper said and Kurt turned to go.

 

“I'll....I will come back, but I don't know when. Thank you for seeing me, ah.....I don't know what to call you, but please give me some time and I will contact you. I'm sorry,” Blaine said to Sasha, still holding on to Kurt.

 

“It's okay, Blaine. I understand. It's a lot to take in. Call me when you're ready,” she said with tears in her eyes, not wanting him to leave, but feeling she had no choice. She turned to Kurt, “Thank you, Kurt, for coming with Blaine. I can see how much you mean to him and you are always welcome here. After meeting you, I can see why Blaine loves you,” Sasha said, taking Kurt's hand and shaking it. Kurt left, taking Blaine out to the car to wait for Cooper.

 

After they left, Cooper walked over to Sasha, putting his arms around her as she cried. “He hates me, Cooper. He'll never forgive me. I hurt him too much and he blames me for leaving him to be tortured by those people.”

 

“It's just too hard on him right now, Sasha. He's had a rough time of it, and finding out that I am his father was a shock. I think we should have waited to bring him to see you, but I was so anxious that he know you. I made the mistake, Sasha, not you. I may have been a child when he was born, but it doesn't look like I've grown up very much, does it?” Cooper laughed, but without much humor. He sighed. “Sasha, if you want to give me a ride to my office later, I can just let Kurt take Blaine home now and I can stay with you for a while. But only if you want me to, I don't want to intrude, but you look so sad. Would that help?” Cooper offered.

 

“Of course I can give you a ride, Cooper. Please stay for a while, if you think Blaine will be okay without you?”

 

“He has Kurt. We do have a good relationship, but it's Kurt that he needs when he's like this. Nobody else can calm him, not even me. Much to my regret, I was gone so much of the time when he was growing up, we don't have a father/son relationship. Because of my parents, it's more like a brother thing, and I don't think he's really forgiven me for all of that yet,” Cooper said ruefully. “I'll just go tell them to take the car and be right back in.”

 

 

Cooper was back in just a few minutes, having explained that he was going to sleep at the office and they could come get him tomorrow or he could have one of his assistants drive him to Lima. He hugged Blaine, kissing his cheek and making sure he would be okay and wasn't upset if Coop stayed. Blaine seemed fine with it, saying he understood and apologizing to Cooper for the way he'd acted inside. Cooper was quick to tell him it was fine, that he knew it was a hard thing for Blaine to wrap his mind around. Blaine threw his arms around his father, holding him very tightly and assuring him he would be fine, he just wanted to go home and go to bed. It would take time, but he felt he would be able to speak with Sasha one day. 

 

 

Back inside, Cooper found Sasha on the sofa, crying into a pillow. He sat down, taking her into his arms and holding her tightly.

 

“Oh, Sasha, it will be okay. He is a damaged kid and it will take some time, but he told me out in the car that he was sorry and he would be able to talk with you one day. He is just overwhelmed. He had a panic attack on the way here, in spite of the medications. Don't blame yourself for something you couldn't help that happened so long ago,” Cooper told her in a soft voice, his heart hurting seeing her this distraught. It seemed like she was a different person, so much older than when he had first seen her yesterday, but now it was almost like no time had gone by at all, and she was still his Irish princess, his Sasha. Before he even thought about it, he had leaned closer to her and placed his lips on hers. She startled, but caught herself quickly and returned his kiss, letting out a whimper as she put her arms around his shoulders.

 

“Oh, Cooper, I've missed you,” she breathed into his neck, holding him close. 

 

“Sasha, I'm not the naïve little twelve year old you remember from that summer long gone by. I'm twenty-nine and it's not the same. Not at all,” Cooper breathed into her hair, running his fingers through the silky locks just like he did that summer.

 

“I know. I don't expect you to be, Cooper. But I've never stopped missing you, never. Maybe we can't just take up where we left off, I wouldn't expect you to. Could we maybe start over again? Is there room in your heart for us to begin a new bond between us? Because I thought that we had was something special, something no one else had, Cooper,” Sasha blurted, not able to stop her voice once it started, trying to keep herself from begging the love of her life to give her another chance. 

Her hands had wound themselves into the back of his shirt, tangled so tight she couldn't get them loose, not that she tried. Cooper put his lips on hers once again, closing his eyes to see if the feeling he'd left behind on that cold day when she had told his parents about Blaine could be rekindled. He'd dreamed about her a thousand times, ten times a thousand times, but never really believed it would actually happen.

 

“Oh, Sasha...maybe. We could try? Go slowly and see if it can be just us again? I'm willing to try if you are,” Cooper said, knowing he was treading on thin ice that could crack and break, plunging him into a cold and quiet hell if he took a wrong step. It was true that he was very afraid, but he knew his Sasha was worth the risk.

 

“Maybe we can find our way back to each other, At least I think we can,” she said and pulled him down on the sofa and into her waiting arms. 

 

 


	9. Come What May

“Blaine, does it bother you to go by your old house? I mean to be inside it, in your old room?” Kurt asked. They were driving home from Columbus in Cooper's car and were about to drive by the Anderson mansion.

 

“No. Just in the attic room. As long as I stay away from that, I'm fine. Why?” Blaine asked.

 

“We're driving right by there, I thought we might stop for a few minutes,” Kurt said.

 

“Sure, Kurt, that would be fine. I think it will feel different if it's just the two of us. I wouldn't go alone, but with you it should be fine,” Blaine replied. 

 

They drove up to the gate and Kurt got out and unlocked it with Cooper's keys, driving in and locking the gates behind him. Once inside, they walked through the kitchen and into the hallway, turning into the music room. Blaine automatically walked over to the grand piano and sat down, opening the key cover to run his fingers over the ivory keys. He just had to smile as he did this, he had spent so many hours playing this beautiful instrument that it was instantly relaxing to sit here and do it once again. His fingers began to play, almost as though they played by themselves, picking out the tune without him giving it any thought. He played 'Moonlight Sonata', his favorite piece of music. 

 

“I love that...” Kurt began, startling Blaine, who had quite forgotten Kurt was there. 

 

“I love it, too. I always played it when I was sad, missing Cooper or trying to come to terms with understanding who I was. It is like eating chicken soup, a comforting thing no matter how big the problem, everything just seems more manageable if you're eating it. Well, playing this does it for me,” Blaine explained, taking Kurt's hand in his own for a moment and pulling him down on the piano bench beside him. He leaned his head on Kurt's shoulder as Kurt put his arm around Blaine and kissed his hair.

 

“Play something else?” Kurt asked.

 

“Only if you sing with me,” Blaine told him. Kurt nodded and let Blaine go so he could play. As soon as the first notes hit the air, Kurt knew what it was and his voice joined Blaine's as they sang:

 

 

_Never knew I could feel like this_

 

_Like I've never seen the sky before_

 

_Want to vanish inside your kiss_

 

_Every day I love you more and more_

 

_Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing?_

 

_Telling me to give you everything_

 

_Seasons may change; winter to spring_

 

_But I love you until the end of time._

 

 

_Come what may, come what may_

 

_I will love you until my dying day_

 

_Suddenly the world sees such a perfect place_

 

_Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace_

 

_Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste_

 

_It all revolves around you._

 

 

_And there's no mountain too high, no river too wide_

 

_Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side_

 

_Storm clouds may gather, and stars may collide_

 

_But I love you until the end of time_

 

_Come what may, come what may_

 

_I will love you, oh, I will love you_

 

_Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place_

 

_Come what may, come what may_

 

_I will love you until my dying day._

 

 

“I will, you know,” Blaine whispered into Kurt's neck as he turned to nuzzle closer, feeling Kurt wrap his strong arms around his shoulders. His own arms were grasping Kurt's waist as they just sat together, breathing in their scent, eyes closed against the rest of the world. Sometimes it just felt like they only needed each other.

 

Moving a little apart, the feelings getting too intense, and now the need for space between them for a breath or two was upon them. Kurt stretched his arms toward the ceiling, stifling a yawn. He'd been driving for over an hour and was a bit tired. Blaine got up to move his legs, his right one beginning to cramp just a bit the way he was sitting. He strolled over to the music cupboard and opened it, idly looking at the instrument cases. He chose one at random, taking it out with a smile on his face, trying to recall the last time he played this instrument.

 

Opening the case, he took out the viola, handling it with reverent care, catching the scent of the old wood, the rosin for the bow, the soft flannel he used to wipe it clean after every use. He tightened the bow, taking time to rosin it carefully and examine it for wear or loose strands. This one was made of horse hair and the light color coordinated with the darkness of the wood for the bow. He put the viola under his chin and plucked the first string, automatically reaching to tune it, then each string by turn until the instrument was tuned.

 

He closed his eyes, Kurt sitting quite forgotten beside him while he thought about the notes as he last saw them on a page. He lifted the bow to touch the strings and let out the breath he'd been holding as he drew it slowly across to make the first note. It was like nothing he could think to compare it to, this making notes come from just a little wooden box and a stick with hair on it. But it sounded like culture and life and love all combined as he played.

 

Blaine was out of practice, he hadn't been able to touch the viola in years, then in the last year he was just too busy to do it. He could play a piano or even the drums or guitar at school, but violas were such a personal thing, he would never ask to play someone else's instrument. It would be like asking to use their toothbrush, too personal.

 

He let his mind go blank for a moment, waiting for the music to come from his brain and travel down to his fingers before he could play, and Debussy began to come out of the viola, almost as if it came of its own volition from the instrument itself. It was as if he was just holding the instrument and the music came pouring forth, demanding to be heard. Blaine played with his eyes closed, making a few errors, but the music got cleaner and there were less mistakes as he continued to play, the muscle memory taking over so he was hardly thinking of the notes anymore, just the feelings that coursed through his veins as he played. This was what he was born to do, play music, sing music....love music. 

 

Blaine came to the end of the piece, then played it once again, and Kurt didn't hear any of the errors the second time. He knew Blaine was good, great even, but to pick up an instrument after five years and play it this well? Kurt was amazed. He had never heard anything so beautiful. Well, aside from Blaine's voice when he sang to him, but this was a gift Kurt felt blessed to be able to hear. 

 

At the end, Blaine set the viola down, visibly better than he had been in days, weeks even. This was better than therapy. It was more than respite, it was something that healed Blaine. He put the viola back in the case, loosening first the strings by their pegs and then the bow and wiping the wooden body of the instrument before placing it carefully back in the music closet. He looked at the cases, trying to decide on the next one to try. He didn't feel like getting out all the drums in the kit, drums were for when he was angry he laughed to himself, thinking of all the times he had pounded out his frustration on those drum heads until he'd had to buy new sticks to replace the battered ones.

 

Ah, here was something Kurt probably didn't even know Blaine owned, if he had heard of the instrument at all. He walked over to a dark corner of the music room and pulled the cover off an instrument that looked kind of like an organ, but older and more ornate. Blaine smiled. It wasn't an instrument he played very often, but had taken it up when a friend of Cooper's had been cleaning out his parents' attic and asked Cooper if he knew anyone that wanted it. Blaine had a bit of a time finding someone to teach it to him, but finally there was a professor at the university in Columbus that knew and was so happy to find a young person so interested that he had taught young Blaine for free. 

 

“What is that, baby?” Kurt asked, not sure he had seen one before.

 

“It's a harmonium. It could be compared to an organ, I guess, but the sound is more like an accordion because the reeds are played by a bellows I pump with my feet. Here, let me show you,” he said, dusting off the keyboard and testing the bellows. His parents...well, his grandparents, had paid a great deal of money to have it restored and the bellows were fine. 

 

“I only know a few things on this that I can remember, and probably not a whole piece of music of any of them. Do you want Strauss, Rossini, or Mahler? I was working on Liszt's _Purgatorio_ , but I'm not sure I can play that one from memory.”

 

“Oh, Mahler by all means!” Kurt enthused, feeling privileged that Blaine would play for him.

 

“Okay, I know the first movement of Mahler's Symphony #8, but forgive me if I'm a little rusty...” Blaine said and Kurt opened his mouth to say something about Blaine's music genius, but thought better of it and closed his mouth, ready to hear anything Blaine could play for him.

 

The music was wonderful. Blaine did recall most of the notes, only stumbling through a few bars in the beginning, once again closing his eyes and letting it take control, as though he were part of the instrument and the music played itself. He finished the first movement and found he recalled a lot of the second, so he continued. 

 

“I know this is a crazy question, but how many instruments can you play?” Kurt asked after clapping when Blaine was done.

 

Blaine sat and thought for a few minutes. “Do you mean proficient or just to mess around?”

 

“Somehow I think anything you can 'mess around' with would be more than proficient in my book, Blaine. You are a music prodigy.” Kurt smiled.

 

Blaine laughed. “Okay. Piano, guitar, violin, viola, cello, harmonium, mandolin, drums, harmonica, ukulele, ah....dulcimer, recorder, and kazoo! I've picked up some others, but I wouldn't say I could actually play them,” Blaine told him, blushing a little because he thought it sounded a little too much like bragging. “I had dreams of starting maybe a woodwind or brass instrument, but then...well, I didn't get the chance.”

 

“Wow. I don't play anything. Well, maybe the kazoo. Or I can makes those squashy sounds with my arm pit that kids do in elementary school, I guess,” Kurt kidded. “But all the music I can actually do is sing.”

 

“With your pipes, that's all you need to do, Kurt. You are the best singer I've ever heard. That first night you spent with me in the attic, when you sang “Toora Loora Loora”, honestly, I thought you were an angel. I woke up the next day not believing you were real. I think I fell in love with you that night, Kurt,” Blaine said so seriously, Kurt felt the burn of tears in his eyes. He couldn't say anything else, he just leaned forward, pulling Blaine towards himself and kissed him very gently, very tenderly. 

 

“I fell in love with you the same night, Blaine.” 

 

Music forgotten for the moment, Kurt sat on the bench, tugging Blaine into his lap as he kissed him again. Blaine startled when he felt them over balancing and beginning to fall, but they caught themselves and stood up, still kissing until they had to come up for air, faces flushed and eyes sparkling.

 

“Come with me...” Blaine took Kurt's hand and pulled him along, going up the stairs and into his bedroom, throwing back the covers and landing in the bed, Kurt under him as he wiggled closer and began to kiss his boyfriend once again in earnest. 

 

“Oh, Blaine...this is a fantasy of yours, isn't it? You dreamed of having sex in this bed a hundred times I bet,” Kurt guessed, thinking of how many times he had thought about having sex in his own bed over the years. It was all different when he actually lived out that particular dream when Blaine came into his life. 

 

Blaine blushed a little, then grinned, saying, “More like a thousand...” under his breath, pulling Kurt closer and placing his lips on Kurt's, just to feel how good that was every time he did it. He moved his mouth, Kurt following suit, as they just kissed...slowly, tenderly, softly, thoroughly...knowing that was all they needed. Just that much contact was enough. Kurt couldn't think of how many times they had just sat in the family room on the sofa, maybe watching television or listening to music, and kissed or held each other. There was no rush to do more, no pressure to accomplish the next step. They could just enjoy the closeness they shared and be satisfied with that. They slept every night tangled together, Kurt often waking in the night to kiss Blaine and Blaine kissed him back, even when he didn't wake to full consciousness. They just knew each other that well, the promise the kiss held was enough.

 

Of course, that didn't mean they didn't enjoy sex, because they did. Blaine had been so worried that Kurt would get tired or bored with him, but it never seemed to happen. He was ready to kiss or hold or progress to other things any time Blaine suggested it, whether he spoke about it or just made the gesture, Kurt seemed to know what Blaine wanted or needed, they were that well tuned. It was like a miracle to Blaine that another person could know him so well.

 

“Kurt?” Blaine started to ask, but Kurt put his fingertip on Blaine's lips, kissing his cheek as he sat up. He began to unbutton Blaine's shirt, taking his time and touching his skin as he did it, making Blaine catch his breath. He should be unbuttoning Kurt's but that would tangle their arms together, Blaine knew from experience, so he sat quietly and listened to his heart beat faster in anticipation. 

 

Kurt pulled the shirt tail loose from Blaine's jeans, then ran his hand up to remove the shirt from his shoulders and place it at the foot of the bed where Blaine had laid his sweater when they came in. Blaine began removing Kurt's shirt and soon they were lying together, the scent of warm skin in Blaine's nose as he nuzzled into Kurt's neck. He took a long breath, loving the smell of lavender, and something spicy like cloves. Underneath the obvious scents of the products Kurt used was a fresh scent like spring rain and Blaine inhaled deeply that scent that epitomized Kurt for him. 

 

Kurt touched Blaine's shoulder, running his fingers along the ridge of muscle before exploring the bicep. Blaine worked out, the therapeutic value of moving his muscles was helping him with stress, and he did it a lot – lifting weights, boxing, yoga. It was paying off in the muscles he was toning and building in his body, the toned look was just a by-product, but Kurt loved to look at Blaine's naked body whenever he got the chance. 

He stroked down the forearm, feeling the tender skin on the under side of his arm and kissed the inside of Blane's wrist – getting a sigh and a moan as reward. He kissed his way across the palm and took Blaine's first finger into his mouth, sucking gently and running his tongue around in a swirl. Blaine's hips jerked a little and his golden-hazel eyes got that one shade darker as he looked into Kurt's blue-gray eyes.

 

They continued the dance, removing pieces of clothing and touching and kissing all that warm skin it exposed. They weren't expected for dinner, so there was no reason to hurry, and they took their time. Sometimes they just stopped and rested, Blaine's nose buried in Kurt's neck as he soaked in all the love Kurt had to give him.

 

“Do you think we'll get married one day?” Blaine asked Kurt. They had told each other how much in love they were, but Blaine had never been brave enough to ask this question, he was afraid of the answer – but it just seemed right to ask now.

 

“Yeah, I can see that. I've thought about it a lot, Blaine. I guess we need to talk about it, but haven't you felt all along that this is forever for us?” Kurt asked in return. 

 

“I do, Kurt, I never want anyone but you,” Blaine sighed and snuggled closer, pulling the blankets up around their shoulders against the cold air in the room. He had been dropping lazy kisses all down Kurt's chest, nuzzling against the soft skin for a while. Kurt hummed in contentment; but those kisses got more intense, wetter, harder, deeper and had more force behind them as he took Kurt's nipple gently between his teeth and then licked around it, delighting in the noise that came from Kurt's throat. With a happy grin, he moved to the other one and did the same, Kurt's arms tightening around Blaine as he shivered a little at the stimulation.

 

Blaine moved to the side of the bed and reached into his discarded sweater pocket, finding the little tube he had left in there from last week's impromptu drive out in the country. He kept it in his hand to warm up as he returned to his waiting boyfriend, continuing the kisses across Kurt's chest and down to give him a bite on that sexy hipbone. He traced the lines that ran near the hipbone and down in a V to the crevice between leg and body, following it with his tongue as Kurt relaxed a little to lay boneless on the bed, letting Blaine do what he would. It was not something Kurt had anticipated when they had first made the decision to move forward with their relationship. Oh, Kurt had wanted the feeling of being close, of cuddling and being easy with Blaine's presence; but he thought just the acts of sex would be the closeness he craved – he hadn't realized that while the thrill of sex was amazing, it was the cuddling and shared quiet time - or the days he could pour his whole heart out to Blaine and Blaine would listen and understand - that Kurt would come to value the most. It was being able to completely relax and put himself in Blaine's hands, and trust Blaine to take care of him in every way. That part of Blaine's love was so much more than just the immediate lust for sexual contact.

 

All of this went through his brain at lightning speed as the feelings of want and needs and sexual craving were quickly replacing any coherent analytical thought. Kurt had originally thought that when they had sex, it would always be fifty-fifty, that with each act Blaine shared with him, he would reciprocate in kind, immediately. But after a year, they had found that the exact equal balance wasn't always what they wanted. Some days it was only Kurt, giving Blaine everything he could take and the joy of knowing he had brought his love all that pleasure, that he had given until Blaine was undone and exhausted and sated – that was the best thing that could happen and it wasn't necessary for Blaine to do it all back to him right then. There would be time another day for Kurt to be the one lying in Blaine's arms, so tired from coming and coming that he could do nothing but hold on to Blaine as he fell into a deep sleep. It had come as a shock to Kurt that he cherished the times he was giving that pleasure to Blaine more than the times he was receiving it from him. 

 

“Kurt, where are you?” Blaine asked, looking at him with a puzzled face because Kurt's mind seemed to be far away.

 

“Oh, sorry....I was just thinking about what you said earlier, about us getting married one day. I want to, baby, so much. I want to wake up to you every day for the rest of my life,” Kurt smiled.

 

“I do, too,” Blaine whispered, kissing Kurt on his belly and getting a smile in return.

 

Blaine spread Kurt's legs apart, kissing the tender skin of his inner thigh as he moved his fingers along the other leg, slowly working towards the stiff cock waiting for him. He took the small tube and squeezed some of the now warm lubricant into his hand and smeared it across his fingers. Very gently he inserted one finger into Kurt, taking in a sharp breath when Kurt moaned his pleasure. Blaine was pushing his finger in with a gentle and slow movement, stroking Kurt's cock with his other hand as he went, eventually adding a second finger beside the first as he leaned forward to lap at the skin of his balls, sucking one into his mouth to move it with his tongue a little before doing the same to the other one. Kurt was listening to his heart as it tried to beat out of his chest at all the stimulation happening all at once. Blaine pulled his mouth back.

 

“Kurt, rub your nipples for me, pinch them a little the way you like me to do it,” Blaine instructed and hummed when Kurt complied. Blaine went back to licking the space behind Kurt's balls as he fingered him and stroked his cock. All of the stimulation was sending Kurt into a trance, all the raw sensation swirling in his lower back and into his belly with a fire he could feel building and building as his breath turned to panting in anticipation.

 

“Blaine, Blaine...stop. I want you, please, _pleasepleaseplease_....I want you inside me, baby...” he moaned as he reached down to try and tug Blaine closer to enter him.

 

“Okay, just a second,” Blaine said, smoothing the lubrication all over his cock in a thick coating, being careful because he was already so close to climaxing with Kurt's moans and sighs that filled the air. Blaine took Kurt's ankles and scooted his feet closer to his ass, giving him traction on the mattress, then spread his legs a little farther apart as Kurt moaned impatiently for Blaine to fill him.

 

“Okay, baby, here.....” Blaine whispered in a low voice as he lined up and began to push his cock into Kurt. There was a gasp, whether of surprise or lust Blaine couldn't tell, but he pushed slowly, waiting for Kurt to adjust every few seconds to make it easier until he was in. The look of lust on Kurt's face as Blaine pulled back and then pushed in was enough to make him hold his breath and close his eyes to keep from coming that second. 

Blaine stopped moving, waiting until he had himself under control but Kurt's muscles were squeezing again and Blaine had to move, the rhythmic thrusting still slow, but thrilling just the same. They had only done this a few times since Kurt's birthday and the newness coupled with the feeling of being so close was more than either of them could control.

 

“Oh....ahhhh..ahhh....Blaine....stop......I don't want to come yet...” Kurt blurted, a whine in his voice that stopped Blaine in mid-thrust as he leaned forward, Kurt moving so their mouths met to kiss and rest for a moment before he settled back down in the pillow and Blaine pushed back into the soft, tight depths of the boy he loved. Twice more they stopped to make it last longer, but the third time it was too much for both of them and the burning need took over as Blaine thrust deep and Kurt met him with each push and this time Blaine had found the right angle and depth to make it the best and it was all going to explode in fireworks.....there was that tiny fraction of time when everything was at the peak just before the end, a split sliver of a second where both of them felt it – and it was the best and most and they froze and let it come over them by its own volition.......then they were both throbbing and spilling and calling to each other with all their hearts as their lust burst forth for those few seconds in time. 

 

Then they were holding each other, Kurt curled into Blaine's side, his arms tight and Blaine was kissing the top of his head and whispering promises into his ear as he pulled the blankets once more around their ears, warm in their cocoon and safe from the world.

 

* * *

 

Several hours later, Kurt woke up, a bit confused at first when he didn't know where he was, just that Blaine was here with him – which was all that mattered – but curious where they were. Oh, yeah, in Blaine's old bedroom. Kurt sighed, knowing they had to rejoin the world, turn their phones back on, clean up before heading to their home in Lima. He wondered if they should talk about Sasha now or if it might be better to have someone else there – their friends Puck and Santana, or Grandma Sofie or Burt? He knew instinctively that bringing Blaine here was a good thing. He seemed so much more grounded when he played music and then the closeness of sex. Kurt laughed a little to himself, thinking how lucky he was that sex was one of the things that truly made Blaine feel better about himself. After making love like they just did, Blaine would be good for a week or more, no nightmares or PTSD spells usually. Maybe he should ask the therapist about that.

 

“Mmmmmm....Kurt...” Blaine mumbled in his sleep, giving his hips a thrust into Kurt's thigh. Kurt smiled. He hated to wake Blaine right now if he was having one of _those_ dreams...

 

“Yes, baby? Want more?” Kurt whispered into Blaine's ear, giggling.

 

“Yes...mmmmmm... suck me, Kurt....lick me....” Blaine mumbled, a smile blossoming across his face.

 

Oh, really? Wow, the things you learn when you listen to someone talk in their sleep. He lifted Blaine's hand and let it fall. Yeah, still sound asleep. “Where, baby? Where do you want me to lick you?” Kurt asked, snuggling closer to his very naked boyfriend.

 

“My cock. It feels so goood....your tongue is so warm....and wet....ahhhh..” Blaine sighed in his sleep.

 

“Okay, baby.” Kurt moved the blanket back, finding Blaine hard and ready. He put his lips on the head of Blaine's cock, running his tongue over the top before sliding down and taking as much as he could. He sucked a little, swirling his tongue before hollowing his cheeks and pulling back to see if Blaine was appreciating this. Blaine's eyes flew open along with his mouth, staring at Kurt before his mouth turned into a smile.

 

“I was dreaming about you doing that, Kurt. How did you know?” Blaine asked, still a little stunned as Kurt began to lick the under side like a lollipop and cup his balls in his hand.

 

Kurt gave a small laugh, “You asked me to.” 

 

Blaine's eyes got so huge it was comical. “I...I..what?”

 

“In your sleep, you asked me to suck your cock and lick you, your face was so sweet, I couldn't say no,” Kurt told him before taking Blaine into his mouth again. Blaine closed his eyes, twisting his fists in the blanket as Kurt got more serious in his quest to do what Blaine had asked for. It didn't take long, and Blaine was shouting Kurt's name as he filled his mouth, clenching his muscles tightly as Kurt swallowed as fast as he could and finishing by licking Blaine's cock in wide swaths until he had to tell Kurt to stop. They cuddled together again for a while, kissing and touching a little. 

 

“Let's get a shower?” Kurt suggested and they reluctantly got up and walked down the hallway to the bathroom, sharing the warm water and standing close as they washed each other before toweling off and coming back to the bedroom to get dressed. 

 

“Do you want to stay here or..?” Kurt asked, not sure how comfortable Blaine was.

 

“I'm okay here in the house, if that's what you mean. I don't want to go to the attic room, but other than that, I'm okay. Let's just go sit in the den. I always loved that room. It was my grandfather's …..oh, I guess I should say my great grandfather's room. You know we lived here with him when I was very little. He died when I was ten. I spent a lot of time with him, fishing or reading. He told stories about his adventures during the war – World War I. He was in the cavalry. C'mon, I'll show you,” Blaine said, taking Kurt's hand and going to the end of the hallway to a set of double oak doors and opening them up with a flourish.

 

“Nobody ever came in here much, either when he was living here and certainly not after he died. I would come to get away from my parents. Grandparents. Shit. It's messing my mind up to try and keep it straight: brother, parents, grandparents. Damn them,” Blaine shook his head as if that would order his thoughts.

 

“This is a wonderful room,” Kurt said, looking around. There were walnut paneled walls, two of the walls were bookcases and a large crystal light came from the ceiling. It was obviously an old gas light changed to be electric when the mansion was updated. There was a walnut desk dominating the corner farthest from the door with several overstuffed brocade chairs, one matching the velvet one in the attic room but in better condition. A leather chesterfield sat in front of the fireplace and French Aubusson rugs were scattered around the floor. On the walls not covered in bookcases were fishing poles, fly rods, and a rack of guns: shotguns, rifles and a few pistols all locked in the rack. Kurt turned to find a bear's head, mounted and growling with eyes bugging and teeth in a snarl. There were framed photographs of men on horses, mostly in uniform but a few taken in a hospital where most of the men had bandages and casts on various limbs. There was an old flag, folded into a triangle and displayed in a glass case on a shelf. Blaine let his hand touch the case and sighed as he walked around the room, looking at all the things he remembered from childhood. Kurt looked at the flag and read the little inscription on a brass plaque which said this was the flag from Captain George Breckville Anderson's casket. That must be the grandfather Blaine was so close to. 

 

Blaine steered Kurt over to the chesterfield, sitting down in the deep leather cushion and pulling Kurt close. He wasn't sure how he felt at that moment, it was a mixture of sadness at missing the man he had spent so many days with in this room with some excitement at being able to show Kurt the things he had left behind. There was the fear that would probably never leave Blaine when he thought of what had happened to him in this house, but also the nostalgia of good times spent mostly with Cooper. It all felt like too much and Blaine sank farther down in the cushions, nuzzling into Kurt's neck and just breathing as Kurt stroked his back, carding fingers through his curls. 

 

“You know I'll never leave you, Blaine. You're my life, my love. You know that. Don't you?” Kurt asked.

 

“Yes, and you are mine. Always.” Blaine whispered.

 

“Okay. But you need to think about something now, and it's important. You need to think about what you're feeling about Sasha. I know it's hard, but Blaine, I don't think this is going away. We don't have to do it right now, but we do have to talk about her soon.” Kurt said, hating himself for knowingly upsetting Blaine, but also sad it had to be done. Was there no end to the heart-wrenching things Blaine had to go through? He braced himself for whatever came next.

 

“Kurt, I have been thinking....and I need to talk it over with you because I trust you and I love you. It's about Cooper and Sasha....”

 

 


	10. Love Revisited

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to remind you, gentle reader, that this is AU. Alternative Universe. I do not condone having sex with children, even if said child is willing and the partner is also a child. In this case, the victim does not see himself as a victim and the event was 17 years in the past. That does not make it okay, but it's what happens in this fictional story. Emphasis on the FICTIONAL. Okay?

Cooper sat on the sofa in Sasha's house, waiting for her to call him for dinner, eyes closed as he remembered that summer before Blaine was born. 

 

 

“ _Sasha....I don't think this is right, is it?” eleven year old Cooper whispered, looking at his babysitter, his lover, lying on the blanket they had hastily thrown over the old mattress on the floor of the attic room. They had removed their clothes already and sat in a patch of sunshine._

 

“ _Does it feel right?” she had asked, taking his hand and bringing it to her breast, smiling up at him. “I don't want you to do anything you don't want to, but as long as I'm okay with it, there's no reason for you to think it's wrong. We love each other, don't we?”_

 

“ _Yes, my Sasha....” the boy cooed back at her, feeling very grown-up as he dared to move his hand over the soft skin, feeling the excitement of touching the dark pink nipple and the soft white skin around it. All he could think of was that he wanted to taste her, to lick that nipple and feel it get hard under his tongue; to squeeze and fondle the forbidden breasts. She must have known what he wanted because he could feel her hand slide up his back, caressing the back of his neck as she exerted a little pressure to bring his mouth down to her breast, and then he was licking it, running his tongue back and forth and taking it into his mouth to suck gently. Sasha made a noise that gave Cooper a warm feeling, gathering heat was swirling around, making him dizzy. “Sasha...” he managed to say, just a breath as he moved to the other breast to lick that one, too._

 

“ _Cooper, I need more. Please, I know you didn't want to do it yesterday, but you aren't as afraid today, are you?” she asked, and she was right, he wasn't. Or at least he didn't think he should be. He'd dreamed of doing this after she had taken his cock into her mouth – but he came so quickly then, they hadn't had time to try anything else as they had heard the housekeeper call up the stairs that lunch would be served._

 

“ _Sasha, have you done this with anyone else?” Cooper asked. It didn't matter, but he was a little afraid he might do it wrong, or come too quickly again and disappoint her._

 

“ _No. Just you, Cooper,” she assured him, but he didn't believe her. How could someone so beautiful, with her long red-gold hair and flashing green eyes, choose him? She could have any guy her own age or older he thought, so why him?_

 

_What he didn't understand was that Sasha didn't think she could have just anyone. She was shy at school and not very well liked because people took her shyness for aloofness, so she didn't have any boyfriends. She really did love Cooper. He might only be eleven, but he was mature for his age and was already going through puberty. She discovered this a few weeks ago when they were playing in the pool and she was twirling him around in the shallow end and he rubbed against her. It felt good so he did it again and she couldn't help but notice he was getting hard. She let her hand palm over the small bulge and the look on Cooper's face was amazing, sort of a mix between panic and ecstasy. She was so curious that a boy so young could get so hard, she slid her hand down his trunks and fondled his erection as he closed his eyes and tried not to let it end, but it did in a very short amount of time. It also resulted in them trying it again the next day, but up in the attic room for more privacy. It took over two weeks, but she talked him into exploring more each day, letting him touch her anywhere he wanted, touching him anywhere he asked her to._

 

_Cooper was almost as tall as she was and his arms fit around her perfectly when they stood face to face to kiss. Sasha craved love because she didn't get much at home, and Cooper was a snuggly, loving boy. She mistook this for him being in love with her. He did grow to love her over the summer as their relationship grew until she wanted this final act so much she had schemed for weeks how to do it. They had found the attic room and it was soon the place they spent all of their time – in exploring each others' bodies and sharing intimate moments._

 

_Sasha was growing impatient, so she reached over to stroke Cooper's cock. She had intended to do this yesterday, but just putting her mouth on it had brought the afternoon of love to an abrupt halt when he came too soon. She wasn't going to risk that today._

 

_A few strokes and Cooper was panting and whining in anticipation, so she pulled him on top of her, guiding his cock into the proper place and telling him, “Push, Cooper, push your cock into me, hard.”_

 

_And he did, thrusting as hard as his young body knew how, gasping at the sudden warmth, the tight clasp of her body as it enveloped him in slick-wet-hot and his hips bucked forward by their own volition. Sasha cried out in pain, which scared Cooper, but she put her hands on his lower back and held him tightly against her, and he was unable to pull out._

 

“ _Hold still for just a second, Cooper. Don't move, it will be okay in a moment,” she managed to say, trying not to cry. Cooper froze, terrified he'd hurt her._

 

“ _Okay, now pull out slowly and push in again....” she said in his ear as she kissed his neck. He followed her directions and that feeling came back, so he pushed in and pulled out a few more times, gaining momentum as he felt the fire building in his lower back and spreading through his body. “Ahhhh...Cooper....ohhhh...” she began to wail, making him push harder and faster until his vision clouded and he felt a hot burst as he came. He had always heard that lovers screamed each others' names as they came, but he was silent, feeling this new sensation and it wasn't until later that night he wondered if he had done it wrong if he hadn't screamed._

 

_After that, they had fucked on the mattress almost every afternoon, and if he had understood that he could impregnate her, he didn't think about it very much. She hadn't known much about how reproduction worked, but reasoned that Cooper was too young to be a father, so she didn't worry about it, either. Until it was too late._

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Cooper, dinner's ready if you want to come in the dining room,” Sasha's voice came from the room next to the kitchen.

 

Coop sat down at the table, smelling all the delicious odours emanating from the kitchen as Sasha came in, carrying two plates. 

 

“I hope you still like steak?” she asked, setting the plate down in front of Cooper. 

 

“Oh, you know I do. I remember grilling steaks in the summer out by the pool,” Cooper said, then laughed. “I wonder how many sentences tonight are going to start with one of us saying 'I remember...' ?” and Sasha laughed. They ate in companionable silence, smiling at each other as the evening went along. They finished dinner, cleaned up and washed the dishes together, sitting back on the sofa listening to soft music.

 

“Cooper, ah...I can take you to your office if you want. Are you really going to sleep there?” Sasha asked.

 

“It's not as bad as you are imagining. There are several sofas in my inner office that are as large as beds and there are blankets and pillows in the closet if necessary. I've slept there before,” he assured her. 

 

“I'm not much good at subtlety, Coop, I never was. So, can you handle me just being blunt?” Sasha asked, searching Cooper's blue eyes for a moment.

 

“I can.”

 

“You don't have to go back to your office unless you want to. You can stay here. I know if I was sensible I would let this wait and see what happened between us, but I can tell you, I care about you as much now as I did the day I took you to that attic room eighteen years ago - - and waiting a few days or a few weeks isn't going to change that. So, do you want to stay here with me tonight?” Sasha asked, still looking in his eyes. 

 

“Yes, Sasha, I'd love to stay here,” Cooper said, taking her in his arms as he had been thinking about the whole evening long. Their lips met and it was as if they had never said goodbye. She was still his Irish princess, he was still her blue-eyed beauty and they made up for all the time they had lost because of how unfair the world had always been to them.

 

 

* * *

 

“I don't know how I _should_ feel, Kurt. I don't know how I _actually_ feel. It is just kind of numb. I think maybe I should have jumped in her arms and been so happy I met my actual mother at last, but the truth is that all I wanted to do was run. She didn't seem like my mother, she was a complete stranger to me.” Blaine said into Kurt's chest as he sat in his boyfriend's lap, their arms intertwined. 

 

“I don't think you should feel any certain way. There isn't a chapter in Emily Post about how to greet your birth mother after being tortured and imprisoned by your grandmother...you have a unique situation and in my opinion, you don't have to think about it at all. You can wait until you're ready for it, Blaine, and she can wait on you. Okay?” Kurt advised, not sure at all how to help. 

 

“I guess you're right. I feel bad that the first thing I yell at her is to ask why she abandoned me. Oh, did you see Cooper's face? What did he do when I said that? I hope I didn't hurt him.” Blaine said.

 

“I wasn't watching him, I was watching you, baby. But he couldn't have been surprised. He knew what a shock all of it was to you when he told you to begin with,” Kurt added. “You were better when he told you he was your father because you already knew him and you already loved him. It was a definite shift in your paradigm, but you basically had a relationship with him.” Kurt moved a little, his leg falling asleep with Blaine's weight on it. Blaine got up and walked to the bathroom to get a drink of water. He had been sitting and talking to Kurt for the past few hours in their bedroom in the basement after coming home from the Anderson mansion. As luxurious as the mansion was, this felt more like home to him. 

 

Blaine went back into the room, sitting down in the desk chair and got out a piece of paper and a pencil. Drawing little shapes as he thought for a while. The little shapes turned into music notes as his fertile mind churned out a tune and he began humming to himself. Kurt stretched out on the bed, his purple silk pajama top riding up to show a strip of skin as he listened to Blaine hum. 

 

“You really enjoyed playing your instruments yesterday, didn't you?” Kurt asked. 

 

“Yeah, I did. It had been a long time. Would it be okay if I brought some of them here? I think there's room in the closet of the storage room for me to keep a few? I don't mean the harmonium or piano, but maybe the viola and violin?”

 

“Of course, I was going to suggest it myself,” Kurt said, happy that this had kept Blaine's interest. 

 

A clatter of footsteps was heard coming down the basement steps before Cooper burst in, picking Blaine up from where he sat in the chair and twirling him around.

 

“Wow..what brought that on?” Blaine asked when he was finally set back down.

 

“Guess where I've been since yesterday?” he asked the room at large.

 

“Sleeping at your office?” Kurt said, although from the ecstatic actions, he guessed Cooper had been somewhere else, and Kurt dreaded where that place had been.

 

“No. I have been at Sasha's house. Reminiscing.” Cooper grinned.

 

Blaine sat looking at Coop, the disapproval on his face apparent to Kurt, if not to Cooper.

 

Kurt looked back and forth between the two, hoping Coop would realize what Blaine was thinking before he said any more. But Coop was oblivious.

 

“I never thought I'd see her again, and then I found her and now we can be together!” Coop crowed.

 

Blaine gasped. Kurt frowned at Coop, wondering where he had left his brain. For a smart person, a lawyer for goodness sake, he was sure showing his immature and thoughtless side. 

 

“How could you? She just _threw me away_. Me, your son! She threw me away and you're back with her? She practically raped you, Cooper, when you were a fucking child - and you're happy to be with her? What's wrong with you?” Blaine shouted, bursting into tears and hitting Cooper with his fists until Kurt pulled him back, holding him tightly as he gasped for air and cursed.

 

“Hey, what's wrong with you, Blaine? I loved her, they took her away from me and I loved her the whole time. I've never stopped loving her...and she is your mother, Blaine, how can you be so angry?” Cooper was incredulous.

 

“How? Because of what she did and what she is. How can you just get back with her in the space of two days after all that has happened?” Blaine asked.

 

“It wasn't our fault, what my parents did. Now we have a chance to make it right, don't you see?” Coop tried to defend himself.

 

“No, no, I don't see. It is just one more crappy thing in my life where I am just a burden to those who should love me but don't. Apparently if she had never gotten pregnant, the two of you would have lived happily ever after like some fucking fairytale. But here I came along to ruin it for everyone. Get out, Cooper. Go back to that cradle robbing rapist and stay away.” Blaine turned to lay his head in his arms on the desk and cry. Coop tried to put his hand on Blaine's shoulder to calm him, but Blaine just jerked himself away. 

 

Cooper turned to Kurt, but didn't get any form of approval from that quarter. He looked into those ocean blue eyes, searching for understanding, but got nothing. Kurt shrugged, not sure what to say, not able to give Cooper any comfort in this case...and Cooper turned around and walked out, up the basement stairs and up to the room he stayed in when he was visiting the Hummels. He threw himself on the bed and put his head on his arms, getting out his phone to look at the picture he had taken of Sasha right before he left that morning. He began to think of some way to get Blaine to go and meet with her, not to run out the way he did the first time, but to sit and talk with her, so he could see for himself what a wonderful person she truly was. 

How sad was it that he hated his own mother? Well, not much different than when he hated the person he thought was his mother for so many years. Cooper closed his eyes, not knowing how to explain all of this, not knowing how the lives of the Andersons got so seriously messed up. 

 

 

* * *

 

 

Blaine was sitting on the bed, just staring into space and Kurt was a little worried. Blaine was probably okay, but any time he stared like that was a time to worry. Talking might help, but he would have to gauge Blaine's mood first, so he sat down on the bed, close to his boyfriend but not yet touching. He leaned forward and placed his hand on Blaine's arm, then jumped back as Blaine snapped around with a growl and jerked away from Kurt's touch.

 

“You okay, baby?” Kurt asked, although Blaine quite obviously was not.

 

“Hmmm?” Blaine looked at Kurt like he'd never seen him before.

 

“Are you feeling okay?” Kurt asked again and Blaine shook his head pretty hard. 

 

“Oh...yeah, Kurt. I'm fine. Just a little distracted, I guess. What's up?”

 

“What is up with you and treating Cooper that way?” Kurt asked, not sure how to address this new problem. Coop had been one of the rocks that Kurt depended upon with Blaine, someone Blaine would always respond to in times of stress. 

 

“What way?” Blaine asked, looking confused.

 

“You just practically bit him....over his excitement at seeing Sasha again. Don't you remember?” Kurt asked.

 

“No...but why? Did he find her?” Blaine was very obviously confused, so Kurt took him in his arms, swaying slowly back and forth as he kissed Blaine's forehead, down to his cheeks and on to his lips. 

 

“It's not important, baby. Let's go to sleep, okay?” Kurt wasn't sure why Blaine was acting the way he was, why his memory was slipping right then, but he attributed it to being tired.

 

“Okay, Kurt. I'm sleepy, can I sleep with you in your bed tonight?” Blaine asked. Kurt gave him a look, wondering if something was wrong. Blaine had been sharing his bed for a year, why would he ask that now? Well, tomorrow was another day and he would check it out then. He pulled back the covers and helped Blaine slide under them, pulling him close into his side and turning off the light.

 

“You can always sleep with me, baby. Are you feeling okay?” Kurt asked.

 

“Yeah, I'm just tired. Goodnight,” Blaine said in a soft voice, clutching tight to Kurt's chest. Kurt kissed him, first on the cheek, then on the lips and Blaine responded with a sigh into Kurt's mouth and fell asleep, his breath evening out as his muscles relaxed.

 

Not knowing what else to do, Kurt just rocked him in his arms like he would a baby, whispering to him that he was safe and loved and would never again be alone. Blaine smiled in his sleep as if he heard Kurt's words.

 

Several hours later, Kurt felt a tight pinch and jerked awake, realizing it was Blaine clutching at Kurt's arms and twitching in his sleep. 

 

“Blaine, honey, let go. You're fine, baby, I'm here with you...calm down,” Kurt murmured into Blaine's hair as he tried to loosen the fingers that were making Kurt's arms bruise. 

 

Blaine opened his eyes, but Kurt could tell that he wasn't seeing clearly. He closed his eyes again, falling into a fitful sleep as Kurt held him close.

 

A little while later, Blaine started screaming. Kurt was ready for it, the twitching earlier was an indication it would happen in the next few hours. Kurt had been sleeping much better the past week, Blaine hadn't had any nightmares at all, but now....

 

“Blaine, Blaine, baby, it's me. Wake up honey, you're having a nightmare. It isn't real, you're here with me,” Kurt started the mantra, stroking Blaine's back, rubbing his vertebrae and shoulder blades. “C'mon, baby, wake up,” he said.

 

Blaine burst up, jumping away from Kurt in a frenzy, struggling and screaming as Kurt tried to hold on. Blaine was rarely this violent, but Kurt had seen it before a few times, so he tried to calm him down. Nothing worked and as Kurt reached out, a crazed Blaine punched him in the jaw, knocking him across the bed as the pain immobilized him. Kurt lay for a moment, frozen in shock as Blaine continued to scream. He hit Kurt again, although this time it was just a glancing blow to his shoulder. Blaine had taken boxing lessons and his strong arms packed a strong punch, and it was painful. Kurt lay still as if he'd been knocked out, hoping Blaine would stop but he was still flailing and Kurt rolled off the bed to the floor and grabbed his phone from the bedside table. He dialed.

 

“Ahh...Kurt?” 

 

“Finn, come down here right now, Blaine is having a really bad one, he hit me and I can't stop him. Be careful, he doesn't know who he is right now, so he might try and punch you,” he breathed into the phone as he heard footsteps running across the hall above him and down the basement stairs. 

 

“Blaine!” he shouted to distract him as Finn came in the room, assessing the situation and crouching low before tackling Blaine around the knees to stop him, then pinning his wrists to the floor as he sat on top of the struggling boy. 

 

“It's okay, Blaine, it's me, Finn. You're okay, buddy, just sit still,” Finn said in a calm voice, holding Blaine still but as gently as possible considering the circumstances.

 

“I'm here, baby, relax, you're going to be okay,” Kurt said to him, cupping his cheek so Blaine would look at him and see who he was, but to no avail. Blaine struggled more, screaming and panting in fear as he tried to get loose. 

 

Softer footsteps were heard as Carole came into the room with her first aid kit. She prepared an injection and it took both Kurt and Finn to hold Blaine down as she administered it, but Blaine slumped into a relaxed state as the medication took affect. By this time, Burt, Carole, and Finn were all in tears, watching as Blaine cried and cried, shaking with fear as Kurt took his limp hand and then gently took his head into his lap, carding through Blaine's mop of curls and whispering to him. They put him back on the bed, covering him up while Burt took Kurt in his arms and pulled his head into his chest while Kurt let out his hurt and frustration un pitiful sobs. 

 

“Let me see your face, honey,” Carole said, turning Kurt's head toward the light as she looked at the place Blaine had punched him. She probed it, Kurt jerking away when she touched the sore part, but let her examine it.

 

“You're going to have a good shiner, Kurt, but the orbital bone is not broken. Where else did he hit you?” she asked. Kurt had that look of denial on his face, trying to believe that Blaine would not hurt him, but with so much evidence to the contrary, he was struggling with the whole thing now. He pulled up his pajama shirt and let her probe his ribs where Blaine had landed a right cross. It hurt like hell.

 

“You might have cracked a few ribs, but I think you'll be okay. It's going to hurt but I don't think any of them are broken. I'm going to strap them up, though, just in case,” Carole said and Burt helped his son remove his shirt. Finn sat down next to Kurt, a hand on his back in support.

 

“What can I do, dude?” he asked, concerned about his brother but not sure how to help. 

 

“You've done enough, Finn, thank you. I just can't stop him when he gets like that, he's too strong. You saved me from getting a worse pounding. Maybe you could...” Kurt stopped, afraid to ask what he wanted, Finn had already done enough and this was way out of his comfort zone. Kurt didn't want to ask, and Blaine was sedated, so he would probably be okay while Carole strapped his ribs.

 

“Come over here, Kurt. Burt, can you help hold him while I get the bandages out?” Carole directed. She had been a registered nurse for years, since Finn was a baby, but she was studying now to be a Nurse Practitioner and knew a lot more about things like strapping cracked ribs. They wouldn't have to go to the ER tonight, thank goodness.

 

“Kurt, I can do whatever you need. What is it?” Finn asked.

 

“It's not for me,” he answered, gritting his teeth as Carole grasped his arm and he felt the pain of where Blaine had scratched him. Carole looked at his face and turned his arm over to see the nasty scrape from Blaine's nails he had left on the under side of Kurt's arm. 

 

“For Blaine?” Finn asked and when he got a nod in response, he went to the bed and crawled under the covers, gathering Blaine close to his chest and whispering soft and comforting words into Blaine's ear. They all saw Blaine relax even more, curled close to Finn. 

“You're safe here with us, Blaine, we'll keep you safe, we won't let you be alone...” he whispered the way he had heard Kurt do it countless times before and was actually pleased with himself when Blaine hummed in contentment and relaxed against him.

 

Carole and Burt dressed Kurt's scrapes and bruises and Burt held his son, telling him how brave he was and how proud of him he was to keep trying for Blaine's sake. Kurt closed his eyes, his cheek nestled into the flannel of his dad's pajamas as the strong arms wrapped around him. 

Kurt finally looked up to see Cooper standing in the doorway, the stricken look on his face like another blow as Kurt realized Cooper knew what had happened. 

 

“Blaine did that to you, didn't he?” Coop asked, seeing the purple bruises spreading across Kurt's face. Cooper winced like it physically hurt him. He walked over to Kurt, cupping his chin so he had to look into his eyes. “This is too much for you, Kurt. You shouldn't be put in danger anymore. I need to get some help for Blaine, don't I?” The tears in Cooper's eyes tore at Kurt's gut.

 

“No, Coop. He usually doesn't do this. I was off my guard since he's been so good lately. I didn't realize how upset he was today. Please don't have him put in one of those hospitals, Cooper. That would be the ultimate betrayal to him. He's terrified to be locked up and that's what will happen if you take him there. Please, Cooper, please?” Kurt begged.

 

“I know what caused this, it was me – taking him to see Sasha when he wasn't ready, wasn't it?” Coop asked, but he already knew the answer.

 

“We can't shield him from everything,” Burt said. “We talked this out a long time ago, and we are willing to keep Blaine here, no matter what. Carole can administer a sedative when he needs it, but honestly, Cooper, he's only needed it less than a dozen times in over a year. Something must have triggered it tonight, but as you can see, he's going to be okay. I'll call his therapist in the morning and we can see what needs to be done. For now, let's all get back to bed.”

 

Cooper went over and ran his fingers over Blaine's cheek. “I love you, Blaine,” he said and Blaine smiled in his sleep. 

 

Burt hugged Kurt very gingerly and Carole took one more assessment before closing her case and getting ready to go back to bed. Finn gently moved away from Blaine, who grabbed at him in his sleep, and got out of bed. He helped his brother to take his place next to the sleeping Blaine.

 

“Thanks, Finn. You're the best,” Kurt said, smiling at his brother.

 

“No problem. Call me if you need me again,” he said and they all went back upstairs leaving Cooper sitting on the side of the bed.

 

“Kurt, this was because of me, I know it. What do I do now?” Cooper asked, at a loss once again to know what was best for his son.

 

“Blaine acted like he had never met Sasha when we went to bed. I wanted to talk about her, but he just shut down. Maybe it was too much. We can talk to his doctor tomorrow and find out the best thing to do. I had talked to him a little bit about it earlier, and he was upset. He was okay with finding out about you being his father, but he already had an established relationship with you – he already loved you. He looks at her as someone that abandoned him,” Kurt put up his hand to stop Cooper as he began to defend Sasha. “Coop, I understand there were extenuating circumstances, I do, but that is not how he sees it right now. I think we have to give him some time.”

 

Cooper's head dropped down in defeat. “Okay, Kurt. I agree with you. I think I might go back to New York for a while. I do need to take care of some things and that will give Blaine some space.”

 

“Don't just disappear, okay? Come and tell him you're going. He has abandonment issues already, don't make them worse. He loves you, you know,” Kurt said, hoping Cooper understood.

 

“I know, Kurt. I'll talk about it for a week or so, then go for a while. I think I need to clear my own head about all of this, too. And I know you'll take care of Blaine,” he said. “Goodnight, Kurt.” 

Cooper leaned down and kissed his son on the top of his head, then did the same to Kurt, getting a smile. 

 

“Good night, Cooper.”

 

 

* * *

 

“Kurt!!! Oh, my.......Kurt!!” Blaine was yelling, shaking Kurt as he gasped.

 

“Blaine? What's wrong, baby? You're okay...” Kurt started, although he was half asleep.

 

“No, it's not a nightmare. It's eight thirty in the morning. What happened to you?” Blaine gasped again, seeing the rest of Kurt's face as he sat up. 

 

“Oh, this? Nothing. Just a little accident,” Kurt said, clearly not prepared for questions about the state of his face with so little sleep.

 

“Oh....” Blaine's face fell. “I did it, didn't I?”

 

“Ah...well, yeah. But don't worry, I'm fine. It looks much worse than it feels.”

 

Blaine turned in bed, his arms going around to hold his boyfriend - and felt Kurt's sides - -and the bandages on his ribs. His face went pale.

 

“Oh my gods.....Kurt? What did I do?” Blaine sounded wounded.

 

“You had a bad nightmare, I wasn't aware of how bad and I wasn't careful,” Kurt explained. Blaine's hand came in contact with his own hip and he felt a sore place. 

 

“Carole had to sedate me, didn't she?” he asked, feeling the little knot under his skin where the needle had gone in. He looked at his boyfriend and at the damage he had done to his beautiful face. He turned away, towards the wall, knowing he didn't deserve to be anywhere near the boy he loved with all his heart. He buried his face in his arms and wanted to cry, but the tears just wouldn't come. 

 

“Hey, baby, it's okay. I really am fine. We just need to talk to the therapist to see what caused this and go from there,” Kurt tried to reassure Blaine.

 

“I need to be locked up. I'm a danger to you, did I hurt anyone else?” Blaine said in a monotone, devoid of any emotion at all.

 

“No, baby. Finn came down right away and Carole and Dad. They helped you through it, Cooper came, too. We all only want the best for you. We'll talk to the therapist today and work it out. We will take care of you, Blaine. Don't worry, nobody is angry with you, we all just want to help. Okay?” Kurt reassured him. 

 

Blaine curled up in a little ball, ashamed of himself. He knew it wasn't something he could control, hell, he'd been going to therapy for over a year now, but knowing it in his head didn't make his heart feel any better when he looked at what he'd done to Kurt. 

 

“How about some breakfast?” Kurt asked, trying to sound upbeat.

 

“I'm not really hungry. I just want to catch a few more minutes of sleep if that's okay?” Blaine said.

 

“Okay, baby. I'll be upstairs if you need anything. We'll call the therapist this morning and figure out what needs to be done, how you will feel comfortable, okay?”

 

“Yeah,” Blaine mumbled, closing his eyes in silent torture as the vision of Kurt's bruised face and bandaged ribs flickered through his mind. He kept his eyes screwed tightly closed so no tears could come out until he felt Kurt kiss his cheek and then go upstairs presumably to breakfast.

 

 

After a while Kurt came down to check on Blaine, but Blaine was adamant he wanted to stay in bed for a while longer. 

 

“I need to go down to the shop to help dad with some paperwork, baby. Do you want to come and just sit in the office with me?” Kurt asked, a hopeful look on his face.

 

“No, I'm exhausted from the past few days, Kurt. I just want to rest. Why don't you go get that done and we can go for a walk when you get back?” Blaine suggested. Kurt reluctantly agreed, happy Blaine showed at least a little interest in getting out of bed. He leaned over to brush his lips across Blaine's and was surprised when Blaine held him closer, deepening the kiss from gentle to desperate – clutching at Kurt and holding him so tightly that Kurt had to struggle to breathe, his ribs on fire. Blaine let him go just as quickly, turning to the wall and saying goodbye.

 

“Are you sure you're okay, Blaine? I can stay here with you if you need me. The paperwork can wait.”

 

“No, go get it done. Like I said, I'm tired. We can do something when you get back.”

 

“Okay. Finn is already at the shop, Carole is at a class, so if you need me, just call – or Puck is just a phone call away, you know. Santana, Lauren...call if you need someone. Leave your phone on, I'll call you to check in an hour or so.”

 

 

* * *

 

With everyone gone, Blaine got out of bed. He had some things forming in his head all morning and Kurt being out of the house afforded him the freedom to do them. He got the big backpack he used for hiking out of the back of the closet and began to fill it. Just rugged clothes, nothing fancy. He got dressed in jeans, a henley, wool socks, stout hiking boots, and his pea jacket. Upstairs he got some food and filled the rest of the backpack, adding a few bottles of water and called a cab. He had taken a roll of bills out of his drawer and stuffed them in his pocket. 

 

 

A mile from town to the south of Ft Shawnee, he got out of the cab and took another, backtracking a ways into a small town and then got a bus ticket to a place north of Lima. He didn't want Lauren to be able to track him this time. Eventually, he got off the bus, which he had paid for with cash, and walked the last few miles. He hadn't been here for a while, but found his way into the forest scrub between the river and the highway, pulling the heavy backpack into the cave behind himself, dropping the branch he'd used to brush over his footsteps into the hazelnut brush. It was February, but it hadn't snowed in a while, so no footprints were actually visible through the path. He sat down on a rock and caught his breath.

 

 

Sitting in the dark cave started to give him that closed-in feeling, so he pulled the pack back over his shoulder and began walking down the tunnel, past the oak door and on until he got to the stairway. He had expected to feel fear and a lot of other things going back to the mansion, but really, he didn't feel anything. He was tired, but that was from the exertion of walking. He got to the top of the staircase and hit the mechanism to open the panel in the library, wondering why Cooper hadn't done anything to secure this entry a bit better. But then, he was kind of glad he hadn't or it would have been tougher to get in. The alarm system logged what time it was accessed.

 

Blaine didn't want to bring attention to the place, so he just used the flashlight to find his way down the inside stairs to the second floor. He went into his bedroom, laid his pack on the floor, and walked to the linen closet for clean sheets for his bed. After making the bed, he laid down and just went to sleep. He couldn't bear to think about all the things that were in his mind, so he ran away from them by sleeping.

 

Several hours later, he woke up in a sweat, on the floor cowering under the bed. He shook his head, wondering for a minute how he'd gotten here. Oh, the nightmares. And Kurt wasn't here to comfort him or wake him up. He had never felt so alone, not even the days of being locked in the attic room. But he had to keep Kurt safe, like Kurt had kept him safe for so long. He could do this, for Kurt. 

 

 

Kurt got home from the garage, not hearing Blaine so he closed the door to the basement to let him sleep a little longer, and began to gather ingredients to cook dinner. Burt and Finn walked in about the same time as Carole got home and they sat in the family room, just chatting about their day. They had noticed Blaine's absence and Burt told them he had spoken with the therapist. She did not recommend that Blaine be changed to an inpatient given his fear of imprisonment, but she did want to see him the next day to talk over the trigger for the recent nightmares. After calling Kurt, she agreed that the stress of meeting Sasha was probably the thing that brought it on, and perhaps an adjustment in medication was all that was needed. Kurt was anxious to tell Blaine the good news, and dinner was almost ready, so he headed down to the basement with a smile on his face.

 

They all heard the gasp and Kurt's shout, “Daddy?”

 

Burt was up and taking the steps two at a time to get to Kurt, rushing into the bedroom, afraid of what he might find. He was relieved that Blane wasn't lying bleeding on the floor....but then, where was Blaine? Kurt was standing by the closet door, looking at a row of empty hangers, the empty dresser drawer open beside him, tears running down those pink cheeks. 

 

“Where's Blaine?” Burt asked stupidly.

 

“I don't know, Dad. He took some clothes and the backpack and.....” Kurt walked over to the drawer and opened the small one on top, moving the contents aside. “And his money.”

 

“But why?” Burt asked, feeling Carole put her hands on his shoulders from behind him. 

 

“I don't know. He did this once before, the first day he was here. He went back to get his money so he wouldn't be a burden on us. But why would he go now?” Kurt looked like he was in shock and Carole stepped forward, pressing him to sit on the bed as she took his pulse. She looked worried.

 

“Honey, did he say anything to you this morning?” she asked Kurt.

 

“He was upset about the bruises, but I told him everything was fine, under control, and I would be okay. I reassured him he would not have to leave here, no matter what. All he wanted to do was stay in bed. I bet he was planning this all along. Oh, my poor Blaine,” Kurt sobbed in to Carole's shoulder.

 

“I'll call Lauren and Puck, they can help find him, Kurt,” Finn had followed his mom down the stairs and reaching for his cell phone. 

 

“Kurt, have you looked in a mirror?” Burt asked his son.

 

“No...” Kurt said, standing up to see into the mirror over his dresser. He drew in his breath in a hiss. The dark purple that covered his left side was terrible to look at. It went from the orbital bone around his eye across his cheek, down to his jaw and pooled down his neck. Blaine had a wicked right cross, honed by a hundred hours of practice on the punching bags at the gym, and he'd hit Kurt with all his force. Kurt had known it hurt a lot today, but he had no idea how bad it looked. No wonder Blaine was so upset. 

 

“That's why he left. Oh, my stars....and then he felt the bandages around my ribs,” Kurt continued. Carole came over and said she needed to check those and Burt once again helped take off Kurt's shirt so Carole could unwind the bandages. Kurt's ribs were covered in purple bruises and he shied away from Carole's touch as she tried to assess the damage. 

 

“I know it's sore, but I don't think any of them are broken. That doesn't stop them from hurting, I know, but you'll be okay,” she decreed, leaving off the bandages so Kurt could shower. “Go ahead and get cleaned up, Puck should be here in a little while,” Carole said, getting up to go upstairs.

 

Sitting at the dinner table, nobody had an appetite. They were waiting on Puck and Lauren and Cooper to come over. Kurt didn't even pretend to pick at his food. He called the cab company to see if a cab had picked up anyone at this house – and found Blaine had headed out of town to the south. It was all he could do not to jump in his Navigator and head out to look, but Burt talked him into waiting. Cooper flew in the front door, banging it shut as he hurried to the table, looking anxiously around.

 

“No, we haven't heard anything. I found out a cab picked him up and took him towards Ft Shawnee, so I guess we start there?” Kurt said, but he sounded kind of hopeless.

 

There was a knock at the door and Finn went to let Puck and Lauren in. Puck went straight to Kurt and wrapped his arms around him.

 

“How are you holding up?” he asked, Burt staring at them. He gave his wife a 'when did this happen?' stare, but Carole brushed it away.

 

“I'm scared. It was bad enough last time, but he's more familiar with things now, and that means he might go further. Kurt turned and Puck got a good look at his face, stepping back a few steps as he took in the ravaged looking bruises.

 

“Oh, my goodness....he did that, didn't he?” Lauren asked, reaching out but not actually touching Kurt's face. He flinched anyway. 

 

“He didn't know he was doing it. He was in the middle of a nightmare and I didn't see he was so far out of it. It was my fault for not being more careful,” Kurt lamented. Lauren hugged him, but he flinched even more. She gave him a look that said 'spill'. Kurt lifted his shirt, showing her the bruises. 

 

“He must be feeling awful. Okay, what do we know for certain?” Lauren asked.

 

“He left here about 1:30 this afternoon with his backpack full of clothes and food, and maybe a thousand in cash. He has his wallet, so credit cards, too. A cab picked him up outside the house and took him to Ft Shawnee. They let him out at the side of the road. That is all we know for sure. That and he doesn't want to be found,” Kurt said.

 

“Let me make a few calls, I'll be right back,” Lauren excused herself.

 

“What are the chances he went back to the mansion, that's where he went last time, isn't it?” Puck asked. 

 

“Ft Shawnee is south, the mansion is north, up towards Bluffington, that doesn't make sense,” Finn interjected, a puzzled look on his face.

 

“Exactly,” Puck said. “He's trying to throw us off. He went south only to turn north, like a fox. I say we go look around the mansion.” 

 

Carole looked at Cooper. He had been silent this whole time. 

 

“Puck, have you seen anyone around there at all?” Coop asked. Puck had been hired as the caretaker for the place. He shook his head no. “Well, keep an eye out. I know you usually don't go inside much, but maybe increase your patrol, and do it four times a week now instead of once, okay?”

 

“Sure, Cooper. No problem. Want me to check out the tunnel, too?” Puck asked.

 

“Naw. I think I'll go there now,” he said just as the front door opened and Santana stepped into the room. Puck brought her up to date and she left with Kurt and Cooper to look at the tunnel. Puck left to look inside the mansion after Lauren reported that her father would have cops watching out for Blaine on all the roads out of Lima. 

 

They all headed out, the silence in both cars was deafening. Kurt was quiet, but determined to find Blaine, sure he could get him home by evening and they would talk all of this out. The car ride to the mansion was taking forever. They parked just north of the path to the tunnel entrance while Puck drove on to the gates and went in. They had agreed to meet in the middle.

 

 

Finn got out, stretching his legs and holding out a hand to Lauren as Puck got out the driver's door. Once Puck had punched in the new code, he turned on the lights and they began the search, floor by floor, looking for anything out of place, but found nothing until they went in Blaine's room.

 

Cooper, Santana, and Kurt disembarked and walked up the trail, looking for any trace of footprints in the path as they approached the tunnel entrance. To Kurt, it was like a bad dream and he ended up leaning heavily on Santana as they walked up the tunnel to the inside staircase.

 

“Buck up, listen to Auntie Smurf, we'll find your Prince,” Santana said to Kurt, getting a small smile from him. She may tease, but he knew she was worried, too. They searched as they walked, looking for anything that was disturbed or left behind. Upon entering the house itself, they heard Finn, Puck, and Lauren walking up the stairs. 

 

Puck was smiling, reaching out to grab at Kurt's arms as they met in the hallway. “I found fresh sheets on his bed, Kurt, he must be here!”

 

Kurt's face fell. He looked a the bright eyes of all of his friends and shook his head.

 

“No, Puck. We were here a few days ago, on the way home from the meeting with Sasha and we stayed a while,” he blushed. “We ah.....” he just couldn't finish what he was saying.

 

“You got wanky because you were alone? So you could howl and nobody would hear? Well, I guess I can't really blame you, Pretty Pony. The Prince looks good, I bet he can put on a show.” Santana said. Kurt glared at her.

 

“Let's just leave it at 'we put fresh linen on the bed' and leave it at that. There wasn't anything else?” Kurt looked hopeful.

 

“No, nothing else.” Cooper sighed. “We looked in every room, but...well, we thought finding that was proof he'd been here. Do you want to look, Kurt?”

 

“No. I just want to go home and wait. I bet he comes home soon. His phone is still on, I've left him a hundred texts, maybe he'll see sense.” But Kurt's heart wasn't in it. He was beginning to lose hope. He walked back up the stairs and hit the sconce to open the panel and began the walk back to the car, Cooper and Santana following.

 


	11. Found!

 

Blaine sat in the Listening Room, his backpack digging into his thigh. He had heard Puck coming up the stairs and grabbed his backpack, tiptoeing into his great grandfather's den and into the Listening Room to hide. He had forgotten this room was here, made by his ancestors at the time of the tunnel. 

Listening Rooms were common during the Civil War era. He had found it about the same time he'd found the escape tunnel and by the same means: Nathaniel Anderson's journal. Unfortunately, the room was very small and dark and had no other exit. Blaine could feel it closing in on him, shrinking small and his fear growing in size to devour him. He took a deep breath, trying to stem the panic until they left. Lying down as close to the floor as possible, he pulled the panel up a tiny bit to let in light and air, shoving his nose close to the slit until he heard them leave. 

 

 

* * *

 

Back at the Hummel house, they sat around the table once more, Kurt dialing Blaine's number, but now the phone was off. He sighed. Lauren's uncle and father had no good news, nobody had heard from or seen Blaine, and they were all depressed and out of ideas. Kurt just wanted to go to sleep, to lay in the bed and inhale the pillow that smelled like Blaine, to forget his worry and his anguish. And try not to blame this all on Cooper.

 

Kurt didn't need to blame Cooper, Coop was doing enough of that himself. If only he could have taken it slower, if only he had waited until one shock was absorbed before delivering the next one, if only.... He was feeling worthless and guilty. 

 

“I think it might be best if I leave. I'm going to stay in Columbus for a week, then go back to New York for a while. Blaine might come back if he knows I'm not here,” Coop said. Nobody argued. Kurt started to say something, knowing Coop would feel terrible if he left, but Kurt just didn't have the strength to do it. 

 

It was Santana that saw Kurt was at the end of his rope and took him by the hand, guiding him downstairs. Finn made a move to help, but she waved him back and he let her do it. He took his mom upstairs with Burt and settled her in bed. She was almost as devastated as Kurt, her maternal instinct goading her to new levels of guilt and worry. Burt sat with her, holding her hand for a while, then climbing into bed and gathering her close, stroking her face until she fell asleep. 

 

Finn came back downstairs to talk to Puck and Lauren, making plans to search the little towns to the south of Lima in the morning. Finally, Finn left a note and went home with Puck and Lauren to Puck's house. 

 

Down in the bedroom in the basement, Santana sat with Kurt, holding his hand. He didn't say a word and Tana wasn't the kind to wring it out of him. She asked if she could do anything, but he just shook his head, sitting still on the edge of the bed. She took pity on him and removed his clothes, for once not saying anything off-color or sexual as she folded his jeans and hung up his shirt, taking off his undershirt and jewelry, and finally his boxers. She guided him into the shower, removing her own things and helping him into the spray of water, washing his hair and body. There was nothing sexual or erotic about it, just a calming thing as Tana finished with the soap and rinsed him, then herself, toweling them dry. She borrowed a pair of Blaine's pajamas, got Kurt into his, and led him to bed. He never said one word the whole time. 

 

“I can leave, I can go to sleep in the other bed, or I can stay here with you, Kurt. What do you need from me?” she asked and Kurt held out his arms, like a small child asking permission for his mama to pick him up. She drew back the blankets and sheet, waiting for him to get in bed before climbing in next to him and laying in the position of the big spoon, kissing his temple and carding her fingers through his hair until he sighed in a small amount of contentment. He knew she understood, and he was so grateful for it. After a while they shifted position and Kurt's cheek was cushioned on Santana's breast. He might have been uncomfortable with that, but it felt like his mama and she smelled like Blaine since she was wearing his pajamas, and he fell asleep knowing she would watch out for him in the night. 

 

At about two in the morning, Kurt awoke with a start, and reached to gather Blaine closer to him, but all he found was Santana, and although he was grateful that she was there with him, he cried because she wasn't Blaine. He had failed Blaine and now he wondered if he would get him back. 

 

 

Things only spiraled into a deeper depression with Kurt. He went to school, doing his lessons and interacting with his friends a little, but the veil of sadness was getting worse. He had attached himself to Santana, who looked out for him at school and often slept with him at night, holding him as he cried. Some nights Puck or Lauren or Finn stayed with Kurt, all of them scared he might do something stupid. 

Kurt had never done anything to harm himself, no cutting or eating problems, no drug or pot abuse, no alcohol. The depths of depression were evident in him, and nobody was fooled into thinking it would get any better unless Blaine came home. 

 

Their friends had put together flyers and distributed them all over the county, but there was never any response. A week turned into a month, which turned into two months. April came with flowers budding and warm showers that washed the air clean. Renewed hope came to the world as it did every spring, but it didn't come to Kurt, and his melancholy didn't change. Cooper had moved back to New York, the hurt and despair of losing Blaine once again was too much. He still called several times a week, he offered a huge reward to anyone passing along information as to Blaine's whereabouts, but there was nothing. 

 

 

* * *

 

At the Anderson mansion, Blaine was playing the piano. He was burying himself in the music, enjoying the only thing he ever enjoyed anymore. He was lonely, but he was used to being alone. With the noted exception of the year he spent with Kurt, he had spent his teen years alone. The nights were so bad...he missed Kurt so much that he cried every night, it hurt so much it was a physical pain. But he couldn't go back. He loved him too much to put him in danger once again. When Blaine closed his eyes at night, the vision of Kurt's bruised face swam in front of his eyes. 

 

Blaine left out of the tunnel and walked to the grocery store down the road. He was afraid at first that someone might recognize him, but he finally lost the fear after he'd done it so many times. He looked in a mirror one morning and he could tell from the beard he had grown and the long hair that he didn't look like himself. 

 

For the most part, the mansion was quiet. He could hear Puck when he came to walk through the house and he hid in the Listening Room until Puck left. Puck had started by coming several times a week, but now only once, on Saturday mornings. He was easy to avoid. 

 

 

* * *

 

“Want to come with me to walk through the Anderson Place?” Puck asked Kurt, hoping to get him to do something like leave the house on Saturday morning. 

 

To Puck's surprise, Kurt agreed. He wasn't anxious to go anywhere but the thought that he might hold the viola in his hands...that might make him feel better. So, he got dressed and met Puck for the drive out to the mansion.

 

Pulling up in front of the mansion, he was brought back to the day he first came here, helping Puck mow the grass and finding the little pigeon caught in the roses and sporting a message. Maybe this was a mistake. It was that scrap of fabric, with the words scrawled in blood that took him to Blaine and his life was turned upside down. He thought about just waiting in the truck now, but it was cold and he wanted to feel the wood of the viola under his fingers.

 

Puck opened the door, punching the buttons to deactivate the alarm before walking into the kitchen. Kurt smelled something...bacon? It wasn't a strong smell, it was very faint. 

 

“Puck, you're the only one that comes here, aren't you?” Kurt asked.

 

“Yeah, well, Cooper sometimes, but he hasn't been here in over a month. I walk through on Saturday mornings, but otherwise it's empty. Why?”

 

“I smell bacon. Did you cook anything here?” he asked.

 

“No, I never do. Plus, I keep kosher since I live with Grandma Sofia, so no pork. I bring a lunch sometimes, but mostly I just get a sandwich or something at the diner down the road before I leave for Lima. Hey, I do smell the bacon, though...” Puck began to sniff around, looking in the kitchen, but there wasn't a dish out of place. 

 

Except a plate in the sink, rinsed but not washed and a fork sitting beside it.

 

“He's here, Puck. I know it,” Kurt's eyes lit up. 

 

“Be quiet, Kurt. If he's been hiding all this time, then he'll run if he hears us. Now, he probably knows we're here, but we'll act like we don't know and trap him,” Puck whispered. They walked through the house as though they were just looking, but not expecting much. Kurt heard something, but just nudged Puck, who obviously heard it, too. They walked up the stairs to the second floor, past Blaine's bedroom. 

 

* * *

 

Blaine had heard Puck's truck arrive like it did every Saturday, but Blaine had forgotten what day it was. He was sick. What started as a cold had gone into a full respiratory infection and the cold air in the mansion made it worse. He'd spent the last few nights wrapped in extra blankets coughing and wheezing. Last night had been the worst, his chest hurt, his eyes were sore, his throat was raw. On top of that, he'd had the worst nightmare since being in the house. It involved his grandfather and the day they had dragged him into the attic room, his grandmother hitting him as they screamed at him to get in there, then hearing the door latch lock behind him. He woke up in a sweat, screaming and crying and too tired to stay awake, so the nightmare came back. This time it was Kurt, beaten and sitting broken and bleeding, all of it being Blaine's fault.

He heard Puck and knew he had to get into the Listening Room to hide. He made it down the hall and fell trying to get in before Puck opened the door. He scrambled into the tiny space, quickly falling back asleep as he waited for Puck to leave.

 

* * *

 

“This was his great grandfather's room, Puck. We sat here in front of the fire that last day. Oh, Noah, I'd give anything if I could just have one more day with Blaine. Oh, my stars I miss him,” Kurt went over to the chesterfield and sat down. He closed his eyes and let his memory take over. 

 

“I'll just do the tour upstairs, Kurt, you can wait here and I'll be back in a few minutes. I'll take you to breakfast, okay?” 

 

“Sure, Puck, thanks,” Kurt mumbled as Puck left the room. 

 

Sitting there, he turned his thoughts to Blaine and the days they had together. He still didn't understand why he'd left and Kurt blamed himself, he blamed Cooper, he blamed the world. He thought about what he might have done differently, but he couldn't think of anything specific. 

 

Blaine was in the Listening Room with the walls coming down on him, closer and closer and Blaine held his breath, dozing off from time to time. He wanted to crack open the panel, this room was too small, but he couldn't. It was hot and close...Blaine closed his eyes and started to drowse again. He jerked up in a panic, his illness-induced sleep filling his head with nightmares and he screamed.

 

“Blaine!!! Puck, it's Blaine!!!!” Kurt shouted, running into the hallway to find him, scared it was just imagination, but still hearing the screams. It was farther away from here, so he went back in, Puck coming in behind him and looking around as he heard Blaine's screaming get louder.

 

“Blaine! Blaine! Where are you? I'm here, baby, tell me where you are!!” Kurt was shouting, shaking with the anxiety of it, aching to feel Blaine's skin under his hands, hurting to touch him once again. Blaine's screams went on and on as Puck went out to another room and came back in, puzzled as to why it was loudest in here. The panel in the library upstairs made it's way into Puck's brain and he realized there must be one here, too. 

 

“Look at the walls, Kurt, it must be another hidden place. Look to see what doesn't fit...”

 

The two moved to the wall where they could hear Blaine the loudest and began a detailed inspection, Kurt finding the panel first. They tried to open it, grasping at the edges and making their fingers bleed as they gouged at the oak boards. 

 

“Blaine, help me, help me find you, baby...BLAINE!” Kurt yelled in desperation and finally, a slit began to show under a panel and Puck stuck his fingers under it, lifting as it revealed the tiny room and the boy inside. Kurt launched himself at Blaine, dragging him out of the tiny space as he screamed, completely hysterical. But it was Puck's strong arms that held Blaine, motioning Kurt to sit on the chesterfield as he laid Blaine down, his head in Kurt's lap as Kurt carded his fingers through Blaine's hair, kissing his face and telling him to wake up, it was only a dream. 

 

It was like walking through clouds, his sense of reality skewed and Kurt's strong fingers holding his tightly, Puck's arms holding him safe, before Blaine would open his eyes. He was burning with fever, dry with dehydration, and almost hallucinating when they put him in the truck, Kurt's arms holding him, Kurt's lips kissing him as he was taken to the hospital where Carole met them, taking Blaine into a room to insert an IV. After the hellish two months living almost alone once again, Blaine wasn't letting go of Kurt. He wouldn't answer any questions, refused to speak at all, just held on to Kurt as he waited to see what would happen to him.

 

“Blaine, what happened? I don't understand, why did you leave me? What did I do? Please tell me, Blaine, so I never do it again. Please?”

 

But Blaine just lay there, holding on and knowing he would now be locked in one of those hospitals for the insane, where he would never be able to see Kurt again. He was terrified. 

 

* * *

 

“He has pneumonia, but he'll recover just fine. We can take him home in a few days, as soon as he's rehydrated and his fever is down,” Carole told Burt and Kurt as they waited outside the room. Finn got up and walked towards Kurt, throwing an arm over his brother's shoulders and smiling.

 

“See, I knew it would be okay, Dude. You never lost hope and now he's back. I hope he can tell us why he did it, though. I thought he was happy with our family,” Finn spoke. 

 

“I don't know, Finn. He doesn't seem able to tell me, he's hardly said two words. I'm worried it's about those bruises he gave me, I'm glad they're gone now, maybe he can forget them, too.”

 

 

Blaine was released after a few extra days to see his therapist. Burt came to take him home later, Kurt and Finn were at school, Carole was at her classes, and Burt thought it might be easier for Blaine to come home to a quiet house.

 

“You okay, kid?” Burt asked, genuinely concerned.

 

“Yes, sir, Burt.” he answered. Burt didn't have the heart to correct him this time.

 

“Kurt is excited to have you home. You do consider it your home, don't you?” Burt asked.

 

“Yeah, I do. I won't go back to the mansion. I won't leave again, now I've seen what it did to Kurt,” Blaine told him.

 

“Can I ask..what made you do it? Why did you leave?” Burt wanted to know. He'd been coached by Carole not to upset the boy, but some things were more important, and Burt figured he better ask what was wrong now or he'd never find out once Kurt and the rest were coddling the boy.

 

“I was afraid. I hurt Kurt and I was scared I might do it again. I was also afraid that they would lock me up in some crazy hospital. I couldn't take that,” Blaine said.

 

“But you locked yourself up in a mansion. Just because the walls were prettier doesn't make it less like a prison, albeit one of your own making. You're stronger than you think, Blaine.”

 

“What's to stop it from happening again?” Blaine asked.

 

“They are giving you new pills, plus there are other medications we can try. It was probably the meeting with your mother that triggered it all. You won't be forced into that again. You don't have to see her, but you know Cooper misses you. He feels like you've been taken away once again, Blaine, and I don't think it's fair to him. I know you thought you were doing the right thing, but you caused a lot of heartache with your actions,” Burt told him. Carole and Kurt had begged him to be easy on Blaine, but Burt had called Sophia and talked it over with her. She advised him to be straight forward with Blaine, not brutal, but honest. 

 

“I didn't think of that. I was only focused on what a danger I had become to Kurt, I was afraid of what could happen if someday Finn wasn't there to stop me, if Carole wasn't there to give me a sedative. I'm still afraid,” Blaine confessed, relieved that Burt was being real with him.

 

“I can't answer that. They did give you new medications and they will help with the PTSD. Kurt knows what can happen and he has chosen to stay with you, Blaine, he loves you but he's not wearing rose colored glasses. He was not being safe and he paid the price of that. But life has no guarantees, and I think Kurt is intelligent enough, not to mention courageous enough, to stand by you. Let him. I've seen first hand what happens when he loses you, Blaine, and a black eye isn't as bad as the pain I saw on his face when he thought he'd lost you,” Burt said.

 

Blaine just sat there, his head dropped to his chest, letting the hurt roll over him at the thought of what he had caused. Not just to Kurt and Cooper, but to everyone else from Burt and Carole to Puck and Santana. He didn't know how to proceed, it was too much.

 

“I'm going to go down to the bedroom and take a nap,” Blaine said.

 

“Blaine, if you're actually tired, then by all means do that. But, if you are running away from your feelings, afraid or ashamed or confused or whatever – don't. I'm going in to fix some lunch and then sit and watch a game, the football game is starting in a while. You can keep me company and that might be better than hiding in your room,” Burt said, looking at Blaine with those eyes that he used to tell Kurt when he messed up.

 

“I'll call Cooper, then I'll come help cook some lunch, if that's okay. I'll watch the game with you until Kurt gets home from class.” Blaine smiled at Burt, thankful this man was in his life and that he cared about him.

 

 

* * *

 

After dinner that evening, Blaine took Kurt's hand as they walked downstairs. He sat on the bed, not sure for a moment what to say, but when he laid his head on the pillow he smelled something that was not Kurt. It smelled like another person and he picked up the pillow to sniff at it a little more, cold shivers running down his spine as it registered to him that this was someone's scent...in Kurt's bed, and it wasn't him. It smelled a bit familiar, but he couldn't place it. Did he have the right to question Kurt when he'd been the one to run away? He sighed.

 

“What's wrong, Blaine?” Kurt asked, getting into bed in his signature silk pajamas.

 

Blaine took one more sniff and put the pillow down. He didn't say anything, just avoided eye contact. Kurt looked at the pillow with curiosity and picked it up, bringing it to his nose and taking a sniff. His eyes got wide for a moment and he set it down, taking Blaine into his arms.

 

“You noticed someone was here with me,” Kurt said, a statement rather than a question. Blaine looked back at Kurt, thinking he had no right to know who it was. He was the one that had left for two months, after all. He thought he could hear the crack in his heart as it broke.

 

“Blaine, there was somebody in my bed, someone I got comfort from when I thought I'd lost you. It was two fucking months, Blaine. I didn't want to live.” Kurt said in desperation. 

 

Blaine looked away. He didn't think he had any right to even ask who it was. 

 

“Blaine, look at me. I did not have a lover here. I only love you. But I was so lost without you, Santana stayed with me most of the nights you were gone. Brittany, too. They held me and cried with me and kept my hope alive. Some days Puck or Lauren came, even Finn stayed with me a few times. They thought I might harm myself, Blaine. I couldn't assure them I wouldn't, so they kept vigil,” Kurt whispered into Blaine's hair as he held him close to his chest. 

 

“I'm sorry, Kurt. If it makes any difference, I was just as lost. I was scared to come back even though I wanted to an hour after I left. I didn't want to hurt you again, Kurt. I'm still scared it might happen again, but I'm powerless to stay away. Just promise me you won't put yourself in danger again, okay? If I'm having a bad spell, then call someone, get out of the room. “Promise me?” Blaine begged.

 

“Okay, baby. I will. We'll get through this together.”

 

“Okay.”

 

 

Blaine got ready for bed, wanting to get into the smaller bed in the corner to keep Kurt safer, but his heart wouldn't let him. He looked at Kurt's eyes, liquid blue pools of some dark shade and he just had to cuddle close to him. They hadn't been allowed to in the hospital due to Blaine having pneumonia, so this would be the first time in months for them to begin to mend.

 

“C'mere,” Kurt invited and Blaine crawled under the blankets, pasting himself to Kurt. He wasn't sure if it was okay to take off Kurt's pajamas, to take off his own and get even closer – sharing the warm skin and hot kisses they had shared so many times before. Kurt was of the same mind as they laid together, barely touching, afraid to even breathe hard. They fell asleep just touching fingertips, each with the other's name on their lips.

 

 

Several hours of sleep later, it was only nine in the evening. Kurt woke a little, reaching out for Santana. He tried to drag her back to snuggle into his chest, but she resisted. He thought of and dismissed the idea quickly as he stroked her face to waken her completely. It was probably for the best, while she was a good friend and kept him sane most days, any thing that made Blaine less real was a bad thing in Kurt's and Santana's world. They would cuddle or just be there in the same space, both missing Blaine, and it was okay for her to stroke his back. However, there was a line drawn and neither of them ever thought of crossing it. But, wait...this wasn't Santana. Kurt opened his eyes and realized this was Blaine. Oh, yes, Blaine was back, his Blaine. Back in his arms. So he snuggled closer, kissing Blaine's neck, down to his collarbone and back, reveling in the touch, the scent, the feel of having Blaine back. Kurt felt like he had died and gone to heaven because his Blaine, his baby, was back in his arms. He wanted to shout, to scream, to sing, but instead he just kissed Blaine's neck and face until he saw those golden hazel eyes open and the recognition spread to the rest of Blaine's body, bringing him into focus as never before.

 

 

“Kurt.....” Blaine whispered softly, knowing he was truly in heaven now because he never needed anything but Kurt to make each moment the best it could be. He began to unbutton Kurt's pajama shirt, doing it for the first time without permission, but thinking this time it might be okay. It didn't take more than a few minutes and both of them were naked and struggling to occupy the same space in time. “Kurt, I...I need you, Kurt. I have to have you, right now...please, Kurt, please,” Blaine was outright begging. 

 

“Yes, Blaine, I'm here, I need you just as much. I do. I thought I'd lost you and here you are...I love you, Blaine. Don't ever scare me like that again. Please don't leave me again, baby...” Kurt stopped begging long enough to kiss Blaine once more before he touched him, and Blaine touched Kurt, and they fell together, rolling under the covers and kissing, holding, yearning for each other. It was lightning and heat and touching and grinding, both so desperate to prove their love to the other. Blaine reached for the lube, trembling with his need to take Kurt, but there was no tube of lubricant in the bedside table. He turned on the small lamp to see if he'd missed it in the drawer. He looked over at Kurt, who dug into the drawer to bring out what looked like a tub of margarine. Blaine stared at it.

 

“Ah, Kurt...not to kill the mood or anything, but why do you have a tub of margarine in your bedside drawer? Were you...short of cash?” Blaine asked.

 

“No. It isn't margarine. Look at the label,” Kurt said, smirking. Blaine looked at Kurt, a tiny bit upset at having their intimate moment basically ruined. He looked at the label and a smile started across his face. There on the yellow and blue label was the drawing of a muscle-bound arm churning butter. Blaine's eyes got wide.

 

“Where in hell did you get this?” he asked, trying not to laugh. 

 

“You can get anything on line, Blaine. Anything. And it comes to your house in a plain brown wrapper,” Kurt smiled.

 

“Kurt. This is....'Boy Butter'? Oh, my goodness. Really? 'Boy Butter'??” Blaine was now laughing so hard he'd lost his erection, well, a little anyway. 

 

“Hey, I researched this! It was a surprise for you and I had been waiting for the right time. Don't laugh, it is supposed to be great stuff...part silicone, part coconut oil, homogenized to make it smoother...and it also comes in “Fresca” which is cool and tingly and in a warming formula. We can try those if we get adventurous one day....” Kurt was a wealth of information when he was embarrassed. He would have kept talking, but Blaine shut out the light and dragged him under the sheets, tub of Boy Butter in tow.

 

It only took a moment before Blaine had Kurt spread out in front of him, a scoop of Boy Butter in his fingers, rubbing it to get it warm before applying it to Kurt's most intimate places. A guttural moan escaped Kurt's lips and Blaine barely touched him, smoothing the slick substance around the tight muscle and started gently rubbing and swirling his fingers. They had used various lubricants before, but they had been drugstore purchases and while they were adequate, the difference between K-Y jelly and Boy Butter was an ocean apart. Blaine's fingers slid through the lube, caressing and teasing before he applied a bit more and his finger found it's way inside to move in a dancing rhythm in and out, causing Kurt to groan and stutter, taken away by the new possibilities. 

 

Blaine was no longer in a hurry. He was intent on making this last, bringing Kurt to the edge and back time after time before he would give in to thrusting himself inside. He used a little more, this time on his other hand as he slicked it up Kurt's cock. Oh, the slide this produced had Kurt hard as a brass rod, babbling nonsense as Blaine stroked him and pumped him at the same time. 

 

“Stop, baby...please stop,” Kurt finally said, reaching out to hold Blaine's hands still. One breath across his skin and he knew it would be all over, so he sat very still, holding Blaine's hands tightly while he calmed his breathing...

 

After a few moments, Kurt leaned forward, very softly placing his lips on Blaine's. They stayed that way, just exchanging gentle, tender kisses for what seemed like eternity and finally lay back in each other's arms. Kurt moved first, still very aware that the wrong move would send him onto orbit. He dug a bit of the Boy Butter out of the tub, spreading it on his fingers and reaching between Blaine's legs to stroke it across his entrance. Blaine moaned a bit, feeling what Kurt had been feeling and wondering how it could feel so different than what they normally used. Kurt knew how if felt, so he continued with the rhythmic application, adding some to his other hand in the way Blaine had, sharing the excitement and watching Blaine's face as he fell apart. Blaine turned Kurt over, kissing down his spine and reaching forward to take his boyfriend's cock in his hand as he entered and felt the slick lube as he pushed forward with no resistance, the smoothness making every tiny feeling a magnification of anything he had felt before. He was beyond calculated thought now, depending on muscle memory and instinct to guide him as he made love to Kurt, sliding and pushing, thrusting and moaning until the insistent rubbing of his cock on Kurt's prostate sparked the end and they came, thinking of fireworks and TNT and atomic bombs for an amazing moment, then of how it felt to be so close, to feel the other as if they were inside each other, experiencing this as if they had traded places somehow. 

 

They shuffled and squirmed until they were comfortable, rolled around each other, amber connecting to ocean as they gazed deep in each others' eyes and knowing this was it, this was what they wanted. Kurt's arms tightened, holding Blaine so there was no space between them, chest to chest so that they could feel the heartbeat of the other through their skin. 

 

“Kurt, I don't ever want to be apart again. Don't let me be so stupid, I'm so sorry. I'm so fucking sorry I worried you, that I made you doubt me – that you thought I doubted you. Help me be who I want to be, the person that deserves you. Please, Kurt,” Blaine whispered.

 

“Only if you help me to be the same, baby. I want to be right for you, I want to understand you and be there for you even when the nightmares come. I want to save you, Blaine, so you can save me. I want to be together for the rest of our lives,” Kurt whispered back. 

 

They fell asleep, not aware of the other people in the house, who were all a bit embarrassed because they had heard the two boys making love, shouting each others' names and moaning so loudly it was no secret what they were doing. 

 

Even Burt, who was probably the most embarrassed by the lustful noises assaulting the ears of everyone, just turned up the volume on the television and didn't say a word. 


	12. Shaken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always wondered what happened to Brittany...she went from being a typical student to being some sort of ...ah...idiot. How could she have gotten to be a senior in high school if she was so damaged? She lives in her own world, and so I thought up a reason for her to be the way she is.

 

“We're gonna be late if you don't hurry!” Santana urged Brittany, rushing down the hall to the choir room. Coach Sylvester had held them late once again, probably because she knew Scheuster was on the warpath about everyone being tardy so often. Brittany was sauntering down the hall, brushing her hand against the lockers and saying a counting rhyme to herself as she walked. 

 

“Britt! Now! Maybe you don't care, but I do. If I get in trouble with Mr Schue, he might not write the letter of recommendation I need for college, so even if you don't hurry for your own sake, can you do it for me?” Santana snapped at her girlfriend, losing her temper again, then feeling bad for it. 

 

Brittany stopped and looked at Santana. She saw no reason to hurry, it wasn't as if anyone cared if she was there in Glee or not, but she decided to do it for Santana. Hitching her book bag a little further up on her shoulder, she took a few quick steps and her toe caught on her shoelaces....and she went flying down the hallway, skidding head first into a wall. Santana was there in an instant, shouting to her girlfriend......but Brittany was out cold.

 

 

Blaine was hurrying from another direction. He had stopped at his locker to get some sheet music and came around the corner at a quick pace, stopping in his tracks as he saw Brittany stumble and go skidding. He was there almost as fast as Santana and held her back with firm gentle hands.

 

“Wait, sweetheart. We need to see if her neck is hurt before you move her, okay?” Blaine asked softly. Santana melted into Blaine's arms a little while Blaine dialed the emergency number on his cell phone. The halls were empty because it was after school and all the students who were still there were in extracurricular activities. Kurt and Puck rounded the corner, missing Blaine in Glee and coming to look for him.

 

“Oh, no...what's happened?” Puck asked as Kurt landed on his knees beside Santana and Blaine.

 

“Sssshhheee...” Santana began, then took a deep breath. “We were running for class and she slipped. When she fell, she skidded against the wall and she's been unconscious ever since,” she finally got out, then looked around for Puck, who had vanished.

 

A second later, Puck was running back, Sue Sylvester in tow. She was the first person he encountered and instead of explaining, he just grabbed her wrist, pulling her along until she saw someone on the floor. Shannon Beiste was right behind, having seen Puck grab Sue's wrist and drag her out of the gym.

 

“I called an ambulance,” Blaine said as Sue knelt beside Brittany, tenderly moving her fingers under Britt's chin to find her pulse.

 

“I can feel her pulse and it's very strong. Did she hit her head when she fell or when she went into the wall? How fast was she going when she hit the wall?” Sue kept asking, her hand patting Britt very gently on the back. “Come here and talk to her, Santana. She'll rest easier if she can hear your voice,” the coach advised. The students looked at Sue, she was showing a side that nobody had ever seen of her before, with the exception of Kurt, and they were surprised. Santana was holding Britt's hand in hers, begging her to wake up when the EMT's came down the hall.

 

They put Brittany on a backboard after applying a neck brace, strapping her down tightly, and let Santana and Coach Sylvester ride in the ambulance. By this time, a crowd had gathered and several teachers were there, asking the students to go home, they would get more information in the morning.

 

Kurt drove Blaine and Puck to the hospital where they waited, eventually seeing Brittany's parents enter the corridor. Kurt went up to them, “Dr. Pierce, Brittany is in the room right ahead on your left. Santana and Coach Sylvester are with her. I'm here if you and Mrs Pierce need anything.”

 

“Thank you, Kurt. It was so kind of you to come and wait for Britt. I'll be back in a few minutes to let you know what we can find out.” The optometrist smiled at Kurt, knowing him from a few times when Kurt brought some needy children to his office...Sam's brother and Blaine among them. 

 

 

An hour later, Santana came out to the waiting room, Dr. Pierce at her side. They explained that when Britt fell, she hit the top of her head on the brick wall and it compressed a vertebrae in her neck. It wasn't bulging or herniated or anything and rest should fix it in about four to six weeks. In the mean time, Britt would have to wear a neck brace and rest a lot. The friends could go in and see her for a few minutes before she went to sleep and she would probably be released in the morning.

 

“Brittany, honey, how do you feel?” Kurt asked, taking her hand in his as she lay pale and shaky on the bed.

 

“I'm okay, but I feel funny. My toes and legs are all tingly, but the doctor said I would be okay, it would feel funny for a while,” she smiled at Kurt, squeezing his hand. “I could hear you talking to Santana, but I couldn't talk, I don't know why..?”

 

“You were kind of stunned, then you passed out I think,” Blaine told her. We're glad you're okay, honey.”

 

Brittany looked at Blaine, taking in the stress that was very evident across his face. 

 

“I think you need to rest, too, Blaine Warbler. You need to let Kurt hold you close the way Santana holds me. It always makes everything better.” She smiled at Blaine, then turned to Puck. 

 

“Thank you for getting Coach Sylvester, Puck. She told me you came and dragged her down the hall to me. I think she said she was going to sue you for touching her. Better hide from her, Noah, she means business. But I like her, too.”

 

“You're right, Britt, she is a good person to know, but I'll watch out, okay?” Puck asked for agreement.

 

“Okay, guys, goodnight,” Britt finished, closing her eyes for a minute. They took this to mean it was time to go, so everyone left – except Santana and Brittany's parents.

 

 

* * *

 

“Poor Brittany. I don't know how that could happen...just a fluke accident. You never know when something like that's gonna happen. Makes you want to cherish the people you love even more, every day, doesn't it?” Puck said, looking at his friends as they gazed at him in astonishment. This was just not something they were used to hearing from Puck's mouth. 

 

“You're right, I hadn't thought of that. Makes me want to go home and hug my parents,” Lauren said, rubbing Puck's back in a comforting gesture. 

 

They were all sitting in Grandma Sofia's dining room: Puck and Lauren, Blaine and Kurt, and Santana. Brittany was home, but resting and Santana needed a few minutes to herself since she had been with Brittany for two days now. 

 

“Your friend, she is doing okay now?” Sophia asked Santana.

 

“Yes, she has a bruise on the top of her head and she had a bad headache for several days, but she is getting better all the time. The doctors say all she needs is rest. Thank you, Grandma Sofia,” Santana took the old woman's hand and squeezed it gently. The old woman smiled at her. She knew that Santana appeared to be very gruff and mean, but actually had a heart of gold, and Sophia knew the kind of life a young child endured to develop such a shell. 

 

On Sophia's other side, Blaine was sitting, holding her other hand and smiling. He was very attached to the woman, to say the least, and had bared his soul to her several times. She held some of his deepest secrets, knew some dark things about him and where his mind went during one of his PTSD spells, but she kept those secrets and never flinched when he told her the bad things. She just held on to him, accepted him unconditionally, and that was something not everyone had in this life. He was grateful.

 

“Kurt, Lauren, you come help me in the kitchen, right?” Sophia asked, getting up from her chair and finding Kurt's hand gently supporting her. She smiled at him, thinking how much he resembled his father. Burt was just such a boy and had grown into a shining example of a man.

 

They walked into the kitchen and Sophia gave each of them dishes to set on the table, spoons, forks, glasses, napkins, and all the things for a nice dinner. Then she had Kurt help her getting out the beef roast with mushroom onion gravy and some dinner rolls. Taking the meat from the pan, Sophia added a cup of water to the drippings in the bottom of the pan, then handed the fork to Lauren to stir the flour into a cup of water, making a paste before adding it to the drippings. Sophia sat down in a chair she kept there, but got up when she needed to.  


 

Kurt put the potatoes in the mixing bowl, adding cream and salt before mashing them. They smelled heavenly. 

 

“How did you make these?” Kurt asked, curious about the scent.

 

“I peeled, chopped, and cooked a celery root until it was soft, then added it to the potatoes along with a bit of onion juice and a clove of garlic. It's the celery root that gives it the fresh smell. Here, taste," she said and then held up a spoon with a bit of the mash on it. Kurt obligingly took the bite and was amazed. 

 

“Oh, Grandma Sophia, this is wonderful, so delicious,” Kurt enthused, enjoying the bright smile that reached Sophia's eyes at the kind words. All the food was set on the table and the young people began to fill their plates: green beans with almonds, candied carrots with butter, sliced fresh tomatoes from Lauren's garden. They all chatted with each other as they praised Sophia's cooking.

This is what Sophia lived for now: making people happy. She had enough heartache in her life and just wanted her last few years to be full of hope for this new generation of children to grow into happy, healthy, worthwhile adults. She thought they had a good start with the ones sitting right here at her table. 

 

 

It was only a week later and Brittany was back at school, doing fine as long as she took it easy. She had to take a leave of absence with the Cheerios and sit out of Glee, but it didn't seem to bother her too much. Santana or one of her friends was there for her and she would sit, arms around one or another of them, and cheer for the choir as they got ready for their next competition. 

 

One day as Britt entered the choir room, she noticed Santana wasn't there. Kurt saw that she looked a little lost and nudged Blaine, nodding at Britt. He called her name, placing a chair between them as Blaine reached out a hand to direct Britt into the chair. By the time class started, Brittany was leaning on Blaine, his arm supporting her and Kurt's hand was holding hers in her lap. Santana had sent Kurt a text asking him to look out for Brittany because she had an appointment that day.

 

 

* * *

 

Santana stepped into Dr. Pierce's office. She had been here several times, had even had her eyes checked here. That was the first time she had met Brittany, when they were about seven. One of Santana's teachers had sent her name in as a child that might need glasses and couldn't afford it. Dr. Pierce had worked with the Lion's Club in getting glasses for underprivileged kids and was glad to help this young girl, who was the same age as his own little princess. As it turned out, Santana didn't require glasses, but she had been a little frightened of what they were going to do in the exam room and Dr. Pierce had called Brittany in to hold her hand and show her there was nothing to be afraid of. They had been best friends ever since.

 

“It's nice to see you, 'Tana,” Dr. Pierce greeted her. “You know Sophia Suder, don't you?” he asked, gesturing to the woman sitting on a soft chair beside Brittany's mother. 

 

“Yes, hello, Grandma,” Santana said, more curious.

 

“Santana, we don't have good news, and we wanted to talk to you about it. We're waiting for one more person,” he said, as a knock was heard at the door and Mrs. Lopez came in.

 

“Mama?” Tana said, as chills ran up her arms and down her back. 

 

Tana's mother sat down next to her, placing an arm around her daughter. Santana looked at the people sitting in the office and knew something very bad had happened.

 

Dr. Pierce sat across from Tana and took her hand in his.

 

“Do you remember when Brittany fell a few weeks ago and hit her head? Well, in being careful in his diagnosis, Dr. Ewing took some CatScans of her head to make sure there were no broken or cracked vertebrae. There wasn't any damage caused by the fall, just some bruising and she will be fine as far as that aspect is concerned.” He took a deep breath, looking into Santana's liquid brown eyes, seeing the tears gather. He could see that she knew it was bad news, so he hurried to tell her, knowing from years of being a doctor that knowing what you're up against is better than not knowing and having your imagination fill in the blanks.

 

“She has a tumor. In her brain,” he said, and jumped as Tana's hand squeezed tightly in shock and hurt his hand. She didn't say anything, just looked into his eyes, begging him to tell her it was going to be okay, that it was benign, it was a mistake, it wasn't happening. 

 

“I have to go,” she said, getting up to leave, to run...but her mother stopped her, arms suddenly in a vise-like grip around her daughter.

 

“No. Stay and listen. Brittany will need you, my baby, and you must stay and learn how to help her,” Mrs. Lopez said.

 

“You're right, Mama,” she said and looked at Dr. Pierce expectantly. It was Sophia that answered, however.

 

“Santana, the reason we are all here is because we love you. We know you and Brittany have something special between you, and we acknowledge that. I know it has been hard for you, coming out when it wasn't your choice, having the McKinley bullies turn on you when you were at your weakest point, when you could have denied it, shoved the truth into a box and lived as though it had never happened, you stood by Brittany because you knew she needed you.

 

“Time and again, you have shown us, all of us, that you are a strong person that will not let injustice stand. When Blaine was rescued from his imprisonment, you stood by him, you put yourself in danger to rescue someone that needed your strength. Now, once again, we are asking you to be strong. Brittany doesn't know what is wrong with her. She will need you more than anyone else has ever needed you, Santana, and we are asking you if you can do this. Can you stand by her in the hardest thing she has ever had to face?” Sophia asked. 

 

“I think you have known for a long time that there is something 'special' about Britt,” Mrs. Pierce began. “You might have wondered about us, why we didn't do anything when we saw her grades slipping, why we didn't seem to notice that she was making less and less sense. Why she would say such strange things...like accusing her cat of stealing her schoolbooks or believing Rory was a leprechaun. Well at first, we thought it was just her joking. She has always been a touch naïve – still believing in Santa, or the Easter bunny. But it continued. We took her to a doctor to see if there was something we could do...and she has been on some medication, but it wasn't working.”

 

“Last week, she told me that dolphins were just gay sharks. We all laughed, but it upset me. I love her, and I saw there was something terribly wrong. I'm so sorry I didn't say anything. I didn't want to believe it,” Santana dropped her head, ashamed of herself.

 

“Don't blame yourself, we all noticed and it took this accident to make us take action,” Dr. Pierce said.

 

“We know the tumor is in a good place – if there is such a thing. We don't know if it is cancerous, but we need to have a biopsy done. It will be frightening for her, they'll have to shave her head and drill into her skull. She will need you, Tana,” Britt's father continued.

 

“I'll be there. Can I tell Blaine, Kurt, and Puck? We have a bond after the whole ordeal Blaine went through, and I know they will be there for her,” Santana begged. She was willing to do anything for Brittany, but having her support in place would help her and Britt through it. 

 

“Yes. Let us tell Brittany first, tonight. We want you to be there when we tell her, if you can,” Mrs. Pierce asked.

 

“Of course, I'll be there...” Santana said, then buried her head in her mother's shoulder and held on as her mother stroked her back. 

 

* * *

 

 

“Blaine?”

 

“Ah...Tana? Is that you? What's wrong?” Blaine asked.

 

“What makes you think anything is wrong?” Santana said in her bitter tone, overcompensating as she realized how vulnerable she sounded.

 

“Because you always call me 'Prince in the Tower' or 'Kurt's Prancing Pony', or 'Hobbit'. If you're calling me by my name, I know something is not right. Now spill.”

 

“Can I meet with you and Kurt for breakfast tomorrow? I know it's Saturday, but I need to speak with you,” she said.

 

“Where and when? You know we'll be there,” Blaine answered, getting a bit worried when Tana didn't elaborate further.

 

“Puck's house, 8 a.m. See you there.”

 

 

* * *

 

Santana came into the Pierce's house as soon as Mrs. Pierce opened the door. She went into the living room and sat on the sofa, Brittany's parents sitting across from her. Brittany skipped down the stairs, a big smile spreading across her face when she saw Tana waiting for her. She grinned and sat on Tana's lap, smiling at her parents.

 

“Brittany, I came today to talk to you about something. It isn't a happy thing, but I am going to be with you the whole time, okay?”

 

And they told Brittany about the possibility of what could happen, why they had to do the biopsy, and all the details. Britt took it pretty well, considering, and Santana kept her composure. The surgery was scheduled for Monday morning and Tana had been excused from school to be there.

 

* * *

 

“Come in, Kurt, Blaine,” Sophia said when she answered the door. She waved her arm towards the dining room and Kurt recognized that Sophia was most comfortable with the crisis of life if she faced them over a table loaded with comfort food. Kurt often felt the same way and recognized a kindred spirit when he found one.

 

“Hey, guys,” Puck said, gathering first Blaine then Kurt into his arms for a bear hug. They didn't know the reason Tana asked them to come, but they all felt the veil of fear in her voice when she called them last night. One look at Sophia and Kurt realized she knew already and he nodded at her when no one was looking. She nodded back, a sad look on her face. 

 

Santana rang the bell and Puck went to get her, coming back into the dining room with his arm around her. It looked like he was physically holding her up.

 

She sat down between Blaine and Puck, her head low and tears dried on her cheeks. 

 

“I'll get right to the point. I need you. When Brittany fell, they did a c-scan to see if she broke something. She didn't. But they found a tumor in her brain. Monday they are doing surgery to see if it is cancerous. They'll shave her head and drill a hole in her skull to access her brain. They will do the biopsy and look at it, then if it is something they can operate on, they will probably do it right then. I can be with her when they take her in and when she wakes up, but I need you to be with me for the hours while they operate.” 

She sat still, having told them everything they needed to know, and now she felt stiff and cold. Blaine started to put his arms around her, Kurt reached over to put his hand on her, but Puck picked her up and pulled her into his lap, surrounding her with his strong arms and she buried herself into him, only now crying and sobbing. 

 

“We'll be there, baby, we'll take care of you...” Blaine crooned, using the words Kurt always said to him, knowing how much they helped. 

 

Sophia came in from the kitchen, a small glass in her hand.

 

“Santana, honey, take this,” she directed, placing Tana's fingers around the glass. She drank it in one shot, gasping a bit and looking up at Sophia in thanks. Puck could smell the burned odor of the whiskey. 

 

They stayed with Santana, Kurt finally calling her mother to ask if she could stay with them that night, and Mrs. Lopez agreed, hoping her daughter would get the love and support she needed. It hurt her that Tana's friends were of more comfort than she was, but she recognized that a girl in her teens, with all the social pressure that Santana was under, naturally went to her friends. She knew Kurt and Blaine and liked them, she even liked Puck once she had gotten to know him, and prayed Tana would find the strength to be there for Brittany.

 

 

An hour later, all four of them were lying on Puck's bed. There wasn't much room in spite of it being a king sized bed, but they lay like so many puppies, all intertwined as they talked about Brittany and all their memories of her over the years. 

 

“Oh, my god. This sounds like a wake! She isn't dead yet!” Santana yelled, and they all realized that it was beginning to sound like that. It was very late and they fell asleep, all tangled together. Blaine and Puck fell asleep first, and Kurt moved next to Santana and took her in his arms, the way she had done for him when he was grieving over Blaine being lost to him.

 

“I know I can't guarantee anything, but I do believe she will be okay. I am usually the pessimistic one, always looking for the worst thing that will happen, but I don't feel that way this time. You helped me keep my sanity when Blaine was gone, Tana, and I owe you. You know I will be there every step of the way. We have each other's back, Tana. And I love you, sweetheart.” Kurt kissed her cheek as she wept and sighed into his chest. She hadn't noticed it, but Kurt had changed over the past year, he'd built muscles and he felt so strong holding her. She snuggled deep into him and whispered, “I love you, too.”

 

 

Kurt smoothed her hair from her eyes and began to sing very softly, so as not to wake the others:

 

 

 

_Oh, why you look so sad?_

 

_Tears are in your eyes_

 

_Come on and come to me now_

 

_Don't be ashamed to cry_

 

_Let me see you through_

 

_'Cause I've seen the dark side, too._

 

 

_When the night falls on you_

 

_You don't know what to do_

 

_Nothin' you confess, could make me love you less_

 

 

Puck woke up and began to sing with Kurt, then Blaine joined in, too:

 

 

_I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you_

 

_Won't let nobody hurt you_

 

_I'll stand by you_

 

 

_So, if you're mad, get mad_

 

_Don't hold it all inside_

 

_Come on and talk to me know_

 

 

_Hey, what you got to hide?_

 

_I get angry, too_

 

_Well, I'm a lot like you_

 

 

_When you're standing a the crossroads_

 

_And don't know which path to choose_

 

_Let me come along_

 

_'Cause even if you're wrong_

 

 

_I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you_

 

_Won't let nobody hurt you_

 

_I'll stand by you_

 

 

_And when the night falls on you, baby_

 

_You feelin' all alone_

 

_You won't be all alone_

 

_You won'_

 

_t be on your own_

 

 

_I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you_

 

_Won't let nobody hurt you_

 

_I'll stand by you_

 

_Take me in, into your darkest hour_

 

_And I'll never desert you_

 

 

_I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you...._

 

 

 

 

“I love you guys...” Santana said, amazed that they all loved her so much, that she had the capacity to love them all, and she no longer felt alone in this.

 

 

* * *

 

“Do you think she'll be okay?” Blaine asked Kurt the next day as they walked through the park, hand in hand because they were alone in the trees and nobody was near. 

 

“I do. Of course, I could be wrong...I felt like my mom would live forever and I was wrong then, but this doesn't seem like the same thing at all. I hope you were okay with me holding Tana that night,” Kurt asked, a little afraid of the answer. He had seen the way Blaine looked when he saw Santana in Kurt's arms.

 

“Yeah, I did feel funny about it, you know, but I also know there was no reason to be jealous. I trust you with everything, Kurt, and I know you would never cheat. It wasn't anything sexual, it was more like I was unhappy that someone could be made to feel better by your hands. I'm not sad you did it, I'd have done the same thing if I could have given her some respite, but it wouldn't have been the same thing.”

 

“I understand. I have to tell you something, though, baby. You won't like it, but it happened and I don't want you to ever doubt me, so I want you to know.” Kurt said. Blaine shrunk within himself, knowing whatever it was, that he would rather not know, but the not knowing might hurt more than the knowing. He sighed and nodded his head at Kurt.

 

“When you left, when I couldn't find you...Santana came over. I was devastated, wasn't eating or sleeping, and my dad took me to a doctor because I had lost so much weight. I just didn't care anymore.” 

 

Kurt hesitated. He certainly didn't want to cause Blaine any more pain or chase him away again, but somewhere inside he also needed to tell Blaine that what he did was devastating. “Well, Santana found out and she came over. I hadn't even bathed myself in weeks. She shaved me, then stripped me down and started a shower......I guess she really didn't trust that I could cope with something as basic as a shower because the nest thing I knew....she had...she had taken off her clothes as well and stepped into the shower and washed me from nose to toes.”

 

Blaine just stared at Kurt and Kurt wondered if it was the realization that he could not function without Blaine, or if the shock of his boyfriend naked in a shower with an equally naked girl stirred up some sort of jealousy. He wasn't going to ask, so he continued.

 

“She put clean linen on the bed and made me lie down. She held me all night, Blaine, and I think she saved my life. I didn't care anymore because I thought you were gone, but she made me take care of myself, she made me realize I had to keep living because you would come back. I owe her, Blaine. And I might never be able to repay her, but I can try.” Kurt finished, tears in his eyes as he brushed them out. Blaine stopped, looked at Kurt and held out his arms.

 

“Well, then, thank god for her, baby. I will never leave you, but thank God Tana was there and saved you for me,” Blaine said, taking Kurt by the neck and bringing his face close to kiss him. 

 

“They all did...Puck, Lauren,.......Brittany even came one night. They stayed with me every night until you came home, baby.”

 

Blaine closed his eyes, his reaction to Kurt's explanation caused so many emotions to stir around in his brain. He tried to feel out if he was jealous – that all these people were so ready to help Kurt out, that Santana had basically taken over his devotion to Kurt's welfare for the time he was gone. Blaine sat with his eyes closed, holding Kurt tightly as he thought it over. He might even be a tinge jealous that he had spent so many agonizing hours all alone while Kurt had support every minute - but he knew that was something he had brought on himself, not something Kurt instigated and it would never have happened if he had stayed home with Kurt where he belonged. He found himself melting into Kurt's embrace and uttered the words that were the most true: “Then thank God for them.”


	13. The Verdict and the Center

Everyone was gathered in the hospital waiting room. It might be good news because instead of it being just 45 minutes, which would have meant that the tumor was inoperable, it was five hours. 

 

In spite of her prickly nature, Santana was docile and weepy the whole time. She just sort of pasted herself to Kurt, soaking up all of his kind and loving care. Nobody dared say a thing, worried that if they angered the girl she would explode like a vengeful storm and sweep them all off the face of the earth. 

 

“Tana...” Puck said, brushing the hair out of her eyes and wiping her face with a cool damp cloth he got from a nurse. She didn't say anything in return, but her eyes focused on Puck and he knew she was acknowledging him in the only way she knew. After looking at Kurt for a moment and getting a nod, he gathered Santana in his arms and let her rest against his side, cuddling close to absorb his warmth. Lauren sat down on her other side, taking her hand and holding it in support. Finn came next, his mother producing a blanket just out of the warmer for Finn to tuck around her. 

 

In the sofa across the small room were Dr. and Mrs. Pierce, embracing and waiting. Blaine sat next to Mrs. Pierce, holding her hand. She would occasionally look over at Santana, trying to smile encouragement to her daughter's girlfriend. They loved Santana, although Santana had trouble believing that. But the Pierce's were quiet people, faithful and willing to wait for Tana to see the truth: that anyone their daughter loved so much was a part of their hearts, too.

 

A doctor in blue-green scrubs walked into the room, his face tired but a smile on his lips.

 

He looked at Dr. Pierce, silently asking if they wanted to speak alone, but Dr. Pierce shook his head and waved his hand across the room.

 

“They're her friends, they can hear it. They have been with us through all of the waiting, so just tell us,” he urged.

 

“We did find a tumor. We were able to remove it in it's entirety and we sent a biopsy to the lab. They analyzed it during the surgery and it did not carry any cancer cells. It was totally benign, but was pressing on certain places in Brittany's brain that caused the problems she was experiencing. 

 

“That said, she is going to take some time to recover. We are going to be very cautious because any time you operate on the brain, it can cause some damage. We don't know at this point if the damage caused by the tumor is permanent. Only time will tell. Brittany will need all of her family and friends now, to help her get through the recovery period. But I can feel the love in this room and I know you will be the best medicine she could have.

 

“Now, if you want to go and sit with your daughter, Dr. and Mrs. Pierce, you may,” he told them.

 

Santana's eyes searched out Mrs. Pierce with a begging look. 

 

“Brittany's girlfriend needs to be there, too,” Mrs Pierce told the doctor, and he nodded.

 

“It isn't our usual policy, but I see this would be the best for Brittany. Of course you are welcome, Miss....”

 

“Lopez. Santana Lopez,” Dr Pierce provided.

 

“Miss Lopez, please come with me, and we will take you to Brittany,” he smiled at her as she got up, folding the blanket and thanking her friends.

 

 

* * *

 

“Britt? Baby?” Santana cooed, stroking her girlfriend's cheek. She was frightened, seeing Brittany covered with bandages and seeing her entire head was shaved. Under the edge of the white wrapping, Britt's skin was bruised and splotches of iodine were spattered across her cheeks. Her eyes fluttered, trying in vain to focus, but finally slipped shut with a sigh of resignation of her body's refusal to cooperate. She lifted a hand, but not too far because the IV tubes confused her.

 

“Tana? Come here...” Brittany's voice was soft and needy.

 

“I'm here, baby. Your mom and dad are here, too,” Santana told her, coming close and brushing her cheek again.

 

“Daddy? Am I okay? Did they find the cancer?” Brittany asked anxiously. “Mommy? Will I stop being stupid now?”

 

“We're here, honey. No, they didn't find any cancer at all. They took out the tumor and you're going to be all better. We're all here to help, but for now, just rest,” Mrs Pierce told her daughter. Brittany relaxed, holding her mother's hand for a minute. 

 

“Britt, honey, you know you were never stupid, don't you?” Dr. Pierce told her, stroking his fingers across her forehead the was he had done when she was a child. She hummed a quizzical response, looking up at her dad with love in her eyes. 

 

“We had been concerned about some of the things that seemed to be happening to you, but nobody thought you were stupid. Brittany, we have always been so proud of you. You have the most tender heart of anyone I've ever known, you care so much about those you love, how can that be stupid?” her father asked. 

 

“We can talk all about this when you're rested and feeling better, Britt, but remember we all think you are sensational. Now, close your eyes and we'll be back in an hour or two to check on you. Santana is staying with you for a little while, okay?” Mrs. Pierce said.

 

“Okay, I'm sleepy. Kiss me, Tana,” Brittany said, dozing off to sleep again. Santana kissed her temple and stroked her cheek.

 

“Goodnight, baby. I'll be here when you wake up.”

 

Dr. Pierce put an arm around Mrs. Pierce and Santana, smiling because his daughter was going to be okay. 

 

* * *

 

“They've given her a sedative for now, so she will be asleep for several hours. Why don't you all go home, take a shower, eat some dinner before you come back to visit. She will be in ICU overnight, so she can't have any visitors other than family for a while,” the nurse told them. 

 

“Why don't we take you to dinner and then home for a while, Tana,” Blaine asked, his hand on her shoulder.

 

“I hope you plan on feeding me a feast, Prince of the Tower, because I'm ravenous. C'mon Pretty Pony, let's get going,” Tana barked, looking at Blaine and Kurt with a smile. Everyone brightened up at her insults, so happy that their friend was back. Nice Santana was scaring them, but if she was back to snarking and biting, they knew it would all be okay.

 

* * *

 

 

Brittany was recovering nicely. She still had a long way to go, but she seemed better in many ways. They all sort of missed her quirky observations...but were so relieved that there was no longer a tumor pressing on her brain that triggered some of the outrageous things she said: she no longer thought a ballad was a male duck, that dolphins were just gay sharks or that her cat was reading her diary. At first they kind of missed the funny things, but now that her friends knew it was caused from a brain tumor, it wasn't funny anymore.

 

All of her close friends took it in turns to spend the days with her. Puck and Lauren came and Puck brought his guitar to sing, which pleased Britt. Kurt and Blaine came, as did most of the New Directions, including Mr. Schue and Coach Sylvester. The Cheerios all came and did a routine out on the front lawn where Brittany could see it from her window, and her bright smile warmed everyone's heart. 

 

Every day Santana came to sit with her girlfriend, offering support and kisses. The worst part was that there was no place for Brittany to recover in Lima. She would have to go to Columbus or Dayton to stay instead of having a place her parents could drive her to during the day so she could stay at home at night. Having to stay in a strange city by herself most of the time in the rehab hospital was depressing for Britt's family and friends, and frightening for her. She had told Kurt and Blaine about it one day, and Blaine came home to talk it over with Kurt.

 

 

* * *

 

 

It hadn't been very long since Kurt had Blaine back, but they still hadn't talked about it. Kurt was getting anxious, he knew from experience that letting something like that build up was not the way to go about it. He had started to say something several times, but it just wasn't the right time. He was determined to bring it up soon when Brittany had the accident and subsequent findings. Their little universe had been rocked by all of this and everyone had rushed to comfort Santana and Brittany, which was as it should be, but Kurt felt that his relationship with Blaine had been left on the back burner and it was beginning to make him worry.

 

After the whole meeting Sasha fiasco, then Blaine's awful nightmare that had turned violent and his running...then nothing. Kurt was concerned about Blaine's relationship with Cooper. They had been up and down so many times, and this was a bad thing now. They spoke, Cooper had made time to stay with Blaine and take him out, just the two of them, but it wasn't right. Kurt sighed. Blaine was out with him right now, eating at Breadstix. 

 

 

“Dad?” Kurt called as he walked up the stairs. Carole was at class and Finn was over at Puck's playing video games. They had invited Kurt to come along, but he really needed to talk to his dad today, so he's asked him to come home for lunch.

 

“Kurt, I just walked in the door. Where is everybody?' Burt smiled at seeing his son.

 

“All out, which is why I asked you to come home for lunch. I really need to talk to you, Dad,” Kurt said. He had meant this to be casual, but seeing Burt standing there and knowing that whatever he said, Burt would take it to heart and really listen...Kurt sniffed and averted his eyes, but it didn't help. Burt could see the need in his son and opened his arms, grunting as Kurt flew into them.

 

“Is everyone okay, Kiddo?”

 

“Yeah, nothing like that, but I need to talk. Is that okay?” Kurt said, suddenly shy. He hadn't done this in a long time.

 

“Of course, Kurt. I'm always available for you. Tell me,” he encouraged as he steered Kurt to the sofa in the family room and sat down, pulling Kurt close to his side and keeping his arm around him.

 

“It's about Blaine,” Kurt started. “Ever since he ran away and got home it's been...different.”

 

“Different how?” Burt asked, hoping this was not about something he didn't understand, like details of sexual positions or something. Well, if it was he would do his best to find the answer. 

 

“He and I were so glad to see each other, he was cuddly and clingy for a while, then it was just a return to normal. You know he has trust issues, but we can usually get past that. I thought after all this time, he trusted me implicitly.”

 

“Has he give you some indication that he doesn't now?”

 

“No. You know about the whole thing with his finding out Cooper is his father and he went to go see Sasha – which I think is part of why he ran away – and I've encouraged him to talk to me about it. Then the whole thing with Brittany came up, and of course that was paramount on our list. But she is in recovery now and I have wanted to get back to talking about what is happening with us. Blaine changes the subject or just plain refuses to discuss it at all. I am so frustrated. We need some kind of mediator maybe? Cooper is at the heart of it all, or a good part of it, so I can't ask him. Blaine needs someone who he sees as being impartial, somebody that can see his side of things so we can figure this out,” Kurt rushed it all out, afraid if he stopped, he couldn't continue.

 

Burt sat still for a while, trying to understand exactly what Kurt was asking him. 

 

“Do you think he wants to leave you, Kurt? Is that what this is about?” Burt asked.

 

“No. If he wanted to leave, he just wouldn't have come back in the first place. No, it's more like he's scared of something, but so scared he won't say it. His nightmares have been pretty bad. Nothing like that one violent one, but he's having more of them and more frequently. Last week I had to ask Puck to stay the night because I was too exhausted to wake up with them. Finn did it one night, too.” Kurt looked away again. He knew what was coming.

 

“Kurt, why didn't you tell me? You know we can do something, increase his sedatives at night, or his anti-anxiety pills. We've done that before and the doctor is okay with it. You should have told me, Kurt.”

 

“Dad, I wasn't keeping it from you, but Puck was here and it was just easy to ask him. Blaine slept fine those nights, and I got caught up on my sleep. Finn was great, too. They care about Blaine, and they must care about me because they are always willing to come over to stay if I'm tired. We're graduating soon, and we need to depend on each other, Dad.”

 

“You're right, Kurt. But back to the problem at hand: would you want me to talk to Blaine? I know he used to be scared of me, but things between us are good now. I talk to him in the mornings, anyway, maybe I can take him to breakfast tomorrow morning if you...ah....have plans with Rachel or Mercedes?”

 

“That can be arranged. Thank you, Dad. You're the best,” Kurt smiled. He was grown up enough to know that not everything had an answer, but it just felt like having his dad in his corner would make this all right again. He hugged his dad, brushing his cheek with his lips before going into the kitchen to serve lunch.

 

 

* * *

 

“Hey, Sport, want to go get some breakfast with me?” Burt asked Blaine as he entered the kitchen the next morning. Kurt had gone to Rachel's for a sleep over to help Mercedes find a new look for the upcoming school dance. Finn had slept in Blaine's bed, but was still sleeping. Blaine didn't mind, he knew he needed somebody there in case of a nightmare and Finn was actually good to talk to once in a while. He never got the idea he was a bother when it was Finn staying with him.

 

“Hey, Burt, I'd love to. But don't think you can have bacon just because Kurt isn't there to watch you,” he grinned. 

 

 

Sitting in Burt's office at the shop, Blaine opened the bag of food and set it out on the table he had hastily cleaned off, moving a carburetor and a pot of grease to the side to make room. He got the dishes out of the tiny cupboard above the sink and placed napkins at each place. Then Burt came in, carrying a chair for Blaine and they sat down to eat.

 

“This was a great idea, I haven't had a breakfast burrito in so long. Kurt won't let me eat chilies for breakfast,” Blaine lamented, dropping Tabasco on the egg and sausage and potato stuffing. Burt pulled his out: a white egg version with turkey sausage that he had learned to love. 

 

“I'll get down to brass tacks here, sport. Kurt is concerned about you and he asked me to step in. He thinks you need somebody in your corner, and I agreed with him that I can have your back as long as I know what's bothering you,” Burt said. He wasn't one to beat around the bush or coddle Blaine. And Blaine appreciated it. 

 

“Is it that I ran away?” Blaine asked. He thought he'd cleared that up with Kurt, explaining his fear that he would hurt him during a PTSD episode. 

 

“Nope. It's after you came back. He says you have issues with Cooper, which I understand, and maybe this thing with poor Brittany getting in the way of you two communicating?” Burt probed.

 

“Yeah, that's all true. But the thing with Cooper? Not going away, not going to get better over night. Maybe it's not my place to have opinions about something that happened nine months before I was born, but I cannot get over the circumstances of it all. In my mind, Sasha raped him. Period. End of sentence. I won't change my mind over that, but Cooper is aware of my feelings. Kurt has expressed his agreement over this, but he refuses to get in the middle of it with Coop and I. And, truth be told, I'm glad. I can deal with the situation. I will visit with Sasha one day, but I'm not ready yet,” Blaine said, drumming his fingers on the table until Burt looked at them, Blaine stopped. He was agitated, but Burt acknowledged that and it passed.

 

“I think there is something else, Blaine. You don't have to tell me, but if you choose to, I think you know it will go no further. I am not comfortable hearing details about sex, which I think you already know, too. But Blaine, your health and happiness are more important than my comfort in this. If it is a sexual issue between you and Kurt, you can tell me. I will do my best to find an answer for you. Okay?” He was seven shades or red, but Burt was not one to back down when something as important as his boys' was concerned, and he meant to see it through.

 

“No, Burt. We're fine...ah...no problems with anything concerning that,” Blaine said, almost as red as Burt. Burt sighed in relief. So did Blaine. But now there was no more conjecture and Blaine was pretty sure he was going to have to actually face the problem. Kurt must have been desperate if he asked his father to step in.

 

“There is a problem, but Kurt is totally unaware of it. I hope by my telling you, it will go no further, and anything I say about Kurt will not upset you and make you think you have to talk to him about it. It is not what it seems at first, so could you please hold judgment, okay?”

 

All kinds of things went through Burt's mind, but he agreed. If it were something that involved Kurt's health, Blaine wouldn't have asked him that. He agreed to Blaine's terms.

 

“It's about Santana,” Blaine said, then looked away, blinking very fast. Burt's eyes widened, but he got himself under control very quickly.

 

“Okay,” He said in as even a voice as he could conjure.

 

“While I was...ah...missing...you know Kurt's friends came to comfort him,” Blaine said.

 

“Yeah, they were looking for you, Blaine, it wasn't just to do with Kurt, it was both of you. You know that, right?” Burt asked

 

“I like to think so,” Blaine said in a small voice. “Kurt told me that he had been pretty bad off, depressed and just short of despondent.” Burt nodded and Blaine continued, “He had even stopped eating and bathing when you went to Washington with Carole. Santana came to comfort him. He was so bad off, she took him into the shower. She was in there with him, bathing him. Both naked. Now, I know Kurt is gay, we all know that, but skin is skin and I am worried maybe something happened that …..in the name of comfort, I mean...and.....” he ran out of words. Burt put a hand to his back. Blaine wasn't done. “I just dismissed that. I knew Santana slept in the same bed with him, the way Kurt does with me, just so he knew somebody cared, you know? But one night we were sleeping and I woke up, really restless, and Kurt was sound asleep. He called me by her name. 

 

“Then when Brittany had this terrible thing happen to her? Kurt has taken Santana into his arms several times. In the hospital waiting room, in Britt's room. I was sitting there, and there was nothing to be jealous about – Tana's girlfriend was sick, she needed to know her friends were there. But I was in this jealous rage inside. What made it worse was that I knew it was unfair, that Kurt is the most faithful person on earth, but I wanted to cry and scream for her to go away and not touch my boyfriend. I don't know what to do with this jealousy, especially since it is so unfounded,” Blaine was crying now, the confession so new and his nerves so raw.

 

Burt did understand, and he held up his arms as he had for Kurt just the day before. And Blaine did the same thing, he hurled himself into Burt's embrace and cried his heart out. 

 

“Oh, Burt, that's the first time I've really put it all into a single thought. I can see now I was wrong, that Kurt is only doing the exact same thing I would do in his place. I was so worried he might love Santana,” he moaned.

 

“Blaine, he does love her. But he loves her the way he loves Finn or Carole or Rachel. She is a kind and wonderful girl, and I'm willing to bet you love her, too, in spite of her prickly attitude?” Blaine nodded. “But as for falling in love? Kurt thinks you are the love of his life, sport. I don't think that's going to change.” 

 

Blaine smiled. He felt like in talking to Burt that the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders. They finished their breakfast in silence, just happy to be sitting there with less cares than when they walked in.

 

 

That night after dinner, Kurt served a chocolate German Chocolate cake with coconut-pecan frosting. Both Blaine and Burt knew why, and they smiled at each other.

 

* * *

 

 

“I've been thinking about what Brittany told us last week, about being so far from her friends,” Blaine started.

 

“Me, too, I feel so bad for her, but what can we do?” Kurt asked. “We can drive over to see her once a week, but I know it's going to be hard on Santana,” Kurt said.

 

“I might have a solution. It would take a while, but since they're saying Brittany has to be in rehab for almost a year, we might be able to do something,” Blaine smiled. “I'll have to talk to Cooper, but...” 

 

Kurt grinned, realizing what Blaine must be thinking. 

 

 

The reconciliation between Cooper and Blaine was still a little tense, and both treated it with kid gloves, but it was returning to the old camaraderie, slowly. Cooper had been terribly worried about Blaine, who treated his father's worry with careless abandon, and so they just slowly drifted back together. It was agreed that Blaine would not go to see Sasha, nor allow her to come see him for the time being. He was working with his therapist about it, and he eventually wanted to have a relationship, but he was too angry right now to just do it. Cooper was slow to understand, his eyes blinded by his renewed love for her, but with Kurt's insistent encouragement, he was going to let Blaine decide when and where and even if there would be a meeting. 

 

Less than two weeks after Kurt and Blaine cooked up the idea, Cooper and Blaine were sitting in Coop's office, going over the final paperwork. The Anderson Therapy and Rehabilitation Center was going to be a reality. There would be opportunities for a lot of people to benefit from this center. Carole was finishing up on her certification to be a PA, and would work at the Center, Sophia helped to staff it with friends from her years of counseling, and work had already begun on making the mansion ready.

 

“I feel really good about this,” Cooper said, smiling at his son. “It was a brilliant idea, which makes me so proud of you.”

 

“Thank you, Cooper. I just saw such a need for it, and we had talked about doing something for the community. It's good that we could take such a terrible thing, like what had happened in that house, and turn it into something good. I would hope our ancestors, like Nathaniel Anderson who made the Underground Railroad station, would be proud of what we have done with his mansion,” Blaine smiled and Cooper smiled back at him.

 

“You know, Blaine, I will buy you a house here in Lima. I know we talked about neither of us wanting to live in the house anymore, and I'm happy it can be used for such a good cause, but you can have a house – or an apartment if you would like?”

 

“I'm perfectly content living with the Hummels. You're not moving back to live here in Lima, are you?” Blaine asked.

 

“Probably not. I can stay until you graduate from high school, of course, but you're leaving then, aren't you? Kurt is going to college in New York and I thought that was your ambition, too.”

 

“Yeah, it is. I might come back here one day, but that is our plan. I'd really like it if you were in New York, too,” Blaine blushed a little. He still found it hard to think about Cooper being his father. The subject of Sasha had come up a few times, Cooper anxious to have Blaine meet with her and get to know her – but every time, Blaine had an anxiety attack or he just plain refused to talk about her. Cooper had spoken to Blaine's therapist (with his permission, of course), but even the therapist said that Blaine had to decide that in his own time. He'd already had so much happen, and he needed to be allowed to take things as slowly as he needed – and Cooper needed to respect that. It had gotten to the point that Sasha wasn't ever mentioned between the two at all.

 

This was breaking Cooper's heart. He had immediately taken up the relationship where it had left off, albeit a more mature one, but Sasha remained the love of his life and he saw no change in that at all. He was very anxious for Blaine to bond with her, but he also knew forcing him to do so would result in Blaine resenting them both, and that would get them nowhere. Cooper got more upset about it as time went on, but he recognized his own inability to change it. 

 

Cooper knew it was risky to mention it, but maybe, since Blaine was in such a good mood and Kurt wasn't here.....

 

“You know your mom will be in New York.”

 

“What? She's in the state prison....oh, you mean Sasha. Well, New York is a big city, we probably won't run into each other,” Blaine said, getting up to pace back and forth in Coop's office. He didn't want to hurt his father's feelings, but he really did not want to talk about his mother. He closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. Cooper could see and feel the tension building.

 

“So, where's Kurt today?” he asked, although Blaine had already mentioned it earlier.

 

“He had to practice with Rachel for that try-out for NYADA,” Blaine said, wishing Kurt was here with him. He sighed again, wishing this day was over. 

 

“I can drive you back to Lima now – we're done with the paperwork and I don't have any more appointments today. I called Carole earlier and told her I was staying at their house for a while before I had to fly into New York next week. How about we get a late lunch and then hit the road?” Cooper asked, trying not to let Blaine's reluctance to talk about Sasha upset him.

 

“Can we have Greek?” Blaine asked, excited since there wasn't a Greek restaurant in Lima.

 

“Of course! Let's go,” Cooper shut out the office lights and put on his suit jacket as they left the office, locking the door on the way.

 

 

* * *

 

** Later that evening:  **

 

 

“What's wrong, Blaine?” Kurt asked, moving closer to rub Blaine's neck as they sat on the sofa in the family room watching a movie. 

 

“Just a little tense. Everything for the Therapy Center is going great, and it looks like we can open at least part of it by the end of next month. Then Brittany can move back here. I know she's just one person, but she was really the catalyst for Cooper and I making the Center a reality,” Blaine enthused. Kurt smiled at his boyfriend, happy he was so excited.

 

“With everything Santana has done for me, Kurt, I would move heaven and earth to help her, and the best way I can see to help her is to help Brittany,” Blaine explained, a wistful look on his face. 

 

“Blaine, you are the kindest person I have ever known,” Kurt smiled at the boy he loved, then tugged him into an embrace. “Do you know how much I love you?”

 

Blaine answered by kissing Kurt, looking into his blue gray eyes and kissing him again. No matter how long they knew each other, the sweetest thing Blaine could ever do was kiss his Kurt. He closed his eyes in thanks to a god he didn't believe in that he had been united with this wonderful angel. They kissed again and again, blanking out the rest of the world until they finally came apart, breathing heavily and needing to take a second to wind down before they noticed Finn sitting in the armchair across from them.

 

“Oh, sorry, Finn...I didn't realize you were there,” Blaine blushed.

 

“Obviously. But no worries, it doesn't bother me. I kiss Rachel in the hallway at school – I figure if I can get away with that, you can kiss in your own house. Just be glad it was me and not Burt that was sitting here,” Finn said, his eyes on the TV screen.

 

“Yeah, no kidding,” Kurt sighed, a little abashed he got caught in such a dramatic exchange with Blaine.

 

“Oh...and what is that supposed to mean?” Burt said, Kurt, Blaine, and Finn's eyes shifting across the room to see Burt leaning on the bar that separated the kitchen from the family room. They all jumped.

 

“Nothing, Dad, I just didn't want to disrespect you. Ah, how long have you been standing there?” Kurt asked in a sheepish tone, not meeting his father's eyes but thinking about how hot and heavy the kissing session had gotten before they noticed Finn.

 

“Long enough that clearing my throat, tapping my beer bottle on the counter, and talking to Carole on the phone didn't disturb the make-out session in my family room,” Burt growled out, shooting sparks out of his eyes as he looked at the two blushing boys. “But the lawn needs to be mowed, so maybe the two of you could get busy getting that done instead of removing each other's tonsils?” he barked.

 

Kurt and Blaine got up in a flash and were out the back door, on their way to the garage for the mower and clippers before Burt could utter another sound. It wasn't until the sound of the mower starting was heard that Finn dared to look at Burt. But what he saw made his mouth open in shock: there was Burt, laughing so hard his belly shook, his face was red and he had dropped his beer bottle. It was one of those laughs that was so hard, he wasn't making any sound at first, and Finn just sat and looked at Burt for a few heartbeats before he started laughing, too.

 

“Oh, my god, Finn – did you see the look on Blaine's face? He thought I was going to eat him alive! And Kurt, I haven't seen him that scared since he was ten years old and carved his name in my rocking chair!! Oh, I'm going to bust a gut...I better calm down before they come back inside.” Burt continued to chuckle, breaking into a laugh every now and then. “And over just some kissing!!” Burt said, starting the belly laughing again.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 


	14. Paper Cranes

 

The New Directions sat in the library, moving there from the choir room because they had to use tables, and there weren't any in the choir room. Mercedes was standing at the front of the room with the tables arranged around her.

 

“I learned how to do this when I was a child,” she said, setting the brightly colored paper on the table in front of her and glancing up at her friends and fellow classmates. They all had paper, of many different colors and patterns, and were watching her fold the intricate designs.

 

 

This had been Kurt's idea, to fold the elegant paper cranes to hang from the ceiling of the new Anderson Center for therapy in honor of Blaine and Cooper, who donated the building and grounds. 

 

Kurt got the idea when he read a book about a little girl named Sadako Sasaki. She lived in Japan during World War II was affected by the Atom bomb when it landed on Hiroshima, in 1945. She died of leukemia due to the exposure. She had heard that if you folded one thousand paper cranes, your wish would come true, so she started folding any piece of paper she could find...medicine wrappers, newspapers, gift paper from other patients in the hospital. She had only folded 644 cranes when she died at the tender age of twelve, and her friends folded the rest so she was buried with one thousand cranes.

 

The students of McKinley decided to fold the cranes for Brittany and decorate her room in them. They had two weeks to fold them, so Mercedes was teaching as many people as possible to do it, and they in turn would teach others. There were already many cardboard boxes filled with the brightly colored paper birds.

 

“I think this is so sweet,” Tina said, “Can you imagine the look on her face when she goes in her room to find these?”

 

“It will be wonderful,” Rachel chimed in, pressing her fingertips against the fold in the paper to make sure it stayed creased and then adding a tiny gold star to make the bird's eye. 

 

“My mother says this will bring good luck to the Center,” Mike added, a smile on his face as he sat close to Tina to help her through the difficult folds.

 

Puck just sat and stared at the paper, until Kurt finally came to his rescue and guided him through the intricate folding. Puck was so thrilled it had come out that he whooped and hollered, a huge grin breaking out on his face. 

 

The project to fold the cranes drew more volunteers and soon most of the students of McKinley had folded at least one crane, as did many of the teachers and staff. The boxes were filling and Kurt took them home to string on heavy fishing line so they could be pinned to the ceiling in streamers. The Anderson Center was on everyone's lips that week, knowing how much it was needed in the community.

 

 

* * *

 

Cooper was driving up to the Hummel house to pick up Blaine. Kurt had called him the day before to ask him to do this, and wouldn't answer any questions, but Coop was happy to do it. They were opening the doors to the Anderson Center today, and Kurt had arranged some sort of celebration. 

 

Cooper walked into the house and Blaine was sitting in the family room waiting for him. He threw his arms around his son, holding him tightly and dropping a quick kiss on his temple. Cooper hadn't seen Blaine in a few weeks and he was surprised at how much he missed him, given that he had either called or Skyped him every evening. Of course, Cooper knew what was wrong, but he was still at a loss as to how to fix it. Blaine had been so excited that he was finally going to meet his birth mother, but that meeting hadn't gone well at all and now with all the time for the anxiety to build in Blaine's mind, it seemed insurmountable. 

 

That, however, was a problem for another day. Today was going to be a joyous occasion. They were opening the Center.

 

“Ready, Squirt?” Coop asked.

 

“I was born ready...” Blaine kidded, smiling up into Cooper's face. Honestly, Cooper had never seen a more beautiful boy. He may not be gay, but he could appreciate beauty when it was standing there, staring him in the face. It did not even occur to him that it might have something to do with this particular boy being his son...but really, everywhere Blaine went, people tended to look at him. He was gorgeous with that silky mop of black curls and the golden tanned complexion, the hazel and green eyes framed with thick fans of lush lashes, and that hundred mega-watt smile. 

 

They got in the car for the trip to the Center and Blaine tuned the radio to a pop station and sang along as they drove. 

 

“Hey, Squirt, how does this feel? Are you having any reservations about giving the mansion up?” Cooper asked.

 

“No. I mean...it still belongs to us, but I'm happy we are putting it to such a good use. It was strange when I went through it with the designers and Kurt...having the den as the new reception room and my bedroom as a resident dorm. I'm happy we left the library alone, though. And the room in the attic. It may have been the scene of all my worst nightmares for so many years, but I also had some good things happen in that room. I met and fell in love with Kurt there.” Blaine smiled, thinking about the love of his life.

 

“You were conceived in that room, you know,” Cooper said before he thought it out, and the silence was like all the air had been sucked out of the car. He knew how stupid it was to say that, but it was too late and he heard Blaine struggling to take in a breath. Oh, shit.

 

Cooper pulled the car over to the side of the road, hurrying around to Blaine's door and opening it. He undid the seatbelt and pulled Blaine into his arms, asking him to take a breath, that he was going to be okay, that he was sorry. Blaine sat quietly trying to calm himself. He wanted Kurt, he wanted to twine his arms in Kurt's, to bury his nose in Kurt's neck, to have Kurt kiss him and tell him everything was going to be okay. But Kurt wasn't there, only Cooper was. Well, he had to learn to do this by himself one day – Kurt couldn't be there all the time, even if they were married. He took that deep cleansing breath and opened his eyes.

 

“I'll be okay, Cooper. It kind of shook me up, but it's fine. I do intend to see Sasha one day, I'm just not there yet. Let's get going, I don't want to be late for the dedication,” Blaine said.

 

Back in the car, Cooper took Blaine's hand and held it on the console the rest of the way there. 

 

 

The dedication was a small celebration, all of the boy's friends were there. Blaine and Cooper walked in to find the strings of paper cranes all over the lobby, strings of them hanging from the ceiling. The room was painted bright, cheerful colors and all the furnishings were modern and new. Both Cooper and Blaine could see Kurt's influence in the beautiful designs. 

 

“Blaine!” came a shout from one of the sofa's and he turned to see Brittany sitting there, Santana by her side, looking so happy. He went over and sat next to her, taking her hand and kissing her cheek.

 

“You look so pretty today, honey, I'm glad you're here,” Blaine told her before Santana reached over to hug him close. She kissed his cheek and leaned close to his ear.

 

“Thank you, Blaine, I know you did this for me. I love you,” she whispered. He hugged her back before his eyes fell on Kurt.

 

Kurt was dressed in his finest, as always, and looked like the brightest star in the heavens to Blaine. His hair was perfect, his blue eyes were sparkling, and his clothes were perfect. Blaine couldn't get over to him fast enough to throw his arms around him in gratitude for all the things Kurt had done to make this day possible. 

 

“Oh, Kurt, this is too beautiful, you are so talented, so generous, so...Kurt. I love you,” Blaine said, his face buried in Kurt's neck as he spilled out his thanks to his wonderful boyfriend.

 

“I love you, too, baby. But here, dry your eyes, the press is here to take your picture for the paper. Let me redo your bow tie, I think it's a bit worse for wear after all the hugging,” Kurt said, trying to hold back the happy tears. 

 

The day was the best it could have possibly been. All their friends and most of the parents had come, along with dignitaries from the city and new staff that would start the next day. Sophia came over, leaning heavily on Puck's arm, to give Cooper and Blaine both a kiss.

 

The speeches were not formal, but very heartfelt, and Sophia got up to speak in front of the crowd of friends:

 

“You have done a wonderful thing, you know. This has been needed here for a long time and just as your ancestor saw a need during the time of unrest and slavery to try to help, the two of you have fulfilled your family legacy and made this a place to help people in need. I stand in admiration of the two of you. From the bottom of my heart, and I know I speak for the whole community, thank you.”

 

 

The party went on into the night, everyone dancing and having a wonderful time. Brittany had gone to bed in her new room, which happened to be Blaine's old room redecorated, earlier and at the end of the evening, Blaine and Kurt went to see her.

 

“Brittany? Are you still awake, honey?” Kurt asked at the door, seeing Santana sitting in a rocking chair beside the bed.

 

“Kurt, yes, I'm awake. Did you come to say goodnight? Tana told me you would,” she said sleepily from the bed.

 

“Yes, we just wanted to make sure you were okay,” Blaine said, coming to sit on the bedside for a minute. He took her hand and looked into her blue eyes.

 

“I'm doing well, thank you. I can think more clearly, and the doctors have figured out that I was saying such silly things because that thing was pressing on my brain. Now I don't understand how I could ever have thought that a cat was reading my diary or any of the other foolish things I said. I'm so embarrassed. Did people really think I was that stupid?” she looked at Kurt and then at Blaine.

 

“No, it was just that most students in school are so stressed that they don't think. Your problems were so gradual that they weren't even noticed at first, then it just seemed the way you were – and we all loved you so much, nobody wanted to say that there was something wrong. I'm sorry, Brittany, I was as oblivious as the rest, and I've known you since kindergarten,” Kurt told the girl. 

 

“But, you have come such a long way, I know you will recover completely. They are now just thinking it's a matter of time and letting you get used to having your whole brain to use once again, right? That and letting the physical scars heal,” Blaine asked.

 

“Yes, and I will get better every day now because my Santana is here with me, and that is all due to you guys. I love you,” she smiled at Kurt and Blaine. Tana smiled, too, and walked the boys to the door. 

 

“Thank you both for everything you've done,” she said, a tiny hitch in her voice. “Who knew when we rescued the Prince in the Tower,” she said, play-punching Blaine in the shoulder, “that it would end up so right?”

 

“It did that, Tana, it did. Goodnight.”

 

* * *

 

 

Back at the Hummel house, Cooper was sitting with Kurt and Blaine at the dining table. They had gotten home from the dedication hours before, but none of them were tired. 

 

“I think you should tell Kurt about the spell you had on the way to the Center today, Blaine,” Cooper said.

 

“What spell? Are you okay?” Kurt asked, looking over at Blaine who was curled in the armchair by himself.

 

“I just got a little upset, had some trouble getting my breath. Coop stopped the car and I calmed myself down and we got back on the road. No big deal,” Blaine said, giving his father an unhappy look. He didn't need him to tattle every little thing to Kurt. 

 

“What brought it on?” Kurt asked, looking at Blaine.

 

Blaine was just relieved he hadn't directed his look to Cooper.

 

“He mentioned Sasha.”

 

“And?” Kurt asked.

 

“That was all. I am still not ready to see her. I saw her once, I've forgiven her, but I don't want to see her. Okay?” he said with a bit of hostility. Cooper cringed. “And I don't need any of that, Cooper. I make the decision, not you – in this, anyway. I'm not ready, got it?”

 

“Yes, Blaine. I respect that. I apologize, it won't happen again.” Cooper sighed. He had to tell Blaine his news, and the sooner the better, but this was making it harder. He looked at Kurt, but got no encouragement there. “I'm going to bed. I'll see you in the morning, okay?”

 

“Okay. Goodnight, Coop, we're headed to bed, too. 

 

* * *

 

 

“So....tell me.” Kurt cooed at Blaine, running his fingers through Blaine's curls as he settled his head on Kurt's chest. They were in bed, wearing their silk pajamas and cuddled under the warm blankets.

 

Blaine sighed, knowing he couldn't get away with pretending he didn't understand what Kurt was talking about. 

 

“He keeps pressing me to go see Sasha. I saw her once, I don't know why I need to go back, and Coop insisting that I do is making me not want to even more. I mean, maybe if he'd leave me alone about it I might get used to the idea, but with him pushing.....I just want to dig in my heels,” Blaine explained. 

 

“If I recall correctly, you had been very anxious to meet her at one point, and I know we discussed you finding her and not telling Coop at first because you were worried about making him upset,” Kurt mentioned, determined to get it all out on the table.

 

“That is true, but when he found her first, I felt like I was just a last thought. Obviously, they would bond again, but I was an accident – and not a happy one at all. Shit, Kurt, I was the cause of their ruined lives, for god's sake. How can I go and make it all okay now?” Blaine began to breathe faster, and Kurt recognized he was headed toward an anxiety attack.

 

He sat up and pulled Blaine into his lap, stroking down his back and making shushing noises, trying to calm him. 

 

“Blaine, honey, you were not the cause of any of that. It was beyond your control – all of it. They made the decisions, they may have been children themselves, but they still made the decisions to have sex. Even at the age of eleven, Cooper knew where babies came from. You cannot blame yourself for any of that. Or for anything that came after. You were lied to, neglected and abused. It. Is. Not. Your. Fault.” Kurt put his arms tighter around Blaine's waist and pulled him close. 

 

“I know...well, in my head I know, but in my heart? I am so confused,” Blaine confessed. 

 

“Do you want to have some sort of relationship with Sasha?” Kurt asked. “I mean one where you set the ground rules to begin with and then see her for short periods of time, all on your terms? I think she'd agree to that.”

 

“Yes, but I don't want to upset Cooper. I don't want him there, it makes me nervous. He usually doesn't, I love him, but I want to meet her without him there,” Blaine said.

 

“I can try calling her to set it up. I won't even be there, it can be just you and her,” Kurt offered.

 

“Oh, no...Kurt, if it's okay, I want you to be there,” he said, his grip on his boyfriend's shirt tightening. “I won't do it without you.” Blaine gave him a pleading look.

 

“Okay, baby. Do you want me to call her?” 

 

“Yes. Thank you, Kurt. I think I can do it if Cooper isn't there. I just can't get over the fact that he was only eleven – he may have been consenting, but he was still a child and I blame her.”

 

 

Kurt just lay back and let Blaine rest beside him. He was tired, but gearing up for the night. It followed a pattern sometimes, Blaine having a spell and being anxious, followed by a nightmare. Kurt yawned and decided to close his eyes, he was so tired. He leaned forward and kissed Blaine, murmuring a few love whispers in Blaine's ear before falling into a fitful sleep. 

 

Blaine lay awake for over an hour. He knew the pattern as well as Kurt, and he also knew how tired Kurt was from all the work he had done on the Center. He had that feeling he got that preceded a nightmare, so he stayed awake, thinking of what to say to Sasha when he met with her. Exhaustion finally took him and he fell asleep, arms around Kurt's waist and nose buried in Kurt's neck. For once, he slept the rest of the night without a nightmare. 

 

 

* * *

 

“Is this Sasha Maguire?” Kurt asked when her voice came on the line.

 

“Yes, this is Sasha,” the voice said.

 

“This is Kurt Hummel. We met...”

 

“Kurt! Of course I know who you are, you're Blaine's boyfriend,” Sasha said, her voice becoming apprehensive. “What can I do...is Blaine alright?”

 

“Yes, he's fine, Miss Maguire. I am calling on his behalf actually.”

 

“Oh, call me Sasha, please. What can I do? I want to reach out to him, I want to be part of his life, but Cooper says he won't talk to me. I don't want to scare Blaine, I just want to explain things to him. I want to know him...” her sobs were barely covered up as she tried to remain calm.

 

“It's about that, Sasha. He wants to meet with you, but he doesn't want Cooper there. He wants to see you alone. Well, not entirely, he asked me to come with him, but he wants to see you without Cooper. He knows the meeting you had six months ago didn't go well, but he's been working through the shock of having parents that are not the ones he knew all his life. You can imagine his confusion, I'm sure. Well, I could tell you more, but I think it's better if you just meet with him?” Kurt asked, hope in his voice.

 

“Of course. Any time, anywhere. Just tell me and I'll be there,” Sasha agreed.

 

“I think neutral ground...just so there are no reminders of the bad things. Would it be okay if we met in Columbus on Friday afternoon and met at a hotel room?”

 

“Yes, I can do anything Blaine asks. I'll be there, just text me the information. I'll be there. And...thank you, Kurt. You have no idea how much I appreciate your helping this along. I do love Blaine, as I know you do, and I want to make it right.”

 

 

* * *

 

Okay, Blaine, we'll be there in fifteen minutes. Are you doing okay?” Kurt asked his boyfriend as they drove along the highway. Blaine was sitting in the passenger seat, his hand holding Kurt's so tightly he was in danger of cutting off the circulation. He realized this and relaxed a bit, giving Kurt an apologetic look. 

 

“I told Cooper we were doing this,” Blaine said. “Well, I texted him when we left the house. He's texted me back about twenty times, but I didn't read them, I just shut off my phone. I don't want him to influence me.”

 

“He must be texting me then, because I've felt my phone vibrate just about constantly all the way here. I thought it was my dad, and I was going to turn it back on when we hit Columbus. Maybe it's better we don't turn it on until after we meet with Sasha?” Kurt asked.

 

“Agreed.”

 

“Okay, here we are. Let's check in and she should be here in an hour. Do you want to eat first?” Kurt asked.

 

“Yeah, there's a restaurant in the hotel, we can just eat there and then wait. Damn, I'm nervous, but I think this will go okay, don't you?” Blaine commented, looking at Kurt for approval.

 

“I think so. You've wanted to speak with her and this will be the perfect time, with nothing to distract you. I can be in another room if you want?” Kurt offered.

 

“No. I want you right by my side. Kurt. I am so much better than I was a year and a half ago. I was so happy to be rescued out of the attic, but I was still trapped, imprisoned, in my mind. I was so messed up. I'm not saying I'm all better – I still have spells and nightmares, but I don't feel lost anymore. I don't feel hopeless. I feel like I belong, and you are the one that did that for me. I love you, Kurt.” Blaine looked at Kurt with tears shining in his eyes and Kurt took his hand once again.

 

“I love you, too, Bee.”

 

 

After eating at the restaurant...well, they ordered, but both boys just picked at their food and finally gave up and went to their room to await Sasha. Blaine sat on the sofa, his arms wrapped around Kurt as they just enjoyed each other in their silence. They both jumped when they heard a knock at the door.

 

Blaine went over to open it, Kurt waiting on the sofa so as not to intrude, but came running when he heard a crash.

 

“Blaine? Blaine!” Kurt yelled, skidding around the corner to see his boyfriend out cold on the floor and Sasha standing over him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Read about Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes in the book by that name by Eleanor Coerr. 
> 
> Sadako Sasaki died of leukemia she contracted when the atomic bomb fell on Hiroshima in 1945. Her story is both heartbreaking and inspirational.


	15. Kicking and Screaming

“Blaine? Blaine!” Kurt yelled, 

 

 

“What happened?” Kurt shouted, panicked as he felt for Blaine's pulse in his neck, relieved to find it strong and even. Sasha was on her knees, her coat was still on and dragging on the floor as she held Blaine's hand, patting it as though that would bring him back to consciousness. 

 

“I don't know...he opened the door and before I could say hello, he had fainted,” Sasha said, looking very worried. 

 

Blaine had opened his eyes by now, looking very confused, but locked his gaze on Kurt's face.

 

“It's okay, baby, let me get you to the sofa. Do you know what happened?” he asked Blaine as he lifted him into his arms for a minute before helping him over to the sofa in the suite. He settled Blaine down and turned to see that Sasha was still kneeling on the floor.

 

“Sasha? Do you need some help?” Kurt asked, moving back to her and offering his hand. She grasped it, tugging a bit to keep her balance as she got awkwardly to her feet. She stood a minute, turned half away from Kurt before she was steady, then turning towards him and starting to remove her heavy coat. Kurt just stared. His hands went out to her to steady her on her feet before dropping to his sides.

 

First thought: Sasha was pregnant. Very pregnant. Last time he had seen her, she was slim bordering on skinny and now...

 

His second thought was: _Blaine!_

 

Kurt nodded at Sasha to follow and ran back to the sofa where Blaine had turned to face the back of the sofa, his shoulders shaking with sobs. This was a mess. 

 

“Do you want me to leave? I'm so sorry, Blaine, I thought Cooper told you...” Sasha said very reluctantly. She wanted to beg and shout, to grovel and ask Blaine not to throw her out, but she knew none of that would do any good at all. There was pain that was in her, made up of guilt and regret that was shaped like a tiny boy she had held only once...and she needed to resolve it some way. 

 

“No. Don't leave, Sasha, I'll be okay in a moment. Kurt? Hold me, please?” Blaine begged and Kurt was right there, gathering Blaine into his embrace as he pushed the curls out of Blaine's eyes and kissed his cheek.

 

 

It took a few minutes, but Blaine was able to get himself together and sat up. 

 

“Sorry, I was overwhelmed for a moment...Sasha? Want to tell me something?” Blaine asked, looking at Sasha.

 

“I thought Cooper told you. Now I feel terrible, Blaine. I would never have sprung this on you, I hope you know. This must be a shock, honey,” she said.

 

“How far along?” Kurt asked.

 

“Six months,” Sasha answered and Blaine cringed.

 

“Wow, you didn't waste any time, did you? What was it...the first day?” Blaine said with icy sarcasm worthy of Kurt.

 

“Ah, Blaine, I don't want to talk about that. But, yes, it's Cooper's baby. We didn't get a chance to raise you, but this time we will.”

 

“Well, nice you have a redo, isn't it? Sorry I didn't work out for you, but now you have a fresh start,” Blaine said, and tears began to run down Sasha's face.

 

Blaine just sat there, staring at Sasha. He didn't know if this was okay, if this was just some selfish thing they were indulging in, if he was the mistake and now they would have a real baby? The awful thoughts kept swimming around in his brain, causing him to feel terrible and confused. But this time he was determined to finish the conversation. He gripped Kurt's hand even tighter for a second, then relaxed so he wouldn't hurt him. Kurt's hand came up behind him to card through the curls on his neck. Sasha took a deep breath and to her credit, she didn't turn away.

 

“So....you and Cooper are...??” he wanted to give her every chance to explain herself.

 

“He found me that day, the day before I saw you... and I had given up. Your grandparents told me you were dead and I felt so much guilt. I was just....I don't know. But then Cooper came back. I had never stopped loving him. I know you must think it's crazy, but he was my life. Then after all that time, he was back.” Sasha wiped her eyes and Kurt offered her a tissue.

 

“Are you together now? because Coop hasn't mentioned that to me,” Blaine said, looking skeptical.

 

“Yes, he moved in with me a week after I last saw you, but I can see it's tearing him apart that you don't know. He wants to tell you, but he thinks you might not be able to take it, with all you've gone through. Blaine, we did not do this to hurt you. I love Cooper and I always have. We're happy together after being denied by his parents for so many years. It is in some ways like a new start, but we both want you to be a part of that,” she said, reaching to take Blaine's hand, but he jerked it away.

 

“Sorry? How can you be sorry after you just basically raped my father, threw me to the wolves and disappeared for the rest of my life while the Andersons tortured me?” Blaine shouted. Kurt understood what he was saying and put a protective arm around his irate boyfriend.

 

Sasha just sat there.

 

“I made mistakes, Blaine. I fell in love with Cooper. He was six years younger than I am, but we were in love. Then, when his mother threatened me, I was scared...for you. I wanted you to at least grow up with Cooper, to know him because he is the best parts of you, he loved you. But surely you know that? The Anderson's kept me away with blackmail, with threats, and with lies, and I was naive enough to believe them. I regret what I did, but I can be thankful you at least knew Cooper. You didn't have a family life - at least not a good one, so when we discovered we are having a baby, we thought it might make up for some of the bad things. Do you think it might?” Sasha asked. 

 

“I don't know. I need time to process all of this. To think about Cooper keeping this from me. To think about a lot of things, Sasha. Give me time,” Blaine said, closing his eyes to concentrate, to think what to do now, to think about how he was actually feeling. Kurt was getting worried, and he tightened his hold around Blaine's waist. It was as though he was holding Blaine from exploding into a million pieces. Kurt wanted to prevent that, but he also knew Blaine had to get it all off his chest – the anger, the confusion and everything he was feeling about Sasha right now.

 

Sasha looked pained for a moment and her hand went to her belly as she leaned over to ease some inner turmoil.

 

“Sasha? Are you okay?” Kurt asked, getting a little worried. She had dropped to her knees when Blaine fainted and now...what if something was wrong?

 

“I'm okay. The baby is just kicking. Just like you did, Blaine. A really strong kicker,” she smiled.

 

Blaine's eyes got big. He had never been near anyone that was pregnant, and suddenly the thought that this baby would be his brother or sister hit home. Not an adopted one, not a half-sibling, but a full-blooded brother or sister. He wanted in the worst way to touch Sasha's stomach, to feel this tiny bit of human kick, to bond somehow with it and tell it that he was its brother and he would protect it. 

 

“Sasha?” he asked, but it was so soft that only Kurt heard him and put his hand to Blaine's shoulder to let him know he was there.

 

Blaine coughed. “Sasha?” he asked a little louder. She looked at him. “Can I?” he asked, nodding at the rumbling movement in her belly.

 

“Of course you can. Here, give me your hand,” she offered and he put out his hand. She guided it to her belly, moving his fingers so they were stretched out and placed it on the place the baby was kicking. 

 

His eyes got even wider. “Oh...my..stars..Kurt, the baby …..I can feel it moving,” Blaine said, his face full of wonder. He pulled his hand back quickly, not wanting Sasha to get the wrong idea, that he somehow approved of this - because he didn't. But the sparkle didn't leave his eyes. 

 

“Well, Blaine, where do we go from here?” she asked, a hurt look in her eye, no doubt imagining Blaine shutting her out once again.

 

“Ah, I think I'm okay for now. I'm angry for everything that happened in my life...things I cannot get back. I'm having difficulty with what you did to Cooper, no matter how many times you or he says it was consensual, it was still rape in my mind,” Blaine spewed out, the bitterness sharp on his tongue.

 

Sasha sat still. She knew what it was, but had never come to terms with her guilt in the matter, or she believed she had been made to suffer because of her mistake already.

 

“Blaine, I know you are having trouble believing we could have been in love. In the same way your grandparents could never believe you love another boy. But you do love Kurt, and I accept that. Maybe you could try to be a little more open minded?” she asked, tired of being painted the villain. 

 

“You cannot compare the two at all!” This time it was Kurt that shouted his indignation. “How could having sex with a child compare to having a relationship between two boys? Oh, my stars, how ignorant are you?” he said, breathing fast and trying desperately to calm down his temper. 

 

“You're right, that was entirely unfair. I apologize, Kurt. And Blaine. It is not a valid comparison, but I did love Cooper, I do love Cooper. I admit I made a mistake, one I've spent my entire life being punished for. What do you want me to do? Leave now, and break your father's heart again? Spend the rest of my life in exile, never allowing myself to be happy again because of a mistake I made when I was a teenager? Tell me what to do, Blaine, and I'll do it,” Sasha said, sounding desperate and sobbing into her handkerchief. Her long red curls were a mess, her make-up was smeared and her eyes were swollen. 

 

“I don't know. I don't hate you, Sasha. I can't call you 'Mom' or anything like that, you were never a mother to me. But I think we might find a way to get along, I'm willing to try. Just not tonight. I'm so tired,” Blaine said in a soft voice, then turned to bury his face in Kurt's neck again. He was safe with Kurt. He didn't cry again, just sat still, letting Kurt rub his back and comb through his curls. Sasha watched, more than a little envious that Kurt was able to be that for Blaine when she was not. But in her heart, she was grateful Blaine had Kurt. 

 

Sasha stayed where she was. She didn't want to just leave, so she waited for Blaine to calm down. After a while, Blaine sat up, turning to see Sasha, but never letting go of Kurt for a moment. Blaine looked calmer and Kurt was grateful for that. He hadn't held out much hope of the two getting over the obstacles in their lives, but maybe this little baby was sent to heal them. 

 

 

Blaine's phone was vibrating once again and he realized he had never answered Cooper's messages from earlier. He picked it up and pushed the green button. Cooper's voice came shouting through the phone.

 

“Blaine! Oh, thank goodness you answered...have you talked to Sasha yet? I have to tell you something and it can't wait...can I come to where you are? Are you in Columbus? Oh, Blaine...I've made a terrible mistake and I need to tell you right now....”

 

“Coop. STOP. I am sitting with her right now. Ah, was there something you wanted to mention?” Blaine was going to give him a hard time.

 

“Yes...I wanted to tell you, but you were so upset when you last saw her and I felt guilty I'd forced you into seeing her and....what? She's sitting there? Ah...”

 

“Cooper. Calm down. It was a bit of a shock, I must say. Actually, I took one look at that belly and fainted. But we've talked and we're okay for now. Where are you?” Blaine asked.

 

“I'm driving around Columbus looking for your car,” Cooper confessed.

 

“Well, I'll text you the address and you can come here,” Blaine offered. 

 

* * *

 

 

Kurt answered the knock at the door and let Cooper in. Coop ran to Blaine's side, throwing his arms around the boy and dissolved in tears.

 

“Oh, Blaine, I'm so sorry. I wanted so much to tell you, but I was a coward and I didn't know how,” he sobbed into his son's shoulder.

 

Blaine put his arms around his father.

 

“It's okay now. We've talked. I got to feel the baby move,” he smiled a small smile at Cooper.

 

“Oh...I never got to feel you kicking, Blaine, and this is so unreal. I'm so happy, but I was also so worried about how you would take it. Are you...are you okay about it?” Cooper asked.

 

“A little late to be asking that now, isn't it?” Kurt murmured and earned a scowl from Cooper.

 

“I will be fine. Give me some time. But, am I happy to be getting a sister or brother? Yes, I am,” he said. 

 

“Should we tell him?” Sasha asked Cooper, and he nodded.

 

“You are going to have a baby sister, Blaine. It's a girl.” Sasha smiled. 

 

“A girl?” Blaine just beamed. He used to think about having a baby sister to play with and take care of, but that was just a childish dream. Now that it was going to be a reality, he was overjoyed. He kissed Kurt, smiling and bouncing in his seat a bit and Kurt smiled back at him.

 

“Are you going to live here in Columbus?” he asked, suddenly thinking it was important to be near Sasha.

 

“Actually, we will at first. She is due in January. But you and Kurt are going to go to college in New York, right?” Coop asked.

 

“Yes, that's the plan. We've already applied to several colleges there,” Blaine said.

 

“I think we will move to New York in the fall then, and be closer to you. I know you were screwed out of being a real family before, but all your mother and I want is for us to be a real family.” Cooper said, reaching over to hold Blaine's hand once again.

 

“We can try,” he said, not holding out much hope, but smiled first at Cooper, then at Sasha.

 

“It's getting late, maybe we should end this now and we can get together in the next week?” Sasha asked, trying to stifle a yawn.

 

“Okay. I'd like that,” Blaine said.

 

They all said their goodbyes and Cooper held Blaine in his arms for a long time before following Sasha down the hall. Blaine sighed, then walked back to Kurt in the hotel suite and sat next to him on the sofa.

 

 

* * *

 

“We can drive home tonight, Blaine, or, since we have the room for the night, we could just stay here?” Kurt asked.

 

“I'm fine with staying here, Kurt. It's a long drive and it's late. I'm exhausted after all that.”

 

“What are you feeling now?” Kurt asked.

 

“I honestly don't know. I'm angry, but that is sort of fading. I do understand what happened. I just cannot reconcile this in my head. How could Sasha justify what she's done? Cooper was an eleven year old child, and whether he was consenting or not, she was six years older and should have known better. What she did amounts to rape, and how can I condone that? I know Cooper is okay with it, but.....I'm just not. I'm confused, but that's something that will come with time. I'm excited I'm going to have a baby sister, but I just don't know,” Blaine said, shaking his head.

 

“I'm happy for you, Bee, about the sister part anyway. I think you will make the best big brother,” Kurt grinned, but then got serious. “I don't know what to say about Sasha. Yes, she should have known better, and I just don't know if you can sweep what she did under the rug. One part of me thinks you should let it go. Cooper was the victim, but he clearly doesn't see himself as a victim. He does appear to be happy, which is something he hasn't been for so many years, so...” Kurt stopped there, not wanting to influence Blaine one way or the other.

 

 

“Oh, Blaine. What a cluster-fuck,” Kurt said, dropping his face into his hands.

 

“What?” Blaine looked at him, astonished. Kurt was not one to use foul language when something creative would work. Blaine recalled distinctly the day Kurt, having gotten a slushie when he was wearing a cream colored sweater call the offending jock “Colostomy Seepage”. The fool didn't even know he'd been insulted until Coach Sylvester was seen to be clapping in appreciation down the hall, a grin on her face as she pretended not to have heard.

 

“Blaine, this is just a mess. I don't feel right about any of it, but I want it to be right for you. I think you are patience personified for keeping your temper and your comments to yourself, but don't you just want to kick something?”

 

“Oh, Kurt, you have no idea. You are so lucky to have Burt as your father. So damn lucky,” Blaine said, shaking his head at the futileness of it all.

 

“I don't want to say anything, Blaine, and make things worse for you – and more than that, honey, I don't want you to feel bad because of anything I might say about it. I think in this case, I better keep my mouth shut, don't you think? Just to keep the peace?” Kurt reasoned.

 

“Kurt, while it is true that you can go a bit...ah, overboard in your opinions,” Blaine ducked expertly as Kurt threw a pillow from the sofa at him, “the truth is that I value your opinion. I am not going to be upset at what you might say, and candidly? I could use some perspective on this whole thing.”

 

“Okay. First, know that I love Cooper. I am so happy that he is your father. He had obviously loved you his whole life and if he's having some issues with making the brother-to-brother dynamic change smoothly to the father-to-son dynamic, nobody can fault him because he's trying with his whole heart.

 

“As for Sasha, Well, I might be a bit different in my assessment of her. She was older than Coop and while that might make most people think she is the one at fault, I don't agree. They were both responsible, as much as a person of that age could be. I started out being angry at her, but after hearing her side of it? I don't know. I do believe that even if she was wrong, she has paid for her mistake. She had you taken from her, and she has spent the rest of her life feeling she wasn't good enough for anyone else. I know that feeling, Blaine. 

 

“I don't want to influence you or tell you how to think, but I'd like to plant a seed. Think about how this will all end up. Do you want to just be angry at her for the rest of your life, pushing away two people who love you? Yes, you'll have me. Always, baby,” Kurt looked at Blaine's eyes and thumbed across his cheek in adoration. “But do you want to give up any chance at having some sort of parental relationship with them? Is it worth nursing your indignation?

 

“Plus, that baby girl is going to need her brother. Don't you think?” Kurt kissed him on his cheek this time, putting his finger on Blaine's chin to tilt his head up. He raised his eyebrows in question.

 

“You're right, Kurt. I can bury my animosity. I want it to be okay between Cooper and me again. I want to be a good brother to the baby. And, as long as I'm confessing, after listening to you...I do want to develop something between Sasha and me. Thank you, my love, for seeing into my heart once again and telling what you see. I do love you.”

 

They sat and talked for a while, but nothing was solved and the conversation faded. 

 

* * *

 

 

They slipped out of their clothes, putting on their pajamas and got into bed. It was the thing they had both needed most... rest and silence, shared love and each other. Kurt was the big spoon, holding Blaine close and kissing his neck. 

 

“Blaine?” Kurt asked, holding him close and playing with his fingers as they held hands.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“We've talked about getting married one day,” Kurt said softly.

 

“Yes, we have. I keep thinking it's a long way off, that it doesn't matter because of what we already have. But we're going to be graduating soon, and then hopefully off to New York. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Kurt,” Blaine said, looking over at Kurt's blue-gray eyes as they cuddled under the blankets.

 

“I want the same thing, love. Have you given any thought to having children?” Kurt asked.

 

“Sort of abstractly, I can see us walking through Central Park with a golden retriever on a leash and a baby in a pram. But other than slight daydream glimpses like that, no - not really.”

 

“So, you have given it a little thought, then? I mean.....I know we have college to get through first, and careers to establish, but one day?”

 

“I think I do, Kurt. With you. I think you'd be a great dad, like Burt. You have all the right instincts, all the right role models, I just think you'll be perfect,” Blaine said, barely above a whisper. He brought Kurt's hand up to his mouth and kissed it, settling their hands back down between them as he sighed.

 

“What about you, Blaine? I think you would, too. You are funny and formal, giggly and deadpan serious, and you love like nobody I've ever seen,” Kurt told him. Blaine's eyes got big.

 

“Kurt, what does making love have to do with this...well, other than the obvious, which with us will involve surrogates and petri dishes?” Blaine asked.

 

“I don't mean MAKING love, although you do that like there's a prize to be won, but you love the people you love with such passion. You know I love you with all my heart, Blaine, but I don't love with that burning passion that you do. This sounds cliché, but your heart is on fire when it comes to the people you love, do you know how rare that is? I'm in awe of it,” Kurt said, a whisper in Blaine's ear as Kurt kissed up his neck and then along his jaw. “I'm in love with the most passionate person I've ever met, and I feel so damned lucky to have you, baby. Damned lucky.”

 

Blaine snuggled his nose in Kurt's sweet-smelling neck and tried not to smile, but the words of praise made him feel lighthearted and happy. He never heard them before he met Kurt, and now they fell from Kurt's mouth in a never-ending spill. Blaine didn't want to think of himself as vulnerable to sweet talk, but in this case, Kurt could make him believe anything.

 

“Blaine, are you really tired?” Kurt asked.

 

“Yes, but it's mentally tired. It's tired of struggling with each new thing that hits me, and the hits just keep on coming, as they say. My whole life is just a string of misadventure and strange circumstances worthy of a soap opera. I'm the poster child for Murphy's Law! But there is one constant in my life that makes it all worth it. You, my love,” Blaine finished, kissing Kurt softly, “Always you.”

 

Kurt responded by kissing back, tugging Blaine closer and continuing to kiss him. He unbuttoned the pajama shirt, and when he removed the sleeve, he took Blaine's hand and held it up, mouthing kisses on the tender skin of the inside of his wrist. He ran his hands down Blaine's back, always gentle, soft as he kept removing each piece of clothing. As he took off each piece, he smoothed Blaine's skin, kissing and mouthing as he went, making love to every part of his boyfriend. By the time everything was removed, Blaine was lying back in the bed, groaning as the pleasure continued. Each inch of warm skin uncovered was a cause of celebration for Kurt. The golden tan color of his skin was so beautiful with the rosy blush as Kurt whispered to him, the silky black curls were soft and luxurious. 

 

“Blaine, you are the most beautiful man I've ever seen in my life,” Kurt whispered into his ear, licking around the shell and under the lobe, trailing down to lap at his jaw. Blaine closed his eyes, just drinking in the feel of Kurt's warm, soft tongue. 

 

“Take off your pajamas, Kurt. I want to see you naked,” Blaine said back to him, running his finger down Kurt's chest where his shirt was already open, showing his toned muscles. There was no hesitation as Kurt got up, sliding his pants down and then removing his jockey shorts. Blaine looked across the bed, as if seeing Kurt's body for the first time. Ah, the first time he had seen Kurt's body. He liked that thought so much, he closed his eyes and brought that memory into focus. He had been so scared, wanting to run or hide or something. Spending his early pubescent years alone in the attic, he had no reference to how to do the whole intimate relationship dance. He felt awkward and stupid whenever he even thought about it.

 

Then came Kurt, and although Blaine was still apprehensive, Kurt made it feel okay. He never laughed at him, never made Blaine the butt of the joke, even when things were uncomfortable, and Blaine was so thankful for that. He had wanted to touch Kurt, to feel his skin and see him – all of him. Blaine had never had the experience of being in a locker room or anywhere else he might have seen a naked boy, so he tended to stare when he caught a glimpse of Kurt. Kurt could have been upset at that, could have made Blaine feel bad or nervous, but he never did. He didn't say much about it, not wanting to make matters worse by over talking the situation, but Blaine noticed he left the light on more often when he changed his clothes at night, after Blaine mentioned it. Kurt would get up in the morning and get ready for his shower, but he stripped down in the bedroom, not the bathroom with the door closed. He would nonchalantly walk around, looking for his outfit for the day, bending and stretching in full view of Blaine. If someone else had done it, Blaine might have thought it was seduction, but he just knew that when Kurt did it, it was to make Blaine feel more comfortable with his own body. 

 

Not that Kurt's naked body didn't make Blaine feel those things. He often stayed under the cover of the blankets because looking at the long limbs, the easy grace, the toned muscles, and beautiful cock of Kurt's body would bring thoughts of what it would feel like to touch, to feel, to taste and Blaine simply could not hide the hard erection he got when thinking those thoughts about Kurt. After months of this, he began to think Kurt had changed, that now it was a tiny bit of teasing along with making Blaine less self-conscious. 

Kurt started removing his pajamas before he got out of bed, snuggling his bare skin close to Blaine, holding him tight some mornings before going to take his shower. On those days, Blaine could plainly see Kurt's erection as he made his way to the bathroom, holding his clothes in his hands and walking with that easy grace that defined everything Kurt did.

 

Blaine opened his eyes, finding Kurt looking at him curiously.

 

“Is everything okay, Bee? It looked like you were a million miles away from me,” Kurt said, frown lines wrinkling his forehead.

 

“No, just thanking the stars that I have you, Kurt, to be with me, to keep me grounded, to love me. I must be the luckiest person on earth,” Blaine smiled up at his shining superstar and the sun broke out, in the form of Kurt's smile as he lay back down on the bed next to the boy he loved with all of his heart.

 

“Maybe we're both lucky, Blaine. I know I feel that way, that I'm the luckiest person on earth to have you in my life. And I never want to let you go, baby, never.” Kurt smiled at Blaine, taking his hand once again to take up kissing the inside of his wrist and trail up the inside of his arm until the shivers and goose bumps were covering Blaine's arms and chest, whining to get closer to Kurt so he could nibble on his neck. It was often these tiny things, the small caress of the back of his knee, a breath in his ear, the feel of warm fingertips touching his as they woke from a nap in each other's arms...these small things that meant the most to Blaine and to Kurt. 

 

Of course Blaine knew important things such as Kurt preferred that Blaine not pump his cock when he was bottoming until he had established the rhythm. But it almost meant more that Blaine knew the tiny things, like that all he had to do was blow his breath over Kurt's nipple after an orgasm to get him to moan in pleasure, he was so sensitive. Maybe it was being together for two years that made them know these things about each other, but Blaine thought it was because they really cared to find these things out. That might be the whole thing, actually. Blaine divided love into two parts: care and lust. In his mind, both were central to the whole. He cared about Kurt, about his physical, mental and spiritual well-being. He wanted Kurt to be happy, to have the tools to achieve his goals in life, and he wanted to be a part of that, every day. The flip side was lust, and boy did he lust after Kurt. It only took the sound of Kurt's voice in the morning to make Blaine hard as a brass rod. Thinking about Kurt's body, his hands on him, his breath close, his eyes holding Blaine's like a vise, for Blaine to lose his mind and bury himself in thoughts of Kurt. He took a deep breath to stop analyzing everything and just give himself up to what was happening right at that moment. 

 

Kurt was moving from gently stroking Blaine to rubbing and Blaine was enjoying it. He loved Kurt's hands, how soft they were, how talented they were when it came to finding the places that turned Blaine on, how Kurt could work his hands and tongue in conjunction to make each touch a hundred times better. Kurt was doing that right now, and Blaine was sighing and moaning as the pleasure was building, ever so slowly, and he needed to touch Kurt back. Bringing his elbow underneath to give him leverage, he gently pushed Kurt down on his back and nuzzled his nose in the closest part of his boyfriend – his navel. He rubbed his cheek across the toned abs, stroking up his thigh as he moved closer and took Kurt into his mouth, swirling his tongue and letting Kurt thrust forward in reflex to push down his throat. His fingers moved from Kurt's thigh to gently spread his legs a little farther apart, granting access to softly caress and fondle his balls. Kurt moaned, shaking a little as his mind caught up with Blaine's actions. 

 

Rolling over for better logistics, Blaine took a pillow from the head of the bed and helped Kurt place it under the small of his back and another under his ass. Blaine moved Kurt's legs again, and taking Kurt's cock in hand, began to massage it, using a firm grip while he licked down to his balls, taking one into his mouth and moving it with his tongue, very gently before doing the second one. Kurt was humming as the tiny sparks of pleasure were stirring, tightening his muscles and closing his eyes. Blaine adjusted and licked behind the ball sac, his tongue wide and flat, applying just the right amount of pressure to bring a deep moan from Kurt. Grasping his cheeks and fondling them as he licked, Blaine reached his tongue to lap over his entrance, knowing this drove Kurt to wild extremes. Sure enough, Kurt began to squirm and squeal, forcing Blaine to hold him down tightly as he continued to lick and massage the tender and sensitive place with his warm, wet tongue.

 

“Blaine..oh, you know what that does to me,” Kurt whined, trying to hold still but failing miserably. Blaine stopped for a brief second.

 

“I do. That's why I'm doing it,” he said, grinning.

 

“Ahhhh...Blaine,” Kurt sighed, wondering if his heart might pound through his chest. Blaine usually did this for a few moments, often intent on the next phase, but not tonight. He licked and caressed like he was never going to stop, and Kurt had never found anything to be so erotic. Blaine changed his technique, now pointing his tongue and pushing inside while Kurt whined and squealed, panting with lust and desire. Blaine moved back to concentrating on the skin behind his balls for a moment, then taking his cock in and back to the pink asterisk that elicited so much feeling. It went on until Kurt was just undone, lying panting on the bed and unable to shriek anymore. 

 

Blaine had brought along their new favorite lube, Boy Butter, and he dipped his fingers into the little container he'd set out on the bed. He wasn't about to let Kurt get his breath back. He leaned forward, taking Kurt's mouth and kissing him deeply until Kurt responded with an urgency he hadn't felt in a long time.

 

“Kurt, baby, what do you want? Do you want me to be on top or bottom?” Blaine whispered in his ear as he licked his neck, biting softly to make Kurt shiver.

 

“Please, Blaine, I want you to top. I need that so much tonight, please,” Kurt begged, still a little undone by Blaine.

 

“Okay, baby, roll over...” Blaine asked, and Kurt complied, his thighs shaking from clenching them for so long. Blaine stroked Kurt for a while with the lube, gently pushing in the sensitive entrance and stroking into the velvety darkness. He closed his eyes to try to maintain for just a little while longer as Kurt moaned and pushed back against his fingers, asking for more. Blaine complied. Massaging and stroking against the bundle of nerves in the place Blaine had memorized so well, Kurt was relaxed and ready in record time and Blaine rolled him back over, gathering Kurt into his arms for a few kisses before he slid in easily. 

 

It was a wonder to Blaine that no matter how many times they did this, Kurt's body was so resilient that he remained tight and strong. It was sexy and hot and Kurt's muscles gripped him like they knew how much he needed it, which made it difficult in times like this to keep his mind on task and not just take what he needed, but give as much in return. He started off slowly, trying to cool down, at least in his head, so it didn't end too quickly. He had become a master at the slow pull out, followed by the fast, hard thrust that Kurt craved. 

 

He was not just enjoying it, he was needing it so much, the validation that Kurt was his, that he could control this tiny part of his life, that he could give such joy to another person, that was what was important here. He opened his eyes to watch Kurt's face, the look of utter wonder, the look that comes with knowing someone loves you above everything in this world. The beauty of Kurt's face was enough for Blaine, but the urgent, whispered words that came next, “Oh, Blaine, my love, come with me, come now...” and the throbbing began, pumping and moaning as Kurt let go, grasping at Blaine and tugging him closer and Kurt called out his name over and over. Blaine wasn't even a step behind him, the power of all that pent-up energy filling him with so much pleasure he couldn't take a breath for a long second, then it all hit him and he was shouting Kurt's name. 

 

It was hours later and Kurt woke up, tangled as always in Blaine's embrace. Blaine had a look of peace on his face that Kurt hadn't seen in months. Maybe they would be okay after all. Maybe the bad times were behind them. He kissed Blaine's cheek and brushed his nose against his curls, Blaine's face pillowed on Kurt's chest, and hoped that he and Blaine would be together for always.

 


	16. Weapons Nomenclature

“We have to have a talk, Blaine. I think it's long overdue,” Kurt burst out one night as they were getting ready for bed. Blaine looked at Kurt, a little apprehensive with the tone Kurt had taken.

 

“About what?” he asked, sitting on the side of the bed, his hands that had been buttoning his pajama shirt now lying still in his lap. “Should I be afraid?”

 

“Probably. But not in the way you're thinking,” Kurt gave him an encouraging smile.

 

“Oooo..kay?”

 

“It's about semantics. Words.”

 

“”What about them?”

 

“We have good communication, don't we? I mean, we can talk about everything, right?” Kurt asked.

 

“I think so,” Blaine tried a small smile, but Kurt wasn't returning it.

 

“This is about last week, sort of. We were in bed and feeling...amorous? Anyway, I asked if you wanted me to suck your penis. Do you recall that?” Kurt asked, not looking at Blaine at all. His focus was on a book on the bedside table.

 

“Of course I remember it...what is this about, Kurt? Are you questioning my feelings? Have I been taking you for granted, because if that's it, oh...Kurt!” Blaine was starting to get anxious.

 

Kurt leaned over and put his arms around his boyfriend, ”No, no, honey, that's not it at all. It's a matter of words...the words we use. When I said 'penis', you looked at me so strangely and you were quick to inform me that the word 'penis' is too clinical and very unromantic. But I just cannot think what to call...it. I hear so many things...Junk? Well, I don't like that because I really don't think of male genitalia as junk! Ah, and I don't like the whimsical ones...Purple-headed Yogurt Slinger? Really? Wedding Tackle? One-eyed Trouser Snake?”

 

Blaine was now laughing so hard, he couldn't catch his breath. ”Oh, my stars, Kurt! Where did you hear those? How about Little Soldier? Tally Whacker? Captain Winky? Ummm....Tonsil Tickler?”

 

“I swear I once heard a jock in the locker room refer it his as The Bologna Pony. Honestly, I did. But are some of the less whimsical names just as bad? I cannot fathom using those non-controversial names like Unit, Package, Member, Tool, Prick. How unromantic can you get? I don't like it when somebody uses a man's name, either...Dick, Peter, Roger? It just doesn't fit.”

 

Blaine kept giggling a little, as did Kurt, but he was thinking. 

 

“I guess I use the term 'Cock'. I mean...if I used Schlong, I'd end up giggling so much I think it would wilt. And food references? Pork Sword, Tube Steak, Veined Salami? Ewww.”

 

“What about references for semen? I heard Sue Sylvester say Baby Gravy one day – to Mr Schuester! I don't want to know what the rest of that conversation was about,” Blaine laughed.

 

“I heard it referred to as 'Boy Pudding',” Kurt added, a smirk on his face.

 

“Protein Shake through a Meat Straw,” Blaine deadpanned and Kurt choked. “Some aren't so bad....penis names, not semen I mean. Magic Wand? You certainly have a magic wand, Kurt,” Blaine smiled and Kurt blushed. 

 

“Maybe, but I don't think I want you to call it that. Love Muscle? Divine Rod? Throbbing Python of Love?? Hmmmmm...Joystick? That at least implies you can play with it,” Kurt said, giggling."How about Anderconda? Or is that a bit too personal?"  


 

“Wow, Kurt. I've never felt so unsexy in my life while talking about boy parts. Okay, I will never criticize you for saying 'penis' again,” Blaine said seriously. “but, we don't have to actually _talk_ about it to enjoy it...” he said, his hand sliding up Kurt's thigh to palm that particular piece of anatomy through his pajamas. 

 

“Nope, no words needed at all,” Kurt agreed with a frisky grin, turning off the bedside lamp before dragging Blaine under the covers to have a wordless discussion. 

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Blainers! Squirt, where are you?” Cooper shouted, rushing into the Hummel house looking for his son.

 

“Coop? What's up?” Blaine asked, walking into the room from the kitchen, Kurt right behind him.

 

“I've got it!” Cooper crowed, waving a paper around his head, a huge smile on his face and sparkles in his blue eyes. He ran to Blaine, picking him up and twirling him in a circle, his arms tight around him as Kurt backed up so as not to be knocked over by Blaine's flying feet.

 

“What, Cooper?” Blaine asked, a smile cracking his face as Cooper's contagious enthusiasm infected him.

 

“Look!” he set Blaine down and handed him the paper he'd been flapping around.

 

Blaine looked at the paper, stumbled a little as Cooper and Kurt both jumped to catch him and eased him down in a chair. 

 

“This...this is my birth certificate. But it isn't the same one,” he looked at Cooper.

 

“No, Blaine. This is the real one. With your real parents. Blaine.....finally, this is all for you,” Cooper grinned.

 

“Mother: Sasha Moira Maguire. Father: Cooper Matthew Anderson,” Blaine read, smiling.

 

Cooper sat in another chair, looking at Blaine.

 

“Thank you............ Dad.” 

 

Cooper burst into tears.

 

“Oh, Blaine, I never thought I'd ever hear you call me that,” Cooper said, hugging his son to him. 

 

Kurt slipped out the door and into the kitchen, wiping tears from his own face, giving Blaine and Cooper time to bond. He was so happy for them. He reached up into the cupboard, gathering ingredients for a cake. This called for a celebration.

 

* * *

 

 

Lauren and Puck sat together at the Hummel dining table, hands twined together and eyes on each other. Santana and Brittany were there, too, quietly whispering and giggling, awaiting the rest of the gang. Finn and Rachel, Burt and Carole, Kurt and Blaine all sat waiting as Cooper called from the front hallway that they were here and on their way in. Everyone seemed to hold their breath.

 

Cooper came in, holding Sasha's hand. He looked so solemn, but happy nonetheless as he introduced her to everyone at the table. She sat in her chair, smiling at the people seated around her, still a little nervous and holding her hands across her enormous belly. Blaine had called her on Thursday to invite her to his celebration of finally having his real birth certificate and she was thrilled to accept. It wasn't until several hours later that her nerves started to get to her, but as always in her life, she kept her spine straight and took it like a soldier. She could get through this. Blaine had offered her an olive branch and she meant to take it.

 

The drive to the Hummel house was quiet. Cooper was proud of her for agreeing to come, he knew the meetings between her and Blaine had not gone well, but he was an eternal optimist and truly believed that there would be a way for them to be a family once again. Well, actually to be a family for the first time since they never were able to be one before. 

 

Sasha looked over at Coop. He was smiling that melt-your-heart smile of his, the one that had won her over the first time she had met him almost twenty years ago. He was much the same in some respects: his hair was wavy and silky black, such a contrast with his bright, sparkling blue eyes. He could pout with the best of them, but for the most part, he was a smiling and upbeat person. It might even be his best feature. 

 

Cooper was not skinny, he never had been. While not overweight, he had a lot of weight for a man his size but it was muscle not fat. Sasha always felt so small when she was in his arms. Sasha herself was tiny compared to Cooper. She was petite with emerald green eyes and golden red hair that flowed down her back in ringlets. She had rosy cheeks with a smattering of tiny freckles, a pug nose and cupid's bow lips – and everything about her was perfect in Cooper's eyes. 

 

Driving down the highway, Cooper had seen the pasture of cows. He slowed the car and got off onto the shoulder of the road.

 

“Why are we stopping here?” she asked.

 

“Because I want to show you something. This is where we stopped the day Blaine came to meet you for the first time – well, across the road. He was worried and nervous, and it seemed to get worse until finally Kurt asked me to stop. I could tell with the way Blaine was holding his chest and panting that we should probably take him to the hospital. He'd had his anxiety medication, but it wasn't enough. I was beginning to panic. But Kurt just took his hand and led him to the edge of the pasture. He looked at the cows over there and began to make up silly, ridiculous names for them. It wasn't long before Blaine joined in, each of them trying to outdo the other on the level of silliness. We sat here for a while until we had named every cow in the field and by that time, Blaine was calmed enough to go on,” Cooper explained.

 

“You're trying to tell me why Kurt is so important to Blaine, aren't you?” Sasha asked, looking at the sadness in Cooper's eyes.

 

“Kind of. I know you weren't really approving of Kurt the two times you met him. I'm not sure, even now, how I feel about him. As a person, he's great. Witty and intelligent, but also bitchy and spoiled. He is also kind, gentle, at least with Blaine, and most importantly, in completely head over heels love with our son. 

 

"I think I'm trying to say that I envy him his ability to be there for Blaine, to be so dedicated to him that Blaine can't see his life without Kurt. As much as I want our lives to be normal, they never will be. Blaine may be our son by blood, Sasha, but we will never have his heart the way Kurt has it. It's too late for us. Oh, I think we can make a life that resembles family, that _is_ family, but it will never be a traditional one. Blaine is on the edge of adulthood and won't be a child again. In that way, yes, it's too late for us.

 

“What I see is that we can build something else, a family that loves and respects each other in spite of what happened. Yes, I think Blaine loves us as his parents, but he's looking forward to his future, not backwards to what may have been if circumstances were different. He's a lot smarter than we are, Sasha, he's not blinded by his past. We are saying to everyone we meet that we want to go back and relive what has passed us by. Blaine and Kurt are looking to their future, and although it contains us, the thing they are focusing on is a life together. Maybe we should take a page from their book and stop living in the past. Maybe we should look to the future,” Cooper said. 

 

Sasha came close and leaned up against him. She reached up and drew her fingers through his wavy hair and sighed.

 

“You're right, Cooper. We need to do that. I love you so much,” she said, and got back in the car, her heart breaking over Blaine, but still hopeful for the new baby and a lifetime with Cooper.

 

 

* * *

 

 

After supper, things had thawed around the Hummel table and there was the signature laughter and good natured kidding that was the hallmark of family gatherings. Everyone was so happy for Blaine, each person taking a moment to congratulate him or simply to lay a hand on his arm in solidarity. The exuberant crowd took Sasha in, asking her questions and making her feel like she had always been a part of the group. 

 

At a break in the celebration, Cooper had steered her to the kitchen for a moment alone.

 

“How are you holding up?” he asked, concerned.

 

“It's different than I imagined it, Blaine's friends are so sweet, and I can see how caring they are. So protective of him. I can't describe it, Cooper, it is just this warm feeling. A feeling that Blaine is loved and cherished even though all those bad things happened to him. A feeling he is safe in this world,” Sasha brushed a tear from her eye.

 

“Everything okay in here?” Burt said, walking in to get some more ice from the freezer.

 

“Yeah, Burt. I was just making sure Sasha was doing all right,” Coop answered.

 

“Can I get you anything, Sasha? Something more to drink?” Burt offered, although he knew that wasn't what Cooper was talking about.

 

“No, I'm fine. Burt? I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you've done for Blaine. I can see he's thriving in your care, in your family's care. I'm afraid there is nothing in this world I could do to make it up to you,” she said sincerely, placing a hand on Burt's arm.

 

“Oh, I don't need anything in return. I think of Blaine as my own family. He's a wonderful boy and – I guess you've seen: he's the love of Kurt's life. How could it get any better than that?” Burt asked, smiling at Sasha.

 

“Burt, where's the ice I sent you for?” Carole stepped into the kitchen beside her husband. She smiled when she saw it was Sasha he was speaking to. “Thank you so much for coming, Sasha, it was so good to meet you. I can see so much of you in Blaine,” she observed.

 

“Thank you, but I think he has so much more of Cooper...” Sasha said, maybe with a tinge of resignation.

 

“Oh, no, that hair? Your's might be red, but it's you he takes after with those wild curls and bright eyes. And that smile? All you,” Carole said, squeezing Sasha's hand.

 

Returning to the family room, they were just in time for a song as the New Directions began a sing-along, Blaine playing the little spinnet piano in the corner, Puck on guitar as the kids all started singing “We Are Young”, one of their favorites with Rachel in the lead. The adults sat on the sofas and enjoyed watching as the kids danced with each other, trading dancing partners and taking turns singing solos. It was joyous and heartfelt as they all talked, laughed, and sang into the night.

 

 

“Hey, Puck, you are sure spending a lot of time holding Lauren's hand. Did you bribe her, or was it blackmail?” Blaine kidded as he found himself alone with Puck for a minute.

 

“I...well, I don't mind telling you. We are getting serious. I mean, we've been going out for a while and we make out a lot. But she is not giving it up, not unless we're serious,” Puck confided.

 

“I understand that, man, so what's going to happen?” Blaine asked.

 

“Well, Grandma Sofie loves her. I can't imagine any better approval. Plus, I just think about her all the time. I think it's reached the point of seriousness where I might be shopping for a ring some day soon,” Puck actually blushed. Puck. Blushed. This was serious. Kurt walked in, his mouth gaping open as he saw the red face of his friend, so he looked at Blaine, who had a cat-who-ate-the-canary smile on his lips. 

 

“What's going on in here?” he asked.

 

“Nothing. Just...let Blaine tell you later, okay?” Puck said, clapping his hand on Kurt's shoulder with a grin and going back into the other room.

 

Kurt turned to Blaine, eyebrows raised.

 

“He's in love with Lauren. Really in love, and I'm seeing an engagement party on the horizon. Sophia has given her approval,” Blaine gushed, holding Kurt's arm as he grinned.

 

“Oh, wow, that's wonderful!” Kurt returned his boyfriend's grin. Arm in arm, they returned to the party.

 

 

“How are you feeling, Brittany?” Carole asked, sitting next to her, taking advantage of the rare moment Santana wasn't pasted to her side.

 

“I'm doing fine, Carole, thank you. I'm getting tired, so I asked Tana to get ready to take me back to the center, but things are so much better. The dizzy spells are completely gone, and my hair is growing back, see?” she ruffled her fingers through her two inches of curly pale blonde hair. Carole smiled.

 

“Ready, sweetie?” Santana said as she walked up.

 

“Yes, let's say goodbye to everyone,” Brittany said, smiling up into her girlfriend's face. 

 

“Okay, honey,” Santana smiled back.

 

“Hey, Pretty Pony Boy, where's your Prince in the Tower, I need to congratulate him before we leave,” she shouted over to Kurt, walking over to throw her arms around her friend as they went in search of Blaine.

 

Sasha just stared. Leaning over to Cooper, who was chuckling, she looked at him in startled askance.

 

“Santana is...unique. She calls Blaine the 'Prince in the Tower' because Kurt and Puck found him in that room in the attic. If anyone else were to call him that, I'd probably punch them in the kisser, but with Santana, it just shows she cares. She's had an eventful life of her own, but she would do anything for her friends. You know when I told you that Blaine ran away for a few weeks earlier this year? Santana stayed with Kurt, morning, noon, and night, stuck to him like glue until they found Blaine. You'd have to go a long way to find someone as loyal as Santana Lopez.”

 

Sasha smiled at Cooper, happy that Blaine had such a loyal and loving group of friends.

 

After the friends left and Finn took Rachel home, Carole and Burt went up to bed. Kurt and Blaine were left sitting with Sasha and Cooper.

 

“Thank you for inviting me, Blaine. I had a lovely time and I was so glad to meet your friends. It's going to be hard to leave them when you move to New York, isn't it?” she asked.

 

“Yes, but I'll have Kurt, so I'll be fine. Oh, and you and Cooper. It's not like I'll be alone or anything. It will be hard, I mean, I've made such good friends here. And leaving Burt and Carole will be hard. But we'll come back to visit.”

 

“You'll be fine, I know it,” Sasha said, getting up to leave, Cooper and Kurt pulling her to her feet. 

 

“We need to get on the road, but I plan to be in Lima day after tomorrow, Squirt. How about we have lunch then?” Cooper said as he hugged Blaine goodbye. 

 

“Sounds good to me,” Blaine agreed. 

 

Kurt hugged Coop and shook hands with Sasha as they left, Blaine giving Sasha a stiff hug, trying not to bump into her huge belly and they ended up laughing at the awkwardness of it all.

 

“Will I see you for lunch, too?” he asked.

 

“No, I have a doctor's appointment. Your sister is already stealing the limelight I guess,” she laughed softly and Blaine smiled at her.

 

“Drive safely, goodnight,” he said with a final wave as they left.

 

 

“Will I get used to this?” Blaine asked Kurt, resting his head on his boyfriend's shoulder as they watched Cooper's car recede in the distance.

 

“Yeah, I think you will. I know I'm looking forward to seeing you hold that little baby in your arms,” Kurt smiled.

 

They locked the house and went downstairs to their bedroom.

 

“Blaine, do you think we got together too soon?” Kurt asked, taking off his party clothes and hanging them up.

 

“What do you mean by too soon? I'm pretty sure I would never have made it another six months in that attic,” Blaine kidded.

 

“Oh, my stars, Blaine....that is SOOO not what I meant!” Kurt gasped.

 

“I know, I know, Kurt. I was joking. But I really don't know what you mean by 'too soon',” Blaine said, unbuttoning his own shirt after folding the sweater vest he'd chosen for the party.

 

“It's just that we are together, and we've talked it over – we both want the same thing, to spend our lives together. But will we regret that one day? That we never really dated anyone else, never experienced anyone else?” Kurt looked a bit sad.

 

“Oh. Kurt? Are you trying to tell me something?” Blaine sat beside Kurt on the bed, taking his hand and resting it on his thigh. He sat there in his boxer briefs until the chill air began to make him cold, then he set Kurt's hand down and slipped off his underwear and put on the red silk pajamas he had laid out. He pulled Kurt up and helped him take off the rest of his clothes and put on his own pajamas. They didn't say anything until they were under the covers.

 

“I'm really not trying to spread gloom and doom, especially about us, but I need to tell you, Blaine, that I've been worried. I don't want you to wake up one day twelve years from now and think that you missed out on trying everything. On meeting a new guy and flirting with him. On doing the whole chase and catch dance that you'd get from dating more than one person in your life. You've already been denied so many things, I don't want to be the cause of you closing one more door,” Kurt stammered, trying to keep his voice even.

 

“Why would you ever think that?” Blaine practically yelled, beginning to panic.

 

“Let me finish, baby. I want you to know if I'm enough for you. If I'm really the right person for you. How can you know that if I'm the only boy you ever kissed? If I'm the only one you ever made love to? Oh, shit. The bottom line is that I don't want you to regret being with me, Blaine. My heart couldn't take that.”

 

Blaine turned Kurt to face him and kissed his cheek. He looked into Kurt's blue eyes, past the sadness, past the tears ready to spill, down to reach the soul of his boyfriend, the boy he wanted to spend the rest of his life loving. Kurt looked back, Blaine's golden hazel eyes burning into him.

 

“Kurt, I do not want anyone else. I only want you, and I cannot imagine a day when you wouldn't be enough for me. If I chose to live my life on this “what if” philosophy, who knows where it might take me? I wouldn't apply to colleges because they might not accept me, I wouldn't cook dinner because who knows if I'll be alive to eat it, there might be an earthquake and we'll get swallowed up. I can't do that to myself, Kurt. I can't pretend to have a life but be scared to do anything because it might not turn out according to plan. No. I want to _live_ my life, Kurt, and I want to live it with you. Do you understand?” Blaine asked, trying to calm his heartbeat down. “Or are you having second thoughts? Do you want to go on a break so you can meet other boys? Try out the competition? I can wait for you, Kurt, if that's what you want. I'll still be here, no matter what,” Blaine said, but he looked sad.

 

“Oh...no, Blaine. That had never crossed my mind. I don't care how many Prince Charmings there are out there. You're the only one I've ever wanted or needed, my love. I was just worried...well, it doesn't matter now. Are we okay? I didn't mean to upset you, baby, I just wanted to make sure that you were sure.”

 

“I'm sure, Kurt. You're it for me, forever.”

 

“Forever.”

 


	17. The End is Just the Beginning

_Ringgggg_

 

“Hello?”

 

“Kurt! I know you guys are in school, but ditch your last classes and jump in the Navigator, bring Blaine and come to the hospital here in Columbus, Okay?” Cooper's ecstatic voice from the phone filled the boy's bathroom where Kurt had gone to wash his hands. “I can't get him to pick up, is everything okay?”

 

“He's in class, Coop, but I'll go get him. Don't worry, we're on our way – tell Sasha to hold on.” Kurt laughed as he went through the door to find Blaine.

 

He walked, no - jogged, down the corridor to their Advanced French class. Opening the door quietly, he tiptoed over to Blaine and put a hand on his shoulder. Blaine was half asleep, but the touch woke him up and he glanced at Kurt.

 

“C'mon, we need to go,” Kurt whispered, turning to leave the room. His teacher stopped at the interruption.

 

“Where are you going, Mr. Hummel?”

 

“A family emergency, I need to take Blaine and get to the hospital. I'm sorry to have disturbed the class,” Kurt explained. He wasn't too worried, Mrs. Lindemann loved him, but he didn't like the idea that she would stop them.

 

“I'll meet you in the hallway,” she said, walking out the front door as Kurt and Blaine left by the back.

 

“I'm sorry, but Blaine's father just called me and we need to meet him at the hospital in Columbus, his sister is about to be born,” Kurt whispered to Mrs. Lindemann.

 

“Drive safely, boys, And congratulations, Blaine,” she said, smiling as she returned to her classroom.

 

 

The drive to Columbus was full of laughing and high spirits as the two boys talked and sang. Both were so thrilled at the coming event that the miles melted away until they arrived at the hospital, making their way to the maternity ward.

 

Cooper met them at the door to the waiting room.

 

“It's a girl! She is doing wonderfully, she is so beautiful, and so is Sasha. I'm so happy you two made it!” Cooper crowed. 

 

“It's here? I mean, she's here?” Blaine asked.

 

“Yes, come see her, she's in the room with Sasha. Hurry!” Coop said, rushing down the hallway to a room at the end.

 

Kurt and Blaine followed him, Kurt holding the flowers and teddy bear they had picked up in the gift shop on the way upstairs. They stopped at the doorway, looking at each other and knowing this little girl would probably change their lives.

 

Twenty minutes later, Blaine was sitting in a rocking chair, the tiny bundle sleeping in his arms. Her mommy was asleep and her daddy was out in the hallway making phone calls. Kurt stood beside Blaine, his arm around Blaine's shoulders and watched as the baby opened her eyes to see her new brother. 

 

“Her name is Olivia. It means 'peace', Kurt. Isn't that perfect?” Blaine said, never taking his eyes from the tiny bundle of pink and white on his lap.

 

“It's perfect, my love.” Kurt answered.

 

The tender smile on Blaine's face made Kurt feel so good, so warm inside. He just knew this baby was sent to bring peace to the lives of the three people that had struggled so hard in their own lives. She might just be the catalyst they needed to bring the shattered family back together. Kurt smiled and stroked Blaine's cheek.

 

“Oh, Kurt, isn't she beautiful? I am in love with her already. I can hardly wait for us to have our own baby, can you?” he said in a soft voice, not wanting to disturb her. Kurt's hand clutched Blaine's shoulder. He'd been thinking the same thing.

 

“I love you, Bee,” he whispered, kneeling down in front of Blaine so he could see the baby a little better.

 

“I love you, too, Kurt,” Blaine returned with a smile, leaning his forehead to touch Kurt's and give him a kiss.

 

 

* * *

 

 

** Six months later: **

 

 

“I cannot believe this is the last day we can do this,” Blaine said to Kurt.

 

“Oh, it isn't the last day, you still own the property. I think it was smart to put the locked gate at the entrance, you never know if someone might find it one day,” Kurt said, fitting the key in the lock and opening the wrought iron gate, closing and locking it behind them.

 

Blaine and Kurt walked into the tunnel that led to the attic of the mansion. Blaine wondered just how many people had found their way to freedom through this tunnel in the days of the Underground Railway. He was proud his family had been a part of that. 

 

There had been other improvements in the mansion and grounds besides the gate over the back entrance to the tunnel. One day Cooper had invited Blaine to come out and presented him with a large building near the gardens. Cooper was very proud of it, telling Blaine it was because of his story of his little pigeon, Chloe, that carried the message to Kurt that saved him. That story had really moved him and so he had a dovecote built so all the pigeons in the area had a safe place to live. Blaine had let Chloe go a year ago, but she still lived near the mansion and would come when she saw Blaine was visiting. She now lived in the dovecote, a thing Cooper was especially proud of.

 

The building itself had been completely refurbished into the therapy center and hospital, but the top floor was locked and only the Andersons had access to that. They had moved most of the things from Blaine's great grandfather's study up to the empty attic room, making it a cozy place to spend an afternoon. Blaine no longer avoided it, the awful panicking feelings had left him. There had been an occasional spell of PTSD from time to time or a nightmare, but he considered himself healed from those days of imprisonment. 

 

Blaine and Kurt strolled along, arms around each others waist as they made their way through the tunnel to the attic of the mansion. They got to the staircase in the wall and ascended it and flipped the switch to open the panel. The smell of books greeted them as they stepped into the old library. Walking through that room brought back so many memories for Blaine, of lazy afternoons reading the journals of his ancestors. They didn't speak, but continued down the hallway to the large room, opening the door. It was a new door with no lock on it. Inside the old furniture was gone – the torn blue velvet chair and the ancient mattress. Blaine had burned that mattress himself in the yard once when he was having a bad day. It had been most therapeutic. 

 

The furnishings now included the leather chesterfield, the overstuffed chairs, and the desk his great grandfather had spent so much time sitting at to write or read. The panels that had shown the marks of each day Blaine had spent in the room were still there. He had given it much thought as to whether to remove them, but in the end with all of the other things gone, Blaine had made the decision to leave them. They were a sort of testament to his ability to endure. 

 

The boys sat together on the chesterfield, cuddled together, just talking to each other. This was their last day in Ohio for a long time. They had graduated from McKinley with their friends last week. Brittany had been able to catch up with her class and graduate with them, and everyone was thrilled, they had celebrated into the night with all their friends.

 

Puck and Lauren were engaged. Lauren's father and uncle were going to open their business to both Lauren and Puck to join them in the detective agency and were looking at opening a new branch in New York City. Of all the close friends of Kurt and Blaine, many were looking at attending college in New York: Santana and Brittany, Puck and Lauren, and several others. Finn had applied at the Actor's School, but really wanted to be a teacher. Rachel was going to NYADA. It was leaving behind some people they loved: Carole and Burt, Sophia, but the boys would come home to visit frequently. 

 

“Are you sad to be leaving Ohio behind you?” Blaine asked.

 

“No, not really. All I ever wanted was to get out of here. I can thrive in New York, with you there. I'm sad to leave my family, but otherwise, I'm so ready to go,” Kurt admitted.

 

“Me, too. But my dad will be in New York. Sasha and the baby, too. We've made the right decision to buy our own place, though. I think Cooper is sad we won't be moving in with him, but I think he and Sasha need their own space to bond with the baby. We're only four blocks away, after all,” he said. 

 

“Well, that sounds all nice and altruistic, doesn't it? But you don't fool me one bit, Mr. Anderson. You want our own place so you can scream my name when we have sex on the countertops in the kitchen, don't you?” Kurt grinned, tickling Blaine in the ribcage. Blaine gasped and rolled Kurt off the sofa, tickling back as they struggled together on the floor. A full-blown wrestling match ensued, Blaine pinning Kurt to the floor and Kurt tricking Blaine closer with promises of surrender and kisses, only to flip him over and pin him to the carpet. It was a fairly even match, and they took the advantage from each other until they were both exhausted and fell into a loving embrace, kissing and whispering.

 

“It's fitting we end up here on our last day, after all it all started right here. I remember my first sight of you, skinny and dirty with that mop of silky curls and those huge golden hazel eyes haunting me from your beautiful face,” Kurt kissed Blaine for a while.

 

“And I remember my first night with you, Kurt. I thought you were an angel, then I was positive when I heard your voice when you sang me to sleep. I felt safe in your arms that night, Kurt, and I've felt safe ever since. I wanted to tear this house down brick by brick because it was where I was tortured for so many years, but it is also the place where you found me and I found my angel. I could never tear it down after that. You are the love of my life, Kurt.”

 

“And you, Blaine, are the love of mine.”

 

“Sing Toora Loora Loora for me?”

 

“Of course I will,” Kurt said, taking Blaine in his arms and singing:

 

  
_“Toora Loora Loora_

_ Toora Loora Lie, _

_ Toora Loora Loora _

_ Hush, now, don't you cry...” _

 

 

* * *

 

 

The End

 


End file.
